Hello and happy Monday! Yes am struggling a bit today. I had a busy weekend as my son had an end of season party at the rugby club, and yesterday we went to my nieces birthday party, and Henry my son has been unwell, and idea for my cheat sheet on my other blog site: The Parenting Adventures Tips and Tricks and will be posting that one after I have sent sites weekly sheet.
These are completely free to download. I upload these every week so please check it out and share. If you’d like to be notified of my blogs on this site then please subscribe.
Life can take many routes and before you know you see doom and gloom. There is no point getting up because soon enough it will be time to get back in bed, and the days are just fading away. This can lead us feeling that we are no good to the world, that we have nowhere to go and slip further down and that there is no use in living, as this is all you have to look forward to.
Planning your life: Create a plan for yourself, like if you have wanted to write a book, like I did then create a writing plan and do a bit a day or if your house is cluttered, create a plan to declutter one area a day and time yourself.
Feeling unaccomplished: Write down all the things you would like to accomplish, and start with home, then work and then play. By doing this you will see, that these are actually goals you’ve as often we think goals are running 5k in the morning, which is fine, but breaking it down makes it easier to accomplish and not piling to much pressure on yourself. As yourself, what you want your life to look like? Check out the printable I created for you: My Life Coaching Programme “Summer Project 2024” helping you have a better year and a better life is coming at the start of May 2024
Find your word: My word last year was Build because that is what I wanted last year, and build my content, build the relationship with my son and others, and build my knowledge and so did some courses to help with that, as I have had mental health issues and wanted to help others who may have had mental health problems and reach out. This year is it grow, which some may say is the same thing as build, for me building I think about bricks and grow I think about a seed. For me I needed to build my life up to make room for growth, and has helped me create projects like this one and I wrote a daily blog which I shared on my daily blog: https://mydailythougthsandfeelings.blogspot.com/2024/04/learningbuilding-your-knowledge-and.html
Making choices: Do you want to feel low about yourself all your life? When I read a book by Paul McKenna it asked this question and made me think, no I don’t. I need to get out of the bed, and get dressed, not wasting my life lying hear feeling sorry for myself. So address, using my work book, of what areas of your life you are not happy with and make the choice, to be happy or not to be happy.
Reduce your consumption of negativity: I try to avoid watching things on TV that are overly violent, or has a lot of blood in, as it can affect me. As a kid I avoided horror films because it would effect my sleep and so now I will listen to true stories, but it depends on what it is and selective on what I consume online. Now I do that, I feel better and the same with certain music.
I love my life now. It has taken a lot for me to feel this way and we all deserve to feel like this. I hope you find these tips help you and remember to check out my Pinterest and social media platforms as I have content on there too, for this years Summer Project Programme.
I am a typical Libra as I can be super decisive and weigh things up, a lot.
I often will let someone else decide and it drives me insane, and often the person.
I have learned to trust myself which is helping me believe in my own mind, and journaling and learning from others. Following good habits like seeing I can be organized, tidy and letting things go, and trying to change my hoarding and be ruthless and prioritizing.
Yes still a long way to go, when it comes to not hoarding, yet I have reined myself in and realising that I can save and not buy anything else, until I go through clothes that I still not worn or toiletries and beauty and stationary. I write a blog called Carries Versatile Fashion, and have Youtube channel where I talk about managing my money, and using what I have got, before buying anything else (https://www.youtube.com/@mywayofliving1602) . I enjoy building my wardrobe, having plenty of shower gels and make up, but if they are taking up too much space then, I know I need to use or let go. I know in my mind I can do that.
I believe that I can write a book and publish it. I can look after my body and mind, by exercising, but doing less to achieve more. Being kind to myself, by not criticizing myself all the time. Not giving myself a hard time If I make a mistake or when there are daily challenges, like yesterday I got caught out in the rain, still enjoyed the walk I like to do and achieved my tasks for the day.
It can be an event that can influence your thoughts, like when Princess Diana died it made me get off my arse and do something useful and made me see that you can’t waste life. Life changes come with changes to your own thoughts with yourself and others. I know if I just sit in front of my laptop for too long, loose concentration and get restless, and taking a break can influence your mind, and noticing your thoughts to rest and do something else. The mind likes variety not doing the same thing all of the time, and mixing it up so you feel good each day and now I write in my journal on my phone everyday on my thoughts and feelings and in my notebook journal, where I write about what has made me happy each day.
This helps believe my own mind and trust my instincts. I was working on my Life Coaching course and some of what the course covers is self doubt, and how you need self doubt to overcome it, like when I write a blog I often think “Should I post it or not?” but this stirs me on to get it done and part of building a blog is to write it and learn from each post, what type of audience do I want to get in touch with on my blog and how they respond to it, making sure it isn’t offensive, but real life.
I believe in my mind in a way that I reduce worrying. At one point I would live by my worrying and it can be so draining. I know for my mind to function well to eliminate feelings of worry, by taking action. Like I feel anxious about getting my son ready for school, so I will get up early now, to do a bit of work on the computer as at the moment he will sleep on passed 5am now, but after 6am and do his breakfast or his dad will, and not rushing around, but give myself enough time to look after myself in the morning to help get my son ready for school, and plan each day, so things get done and not playing catch up that can cause me to worry.
In the evenings I will make sure that I not on my laptop too late and listen to my mind when it gets tired and being on my laptop in the evenings would make my mind active again and would struggle in getting to sleep that would affect my mind the next day and so will read, get myself and my son ready for bed and will do stories and I sleep better than I have ever done. I do take medication to help too, but lowering my mental activity on my phone and laptop in the evenings, has helped too.
I set up my week by using my diary, One Note and my Journal, and like to plan my writing and editing of my books using my Filofax, get a vlog edited (my vlogging channel is: https://www.youtube.com/@typicallondongal
I plan the video for my other Youtube channel, which is all about How I like to manage my money, to help give tips in the relationships I have had financially and giving tips on spending and saving. Check out here: https://www.youtube.com/@mywayofliving1602
Setting up for the week, making sure I check what appointments I have. This morning I went through the fridge to go through the food for the week and when the food in the fridge have got to be used by, so nothing goes to waste and exercise and making sure I take breaks and spend time with my son when he comes home and managing and working on many different projects, helps to be in the right mindset, avoiding procrastination and missing anything that has to be done, which is top priority.
Please check out my new Cheat sheet for the week which is about Planning your week:
I plan what clothes I am going to wear and make sure I do some self care, like my skincare, shower or bath and winding down for the evening with a good book.
There is more posts to come and at the weekend started to plan more for my Life Coaching programme I do every year and started two years ago and did get real good feedback and help you have a better life and a better year, and grow each year.
So if you’d like to be kept up to date on my content here on this blog then please subscribe as it really helps me continue to build this blog site and help others have a happy and positive life. Check these platforms for more of my content, and can follow me on these too, along with other blog sites.
So today I plan to go up to London, and as always my inner critic is like, what if there is a problem with the trains as I looked there was, but was the wrong train. Now have my coffee and feel that is all I needed to ignore that inner voice. I am going to as I get up there going to write my notes for my Youtube channel: My Way of Living.
I was going to go by bus, but means catching three buses and didn’t feel like it, but going to travel back by bus. As I vision myself travelling to London, come the thoughts of what if I run out of battery on my phone as I like to listen to something whilst travelling, but I am taking a book and now I have my coffee getting rid of the negative voice in my head, to listen to my positive voice.
I am meeting my mum for lunch and sent her a message after realizing that I was looking at the wrong train and going to be go through some forms, to apply for my son to do an after school club at his school and one is to sort out my income. I like travelling to London, and know its my anxiety talking and know that its just protecting me and I am letting it control me, rather than me controlling it.
That inner voice when I think about it is like a barrier coming down and need to say “Hey, don’t put that barrier in front of me, I know what is out there that can happen and not go as planned but what if it goes okay? and get the things I need to do, done?”
So, I am going to not allow my negative thoughts gain control and enjoy my day, and as I am writing and finishing this blog listening to a Mel Robbins Podcast, and it things like that, that I enjoy that helps me think positively: https://www.melrobbins.com/podcast
Hello, yes it is a Monday again, I can’t believe that it was last week we had travelled from to and from Bognor Regis and met up with friends. It was so good to get away and not think about to do lists, and just be.
This Cheat Sheet is all about what to do when you feel overwhelmed. These Cheat Sheets are completely free and please share.
I will be sharing this on my other site The Parenting Adventures Tips and Tricks too, because as parents we can get overwhelmed and just need that time out to recharge our batteries and lift our mood and our feelings so we can just have time to ourself and not everything has to be landed on your shoulders but shared.
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My life has not been pain sailing, like us all, there has been ups and downs and when my mum or dad told me off I would be like, it was the end of the world and that I am right and they’re wrong, and so unfair, and would envy my brother, because he is super confident, and girls running after him, whilst I sat on a bench at school by myself.
I have had to really work on my self. I could get jealous, bitter and self centered, like “How have they earned that?”, “Oh they are showing off and trying to be super popular”, or like when I was a primary school, a girl named Sherie, was so popular and all the boys fancied her, and everyone wanted her company and be friends with her. I felt ugly and envious, that I will never be her, like I wished to be.
My mental health took a turned for the worst, and battled with my feelings for a long time. There were times when I didn’t get out of bed, and would stay in, and now I have been discharged from the Mental Health hospital, so proud of myself that I got through my fight with my mental health and not allowing my inner critic to hold me back and stop feeling that I haven’t had a exciting life compared to others, and that the world is against me.
Here are some questions to ask,
Who do you want to be?
Do you feel unworthy and that you’ll never be as good as someone in your life?
Do you feel that noone understands you?
Writing a journal, can really help address your feelings and what is it that is really bothering you?
For me it was, well if I look like that, like Sherie, then I will be as popular and the kids would want to hang with me, but that wasn’t the case and started to form friends as I gradually went through school, but it took a long time, and would have fights and arguments and was bullied. In the end I was well respected at Primary school. It took the last year to experience that, but that I had come so far, and then wanted to start a fresh beginning, at secondary school.
The feelings didn’t disappear, and got stronger. I now look back it was once again that I wasn’t fitting in, and was told by a girl that I was boring, because I was a fan of a TV show The Bill, and would talk about it a lot, and took it, and glad for her honesty and yes it hurt my feelings, but then she wasn’t perfect and would get on people’s nerves, yet we did have fun together, so I let it go.
With those group of friends, they would be into wrestling and one of my friends did canoeing, and shared our love of music. They were the ones who got me into following a rugby team and when I felt like I couldn’t buy chips in McDonalds they got them for me, and introduced me to rock music and went to concerts together, and made friends at my dancing school, and my confidence began to increase.
I have been unkind, and blocked people, because I was feeling excluded and it really was affecting me, because felt it was a personal attack. Now though I glad that they have done well in their life and now in jobs that are high powered, and looking after themselves.
Our negative feelings can rub off on others. I have been with people who would constantly be complaining. I am lucky for having the people around me that keep the roof over my head and support me in looking after my son, and at the weekend I met up with friends who I met when I was working at a holiday camp, and felt so privileged to be in their company as we had a good catch up, and that we all, trying to build our lives and be happy. I can be awkward and shy still but when you meet people, and makes you feel that you’ve never been apart, the fear instantly goes, your inner critic gets pushed away making you feel that you are worthy and people love you, and stop putting your guard up, and not allow your fears get the better of you, but make you grow and be the person you wished to be, and telling people that you love them, can help you and them. There are a lot of people I love, because they have been a huge importance to my life, and been a great influence. I am kind, I will be on time, and I will make the effort.
When you have been through trauma, it can make you angry, and “Why me?”, “What have I done to deserve it?” and often its nothing, its life, it can be unpredictable. Noone knows what is around the corner for us, and so, talking about growing our happiness, ask yourself, do you want to be unhappy all through your life? I have had to rebuild, and make sense of situations, but often there isn’t an answer. I no longer want my inner critic stop me from going swimming and going for walks, from spending time with my son, and go for opportunities, that can open many doors for me. I no longer want to be counting calories, and worrying about my weight. If biscuits are going to make me feel guilty, then I am not going to eat them, if someone doesn’t say thank you when you open the door for them, because what’s the point, they don’t care and not allow me to have a bad day, but continue to be kind and not allow their ignorance to rub off.
So lets all work together in building and growing our lives, its never too late to be happy and grow your feelings, to feel better about yourself. I do write a blog where I talk about building confidence. Check it out via this link: https://buildingselfconfidencetud.blogspot.com/
First of all welcome new subscribers, it really means the world to me. I now back writing daily blogs, and so check out this post I wrote today. https://mydailythougthsandfeelings.blogspot.com/
In this Cheat Sheet, which I free to print and download, I am sharing tips on What to take away From Each week:
I hope you are finding these Cheat Sheets help. Subscribe to be alerted everytime I post a blog and check out my Youtube channels for more content and on Pinterest too:
I think it is natural to think the worst, because from experience, think if I don’t worry than I worry if things go wrong and that I let the world down, because I wasn’t prepared. Our feelings can be so strong that we fear stepping another foot forward.
Life can be full of setbacks and things we come across that can knock us off, on our path for the life we want, but not allowing these to get us down and gain control so whatever happens we resilient to set backs.
I was working for a Kids Holiday Club a few years ago and it was tough and the day the Team Manager wasn’t there I was left in charge but my anxiety rose and thankfully the other girl, I asked for her to take charge instead. I felt so stupid, and getting excited of the opportunity I had really failed and that I was useless and there was a lot to do and in the end I didn’t continue with it.
To be fare it wasn’t a very good set up because it was two three playworkers with 15 children which wasn’t for health and safety perspective good and thought there would be more playworkers and more structure. A toilet ended up getting flooded, two brothers were fighting non stop and in the end the company stopped running and so I learned that if I do this again, to find out first if there will be more staff and the ratio of children.
Now though thankfully I didn’t allow it to stop me in building my life and take a different direction and would like to work with children in a educational setting and do more training to do so, and to help children with different needs, making sure I have the right support to do so, and stop jumping in with both feet and gradually build my ambitions to continue in following my dreams.
Also I have started to cook different dinners and changing my eating habits as this is a battle. I haven’t have stopped eating crisps all the time and have cut down on eating chocolate and going for the biscuits and so going to set a plan and reflect on your set backs as it can help you to have a better habits and it could be because they are so easy to reach and eating fruit can be boring and have a lot of vegetables and not snack.
I never want to have type 2 diabetes again and have a more balanced diet so have started planning meals again and still have the food I like but no snacking. I have had a eating disorder and so what to stop fighting over my eating habits but have new habits of having healthier breakfasts, nice lunches and dinners.
I am going to have breakfast later as I am not always that hungry in the mornings and continue my habits such making my bed when I get up, get dressed, get my so ready for school and taking my supplements and other medication I have to take and not battle with my eating habits, as it is tiring. Planning is the key and have been very good and continue to exercise to help be fitter and continue going swimming which I have begun to do again and training indoors.
I didn’t realise I had a Journal APP in my phone and been entering it everyday, and fill it in on want it is concerning me and address my feelings. I still like to write, but find it hard to stick too so now I got this APP makes me make sure I use my Journal APP each day, and use what ever to make things simple and easy access. Reading Atomic Habits has really helped me structure my life and not spend so long on one thing, but break it down and use what is easy access.
So as it is Sunday finishing this blog, going to catch up on Youtube and get ready for the new week ahead. I do vlogs so if you’d like to see these check out my Channel via this link: https://www.youtube.com/@typicallondongal
You have to make the right choices for you. It means saying no, but finding what is right, and if it doesn’t then that is fine. Saying yes because you feel obliged to, is not making the right choice, because you are not doing it for you and if it is going to stress you out and fill you with dread, then means you have to change it and go down a different path. This doesn’t mean you won’t succeed it just there can be many roads to take to reach the things you want to do in your life.
If it is not for you, then it is not for you. Not everything is going to workout, and if someone says no to you, then that is okay too. Trust yourself in making the right decision, journal or talk to someone who can help you, and reflect on why on this occasion something has not worked out, or doesn’t feel right.
Dip your toe in. Test it out. Research and try it out. There is no harm in giving things a go, before you make your mind up. I remember when I was first looking for work, just leaving school and was interested in working in fitness, and was offered work experience for the day, to see how it felt and it wasn’t for me at that time and wanted to work in a football club, and was successful, and worked at a local football club as a steward and did work experience too helping the Groundsman and then found my office job whilst doing that in London.
I did some football training, with the Fulham ladies and it was only a few sessions, and made me decide that I wanted to coach, and gain experience. I was a little regretful as my confidence really affected me in going, but I am glad I still gave it a try. Twenty or so years later I did an FA qualification whilst working in a call center and got to manage my own team, and learned from it, so it still taught me a lot and now we are in 2024 going to “Grow” which is my word for this year. It was progression but grow fits better and get another book published, do more training and looking for work outside and continue to grow as a writer, and have a lot of great things planned and it is planning that can help decide on where you want to go next in your life that will boost your feelings and raise your happiness, to not allow times when it didn’t workout, affect you, in following your dreams.
I always wanted to write a book, and as a kid I liked writing, but stopped and now found my love again, in writing and now written 5 books, which are on amazon my most recent being a comedy called Mum&Me. I now am writing three books, a book called When Mothers Are Real and Behind the eyes of the other woman, and Mum&Me book 2, and it was by watching TV that I discovered self publishing, and I really enjoy it, and now looking to work outside, and finish my courses I have enrolled on, to help build my knowledge and understanding of the human mind, and children and young people by educating myself, to help grow my blogs and books, to help you my audience, to find happiness and live a life they love.
Listening to the right people, who can give you the right support you need can make all the difference, and there are many ways to train and learn, without it being too much and if it is affordable. Last year via a careers service received some free training and I want to learn more interventions, to help people and getting to know the mind.
Our minds are constant running machines and it can either work for you or against and want to learn about how to, being a mum for example communicate more affecting to my son who had ADHD and is on the Autism Spectrum. Why we can be positive one minute and down the next.
Reading books about topics you want to learn more about, can be really helpful. I am currently on Audible listening to Atomic Habits and want the physical book, I have read to help me with my writing, Save the Cats Write a Novel and again want the physical book because I felt it helped and continue to learn as a writer, and want to do more writing courses.
So, never stop believing in yourself and trust your gut instinct. If you say no that is fine. It is all about what makes us happy, and lowering the expectation we set for ourselves.