Now if you had seen my blog I wrote about me creating printables for a happy journal I have created another set of printables for it. so see this below:
Hello and welcome! It is Monday late afternoon and I have Monday video for you to share, and this in video I talk about Events you can’t control and the things you can.
It is all about how you see things. When I have a traumatic event in my life that I couldn’t control I would automatically shut down to spend time coming to terms with and then give myself time to move on. For me it is gradual process, but what I have done that has always been the one thing that has helped me gain perspective, as that is the key, is to journal and then say, “Okay so where do i want to go now and how will I go about giving myself peace in addressing this event, so it doesn’t hurt me any more?”.
Life is about building and rebuilding as certain events we can’t control like COVID, comes into our life to turn it upside down, so it has meant that many having to work at home whilst the kids are shouting and screaming, being off school and then having to be the teacher aswell as the parent. Some people can easily adjust to this when others are left with thinking “Where do i start?”
For me it was “Okay, I will in this time spend that amount of time with Henry, so in the morning and then this amount of time to do work”. You find a way and for me it meant working and using the evenings, weekends when he would be looked after by someone else to have a break, and it is “Take one step at a time”.
Never rush in, but say “How can I deal with this and make it pain free?” So use some of the time to all of you in the family including your kids create a family meal. I do believe that Cookery should be bought back into schools, having your kids organize the grocery shopping for a change. If we aren’t have a load of picnic’s in the park, why not have one in the garden.
As I see it “You find a way of making it easy” and follow the day.
So, more blogs to come and have a good rest of the week.
many thanks for watching my videos and reading this blog,
Hello and welcome! So in this weeks Monday post I am talking about 10 Ways of Creating a Life to remember.
To do that I what want to go through the things you still love in your life. Now when doing this be really true to yourself and don’t say it because you feel it is the right thing to say, but that is a true feeling inside of you, that you want those things still in your life.
It is more or less A DECLUTTER OF LIFE!
So where to begin,
I would write down people first, and I have made a Promise to myself to not allow Toxic people in my life anymore and if they want to be like it let them, I just don’t want them around me, as they are Toxic for a reason.
Then declutter the memories of those people, and take pictures of the true people in your life, so your memory focuses on those and not ones of those that bought you down in your passed
Then go through your possessions, and be Ruthless about it. I have a written a new EBook called Spice Up Your Life, and in it I talk about being Ruthless, and should be up tomorrow on Amazon.com under the name Carrie Lee Holmes
Create a Wall Full of Happiness, where you have all the people who you love and in a place you can spend 5 to 10 minutes looking at, and why not in your bedroom or hallway you walk through a lot, and with a cup of coffee in your hand, look at it, before you begin your day
Make some personalised items of your favourite photos and create a display of those things, but if you buy a mug for example you can use it in a functional way too, by using it as a Pen holder, but I would prefer to use it for a Coffee to be honest
Develop a story of your life so far, by creating a photo book and of places you love travelling to and have a travel journal. Or the same as with the Happiness Wall, have a Wellbeing Gallery on a wall in your home
Why not have your own Wall of Fame, and pictures of when you went on girl holidays and where you met the love of your life. It does feel good to be in love again, I think I need a bucket of cold water, but is that gonna stop me being in love? NO WAY!
Why not learn a new skill and document it as you learn, by keepiing a journal and pictures
Have your own desiginer clothes range or a series of self published books, as it can lead to so many opportunities
Develop a programme full of possibility and hope, by doing rituals and new habits that will drive you through a better and successful life
Now I know we are in Lockdown still but we have to face the fact that it looks like it won’t be shifting anytime soon, but we can still create positivity and even create more knowing we haven’t got to rush anywhere.
Organize a space a day. So I am not an organization enthusiast at all, it always gets put at the back of the list but doesn’t mean I don’t try. I love pottering around and when I had my own place, I would see a place that needed sorting out and just did it. It doesn’t have to be something that takes all day. I am moving soon, it is definite in London, and so looking forward to it and yes be organizing the best I can, to make it homely and comfy, which for me is important and with my new man
Add a new positive habit. So each morning I will spend sometime journalling, go through my notepad to help keep tabs with what I have done each day and that needs to be done, and journal using my new Mrs Hinch Activity Book and now I choose a song to tweet and is music that has been part of my life. Plus I write in one of my planners things I wish to do each evening before I shut up shop for the day
Take up a new skill. I love doing short online courses and will be doing more and I have some Online courses in Customer Service and it is great to learn different things and it is so easy to do now we have the joy of the internet. Check out my Education Network: https://carrieseducationnetwork.thinkific.com/
Read a bit a day. If you are struggling to read a book then have time set each day to do some and what I do often is try to, depending on the length of a book, is to read a chapter a day. I love reading and it can take me a while at times, but is something I have loved as a kid and it just helps me switch off and do something for myself each day.
Read other motivation blog posts and article. As part of my job as a writer I do have to often do research and read other blogs and articles. Let me just add I do not copy but it is for inspiration and motivates me to keep creating original content of my own and be in touch with the blog writing world. Here is one blog I enjoy reading via a site called Bloglovin: https://theeverygirl.com/
Do from 5 to 10 minutes of exercise a day. I do like to exercise but since being run down I haven’t done any for a few weeks but when I do it does relax me in a funny kind of way and helps get up and get out of bed each day. See my site where I talk about keeping fit: https://sportsandfitnesscoaching.com
Eat one healthy meal a week if not everyday and plan a fun meal each day. I love theme meals some days and it just helps with being happy to cook and motivates me to buy certain foods, each week. Check out my blog site: https://carrieshomestyleandfashion.wordpress.com site where I do a weekly Shopping ideas and Meal ideas weekly post
Create an online course of your own. I love developing new Online courses as well as enrolling on them and it can be so easy now. There is Thinkific and Skillshare where you can set up courses with no costs involved
Life doesn’t have to be the same everyday and you still being in Lockdown can have fun and be with family.
Never be stuck in a rut but make changes that will help you through this Pandemic and remember with the wonders of the Internet and modern technology we can still socialise and have a Zoom meeting each week to interact with people we still have in our lives and remember Facetime too.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: All my blog posts are uploaded to my network site and Facebook pages see links below:
In this blog post I am talking about Managing the mind as when we feel self concious it can stop us from achieving the things we want and often reach a full stop, not knowing where we want to go next.
So it is important we look after our minds and take time to deal with critters that creep in and stop you in your tracks. So the first tip is to,
talk to them in you mind.
So sounds a bit mad, but that’s just me. I say to mine “No I will go for a run, or I will fit in a workout indoors”. Having a secret mindful conversation with the inner critic can deal with head on and stop it from controlling what you to and stop you.
Drink something that makes you excel and breath.
I don’t function with my morning cup of tea and coffee, and it just gives me time to breath and focus on my cuppa and be with the world at the same time.
Find a therapy
So this could be Talking to someone, listening to music or reading a book even. Many people even use exercise like Yoga, as it helps you to get in touch with your body and helps you switch off and feel peaceful and calm
Clear Daily cobwebs away
So walking is what helps me with this and so does writing and listening to music as mentioned above, but also I have gotten into the habit of writing in my journal without fail everyday.
I also have been on twitter choosing a song a day that has been part of my life and why I love the song. I also write in another planner/journal of a wish or wishes
Find Stability in your life
So I have a new love in my life. Someone I have known for a long time and they give me stability and I have that part of my life sealed and desperate to see, as we haven’t been able to alot because of COVID. Stabilty can even be delegating jobs. Stop trying to do so much
Have Flexibility in your life
So what do I mean. I don’t always have things set in stone in fact I like to vary the things I do each day, and be ready for any last minute events. This helps stop repetition and becoming bogged down.
Embrace life and people
If you embrace life more, the more of a good life you will lead and this is because you aren’t allowing challenges to prevent you from having a good life with as mentioned above stability and welcoming new things that come into your life and meeting new people.
Leave out the old and live in the new
Words from a song by Dina Carrol “A Perfect Year” Written by Sir Andrew Lloyd-Webber and Sir Tim Rice.
So what do those words mean, well leave the old so the past and focus on a new, the new year. I have been someone who would dwell on the passed events in my life good and bad, and all the things that have taunted and haunted me, but looking back and focusing on good memories, my life wasn’t that bad I just needed to be with the right people, and to have a better life you do need to let many things go.
So be good to yourself. Leave the criter and be you. There are some great mind managing tips on this site: https://www.mind.org.uk/
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: All my blogs and video content will be posted on my network site:
In this blogpost I am talking about Who would I want to be stuck in a life with, and who would I not want to be?
Well lets just say IT WOULDN’T BE JEKYLL AND HYDE that’s for sure and there is someone doing Extreme Copying and no not them either. I am not scared of either but they just would make me want to commit murder.
Now I today used my Mrs Hinch Activity book to go through different words and what I would like to practice more of so on myself, so they were Kind, Funny, Loyal, Helpful, Positive, Tidy, Friendly, Silly, Fun, Caring and Loving. It is a Journal that I had been wanting to buy for ages and finally did.
So who would I want to be stuck in life with who is Kind. Well I love Jordan Page because she is a Financial Guru and I have kind of lost track from someone who as a kid, and yes me, have become wreckless and so with her videos, have helped me to keep on track and thankfully my writing has kept me a float. She is so real and truthful in her content and find her relative and engaging that I am a huge fan of her work and miss her videos as I have kept some that I like to go back to for inspiration when I need it.
I would say to go through these words to, and also used these words to look at myself. I give myself a hard time all the time, and it can be like I am hitting myself with a mallet all of the time. The other person who would be under Kind is my friend Laura, who I have know since school and would always have her in my life and hated school just like me and was my friend since those days up to now.
Funny, it would be my new love Lee and is under Kind too. We have been seeing each other for ages but never got together as such. Yet he would see me as his Girlfriend and last year was when we got together and I am so needing to see him again. It’s been tricky due to the Lockdown and Covid.
He covers all of those words and is very much loving and has a heart of gold.
Loyal is one of the most important one to me as I have always been like that and when I am a friend with someone I am for life, unless they have been secretly been rude about me, but I will always have peoples back and when I become a fan of someone or something I will always be unless again I find out they aren’t nice at all and just appearance.
The people I would say are Loyal to me. It would be my friend Hayley whom I have known since I can remember, and we don’t see each other a lot now, do see her as my friend for life and has never turned her back on me and will always have time for.
My Virtue family, who I am so amazed with. I don’t see myself as being anything than a girl who had a different dreams to most on my housing estate I grew up on, and has followed it.
So helpful, so this again is a trait I will alway follow and do wash up, even though this has been questioned. I will open a door for someone, but do want it acknowledge. The people who don’t say thank you when I am helpful not to be anywhere near my life, as for me this shows they have no respect for others and so never have time for people like that.
In terms of someone being helpful is my man and those who I have loved since a kid, like Oprah Winfrey, as her show she did was so successful because it wasn’t all centred around her but other people and not just the rich and famous, and found her show and video content as she does speak now at many Seminars, to be helpful. I saw that this successful woman had been hurt as a kid, didn’t always feel good about herself, and didn’t mind sharing it because she knew that there would be others feeling like that too.
Of course Mrs Hinch for her Activity book which has inspired me to write this post today.
Positive. So yes I have been doing lots of work on that, because I have sometimes been pessimistic and negative at times. I struggled through life some days and I am often anxious, and just now as I continued this blog was feeling anxious and I don’t often know why and I didn’t.
Using Postivity practices like using these tools in her activity book, has helped with that. Giving myself acknowledgement is okay, as I was often left to believe that I was wrong if I ever did that, but now I do.
We can often feel that we are at fault all the time, and there will always be those that can’t wait to have a go at your for something, even if it is breathing, and so being positive about yourself and life, by focusing on what yu bring to the world and life, and doing positive things, like acts of kindness and be helpful and funny.
Tidy. Now I struggle here. I am not always tidy. I hate cleaning and I feel somewhat positive again in be truthful about that. Now please don’t take this as I am untidy and I like mess. NO. I just find it a task to often pick up a cloth and wipe a surface down or vacuum and have the tendency to put it last.
In terms of someone I would be in life with who was tidy, it would be Nigella Lawson’s for her Pantry, have Jamie Oliver’s Kitchen, Carrie Bradshaw’s walk in closet and Jennifer Addison’s Friends Wardrobe and costumes.
Friendly is another trait I have always had and is how I have met a lot of my friends. I meet one of my friend Louise through watching the Rugby team the London Broncos, and I can be someone who shy’s away from people if I don’t know a lot of people and have suffered with Social Anxiety. However I have never allowed this stop me from being friendly and approachable.
I remember being picked on at the Comedy store and so many people were coming up to me afterwards and just chatted to me and it was a night I will always remember as yes I met Lee Mack there and we had a snog, then I got rat arsed like I usually did, sang karoake and how I got home I do not know, but was a bloody good night. If you have never been to somewhere like the Comedy Store then once Lockdown moves on, go.
Silly. Yes I do practice acts of silliness and sometimes like to just be silly even in my blogs, as that is me. I was called weird as a child and yeah I suppose to many I am, but I will always say hello if you are a genuine friendly as above person, and like to use my silliness in my books as I am writing a comedy as we speak and last year when it felt like the world was tumbling down, got up to This Old House by Shaking Stevens and was mucking about and it felt bloody good. Would like to do this again sometime.
So who would I like in my life that is silly. Well again my Love Lee, but also my cat Toby who would attack me regularly. Some are saying its because he saw me as his mother, well if I do start to eat cat food then I might take myself to the vets, especially if I start to jump at someone and attack their feet.
Fun. Well I love having fun, hence why I have written this blog post today. Fun for me is taking the piss out of those who feel it necessary to put my world down, and I am going to once I get the confidence is do dancersize and Boxercise. I just want to get rid of my swollen eye I have at the moment, caused by stress and get up on my feet put on some tunes and WORK IT OUT! YEAH I HEAR YOU SAY. LETS KICK SOME ASS!
Also this blog post has made me come up with a potential heading for one of my books or use it to create a Joke Book.
The person that comes into mind that comes to fun is Davina McCall, as her fitness DVD got me working out at home and now has her own fitness/exercise site called: ownyourgoals site and it has some workouts of hers and other fitness trainers and instructors, and I buy her fitness DVD’s every year. I just need a knew DVD player because my ex would often get rid of things and the XBox that was also a DVD player was replaced by a fifty two inch TV so I couldn’t use them.
So glad that, that is over we were no offence to him, suited at all.
Caring is something again I have just naturally had. I did cry when watching the Film Rocky Two where Silvester Stillion, charactor gets beat and alway sobbed to the book and film “Puff the magic dragon” if anyone can remember those. I wear my heart on my sleeve and never going to apologise for that.
Being Caring is in you and I am glad I am subconciously like that aswell as consciously. For me the person who comes into my mind when it comes to Caring, it has got to be my two Nans. On my dad side and mums, as they help bring me up and I spent a lot of time with them. That is how I would see many of my other relatives and I loved looking out of my nans flat in Doors road as it did have a brilliant view of Southwest and even Central London, and writint this makes me feel patriotic about where I come from. They would always make it an occasion on mine and my cousins birthdays and was my influences in my childhood and growing up.
So famous people it is three. Princess Diana, The Queen and Tony Robbins. I remember as a child I was very much a royalist and Lady Diana before she became a Princess, we used to see going to work when she like me worked in a nursery in South West London, and she would embrace people like no other and broke the barrier between us normal folk which I thought I was back then and being a member of the Royal Family.
Then the Queen also. She followed on the trend from her father giving a speech every Christmas and helped families through the Second world war as many building were bombed down, including where I used to live in Peabody Estate and was a comfort to people in the UK and around the world.
The other is Tony Robbins. This man changed my way of thinking just by one, yes one video and I was hooked. Now someone who I was once with in a relationship, hence why we never worked as I did respect his opinon but why we were so different. He would call it Brain washing. Well dah, no it is not. In fact it is far from it. He just makes you see that you are seeing regret for example a complete fail and I am never going to get my dream, to yeah you can. If you keep seeing failure that is all you will see. However if you say right that didn’t work but this is what I can do next away of moving you away from thinking you have nothing else to live for to yes you have everything to live for.
Then loving. Well again I am a loving person and perhaps too much some time, but seeing life now being in my 40’s it ain’t a bad trait to have and why I have met and come to know so many people because I will talk and listen and take in what people I have come to know say to me. I loved Butlins and the guests, as they would make you feel part of their holiday and that always made my day.
So for me those that have stood out for me in that category is my Aunty and Uncles as always used to on a Saturday as a little girl hope that they would be at my nans when we used to go over to my nan skinner on a Saturday and my mum and dad friends from Chelsea including my mums bestfriend Gill and family as I would stay at their houses with my friend Hayley and her sister. We used to go on Holidays including camping with them and I loved them. Plus all of my cousins even the most annoying ones.
Plus my inlaws from my previous marriage as they still looking out for me and love them still, as they welcomed me so well, and have been very understanding that my first marriage didn’t work out, and still send me messages to say so too, and I love that.
Some more people who I haven’t mention and that is all of my Rugby League friends I came to know as thinking of them even those whom are not part of my life now gave me a lot of memories too and made me feel welcome on my first ever game and that I had been going there for ages and so have to mention my friend’s mum and dad for that Phil and Susan Jones.
So why no do the same and use these words to journal how these words in Mrs Hinch Activity book means to you, and you’ll see that you do have more to life than what you may see.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: If you would like to be kept up to date of all my blogs and video content on this site then please follow and I also post on my network site:
Hello and welcome! First of all thank you for all your lovely comments on my posts and for following me on this site and getting me to 100 followers. It really does mean the world to me, and helped me get through 2020.
I feel in some way I should make a speech, but as I am a rambler a lot, I won’t spare you the pain.
So it is 2021 a New Year:
I have come up with a new programme called PROJECT 2021, which will include,
Goals
Habits
Targets
Prioritizing
Building
Creating
Learning
To do all these things you need to paint the picture. Now I am no Vanguff, in fact far from it, but nevertheless, when I set a goal I also create the picture, and map out the things I wish to accomplish whether it be writing a new book or try a different type of exercise routine, I map it out.
I suppose you can say that it is a form of brainstorming, and the one method you can do is like a road map and marking out each milestone you achieve as you continue on the road, to reach the ultimate target, and goals should have an end result.
To get much more out of a New Year, you should always prioritse, as the other important thing, which I talk a lot about on this site and will be getting you to focus on a lot, is having down time. Time where you stop work and you schedule in time to play with the kids and have a family meal together. That is just two examples.
I have been guilty in working all through the days and weeks, because I get so ingrosed in my work that often I forget to do this too. It should be top priority aswell as the work you need to get done or exercising for example.
Life is about making the most of the time and days, as much as possible, and that is not putting 25 things down for a day, but keep to a minimal list, so you have a purpose and a goal each day, and doing the things you love aswell as the things you have to do.
Here is my Pinterest board with some material I have pinned that will help you get involved in Project 2021, as I have added some articles and pins, with many Life Coaching tools, and more will be added as I continue to help you grow this year, like never before.
So to begin please join my facebook group and follow my Pinterest page above, and you will have full access to these materials, and there will be an online course created for this programme, with Youtube Video Content and some EBooks too.
Please check out my Facebook Group page which you can join and be part of my Project 2021, here is the link below:
Hello and welcome to my new blog post. In this blog I am going to talk about, Kick start your year by developing a new story of your life.
I often would get upset about the end of the year as I would get overwhelmed of what I didn’t do and wanted to do and would re-write the things I wanted to do, into the next year.
One tip# Stop making resolutions and make life changes as from my own experience, you are more likely to accomplish your goals set out and do the things you had planned.
If you could write a book about your life at the moment what would you write and share?
What positive feelings do you get when sharing your story?
Often we can feel stuck in a rut at the end of the year because we go round in circles a lot like I have in the passed, and this happenes it means we need to stop and develop a new story of our life.
So ask yourself, what would I like to be remembered for?
What do you wish to accomplish this new year?
How would I like my year to end?
At the end of each year I like to write in my journal and reflect over it, aswell as talk about it on this site and others (see below) and this year I found some questions online that helped me to do that:
When you create a new story then start going through your year and see where you can improve and alter so your goals benefit you not overwhelm you.
Never give yourself too much to do, and remember to do a list on things you want to do rather than got to do, example:
What keeps you calm and happy?
Is there a certain time in your day that overwhelms you or wish you could change?
Do you have a time in your day when you can take it easy? If so could this be implemented during other times of the day?
Who would you like to see this year that you didn’t get to see last year?
Where would you like to go this year?
What picture do you want to paint about your life this year?
Your top 3 goals
So I am going to have board on my Pinterest with a lot of Life Coaching tools, and this will be with my New Year Project, which I want to do yearly, called Project 2021.
Here is a worksheet that I have created as one of my own Life Coaching tools and you can download and print it if you wish too:
Hello and welcome! Now you aren’t seeing things I was writing this blog post at 3:25am, and once again someone has tried to destroy my soul, but everytime this happens I am not going to stay down but fight and let them know that they don’t scare me at all, and are just doing it for the sake of it.
I would sleep but if you read my previous blog post I have been having terrible nightmares. I can’t wait to start again and have a fresh new year to create and make lots, for you, and would like to say Thank you from the bottom of my heart for following me on this site and for liking my posts too. I do want to be away from my present situation. I no longer want to live where I was in Epsom, but live in London still and want a new life.
So how do you handle those who try to destroy and never support you,
Don’t give them the benefit. I.E: Focus on those who do have your back and if you aren’t ready to talk about it, allow the time with the person to switch off from those trying to hurt you
Create a plan to move away from them, and never allow their anger to rub off on you, and set them straight that they do not intimidate you, and they are making themselves look senile and stupid
Tell someone outside the situation. I suppose this is related to the first tip, but there are those that can have your back, but once you try to talk to them, they can shut you down and say to you that they do not wish to be invoved, so talking to someone on the outside, can be your safesst option
If they try to inprison you can call the Police as it is illegal to do this. It is a form of emotional abuse and a form of bullying
Bullies come as a pack usually, not as an individual so see if you can speak with the culprit on their own or have someone with you, to confront them. I used to think this wasn’t a good idea, but often when they see they can’t hurt you to get the reaction they want, they will give in or get more angrier and if they physically harm you then don’t stay silent, get help and support
If they begin to exclude you then don’t let this get to you, and get out of the situation for a bit. If they try to isolate you allow them to do so, so you can pop out and be with the rest of the world for a bit
They may try to push as many boundaries as possible to press your buttons, that will make you turn and be physical with them. Make it clear that they can do what they want but are just going to make it worser for themselves, and you do not care
If they start using your kids against you and not allowing you time with the children in your family, even if they aren’t yours then remind them you care for them too and would not do them any harm, or inform them if you are the parent of the child that you have a right to be with your kids not them. If they aren’t the mother either talk to the parent of what that person keeps doing and then talk to them once they are on their own to say, that there behaviour is not right and that you have a right to talk and entertain those children too
They turn everything you say. Keep a journal with date and details of the conversation, or record it. When they do this then remember that their hurtful words are more about them and not you. They just feel that you should be target number one, and want to bring you down to their level.
They make you feel that you are fighting a losing battle, because you feel that you can’t win, no matter what you do. So just do what you can. I got blamed about washing up, yet I always washed up but then someone didn’t like me doing that, so it was like “So what do you want me to do?”
Life can feel especially when you have these people in your lives hard work, but it needs not to be and so have a safe haven, a place you can go to take you away from those people, mine is my local gardens or the town where I now live in London.
Have something that helps you stay calm, as often people who want to destroy are doing it to get a reaction of hate back and to make you cry or be angry.
Meditation is a great way to switch off, or like I do, I get engrossed in my work whilst listening to music and sing my heart out, and this helps me stay calm, focused on the things that do love me and I love too.
Please stay true to yourself and strong and we can get through the time that are tough together and get rid of the negativiity that can often takeover our lives.
I wish you a good week as it is Monday again, and if I don’t post before new years Eve, then Happy New year and lets embrace 2021, which shines with many positive things.
I am listening to an ABBA song because music is one of my many healers, I was in the process of talking to a person in my life about this year and I still can’t talk about the first 5 months of this year, without wanting to break down.
I wrote a post, reviewing this year and want reflect on it too, as I want to address some parts that I am finding hard to talk about.
So at the beginning of his year from December to this year in March I was shaking like a leaf, was taking Diazapans, aswell as other medication and was a total mess. I was being hurt and if I say what, I know there will be people who won’t believe me, but I miscarried a lot this year without telling anyone.
I have been seeing someone new, as my marriage was over and I have now a proper true love but he was targetted to, and I have said this before, but it has felt like 4 years in one.
I was very suicidal and had a nervous breakdown indoors at one point and I still reflecting, I was having the most horrific nightmares that I am still having them, where I was going to be raped by a gang of bent Police officers, or be involved in a plane crash or be in a building that was collasping, the list goes on and on, but all there needs to be said is that they were so horrible that I still can’t sleep through the night.
Even now I write this I am breaking down, as honestly they have been the most horrendous nightmares I have ever had and I have been sleeping this part of he year up until midday, because I am scared of going to sleep at night.
I just was living in a nightmare, that at one point I thought would never end. I am writing about it now because I would never want anyone reading this to ever go through that. I realised that those who were making out were my friends, weren’t and that also were in my dreams too.
I feel very let down by some people and want this year to be gone. The other good thing that happened for me though, is that I am now a full time writer, which has been one of my ambitions since I was a kid, and I hope to be working in TV by next year, if all goes to plan.
I am now listening to a track that I have played a lot this year and it is the song, One & One by Robert Miles sung by Maria Nayler. It really has made me look at my life and see that there were a lot of begruding people in it, and I just want rid of all of that.
I want to be allowed at 42 years old, to live the life I have always wanted. I never once ever begrudged anyone, I was envious of people but knowing how they were, very two-faced some of them, glad that I am not like them and I am my own person, and have made my own journey into being the woman I was always destined to be, and I need to learn to give myself more credit than I do, as I can be my own worst enemy, and to stop doubting myself and that I can make it happen for myself.
So I want you all to do one thing for me. Look at yourself life like you have never done before and go through all that you have achieved in your life and the person you are and want to be.
You can do this anytime and at any age. I was writing journals since I learned to write which was very early as a kid, and loved making stories and writing music. It was a hobby that allowed me to switch off and be in my own little world. Keeping a journal is another way I am going to do this too.
Let me know what you have written down if you wish to share them with me either in the comments section below or if you would like me to see but not publish on this blog you can email me at carriesblognetwork@gmail.com.
So I hope the next few days before the new years is a relaxing one for you and there will be more to come on this site and I will keep you posted, once I have these up on this site.
Everyone can build a castle 