Hello and welcome! So in this weeks Monday post I am talking about 10 Ways of Creating a Life to remember.
To do that I what want to go through the things you still love in your life. Now when doing this be really true to yourself and don’t say it because you feel it is the right thing to say, but that is a true feeling inside of you, that you want those things still in your life.
It is more or less A DECLUTTER OF LIFE!
So where to begin,
I would write down people first, and I have made a Promise to myself to not allow Toxic people in my life anymore and if they want to be like it let them, I just don’t want them around me, as they are Toxic for a reason.
Then declutter the memories of those people, and take pictures of the true people in your life, so your memory focuses on those and not ones of those that bought you down in your passed
Then go through your possessions, and be Ruthless about it. I have a written a new EBook called Spice Up Your Life, and in it I talk about being Ruthless, and should be up tomorrow on Amazon.com under the name Carrie Lee Holmes
Create a Wall Full of Happiness, where you have all the people who you love and in a place you can spend 5 to 10 minutes looking at, and why not in your bedroom or hallway you walk through a lot, and with a cup of coffee in your hand, look at it, before you begin your day
Make some personalised items of your favourite photos and create a display of those things, but if you buy a mug for example you can use it in a functional way too, by using it as a Pen holder, but I would prefer to use it for a Coffee to be honest
Develop a story of your life so far, by creating a photo book and of places you love travelling to and have a travel journal. Or the same as with the Happiness Wall, have a Wellbeing Gallery on a wall in your home
Why not have your own Wall of Fame, and pictures of when you went on girl holidays and where you met the love of your life. It does feel good to be in love again, I think I need a bucket of cold water, but is that gonna stop me being in love? NO WAY!
Why not learn a new skill and document it as you learn, by keepiing a journal and pictures
Have your own desiginer clothes range or a series of self published books, as it can lead to so many opportunities
Develop a programme full of possibility and hope, by doing rituals and new habits that will drive you through a better and successful life
Hello and welcome! Here is a new blog post which is going to be added to my Life Coaching Programme “Project 2021”, and this is about Get Your Life Together, so time to start making changes so you are happier and have more to your life than being confined to four walls.
Before continuing on please see my Life coaching videos I have created for this #lifecoaching programme via this link:
Not too late to make Life changes, as it is March but so what, you can make life changes all year round, and You don’t need the New Year to do it.
So my routine is one that has helped me to get enough sleep but still even with a small amount of time there is left in the day I still get stuff done. The point of working for yourself is to give yourself time to rest and recuperate and spend time on not the “Got To List” to the “What I want to do list”.
Set challenges for yourself. I do this a lot and it helps me to have a good balance, and so I tend to do this with money and see when I go grocery shopping of how much I can get under £20 and that has at the minute been my budget and use what I have, so I have not had to spend money on food for the last 3 weeks and trust me makes huge difference and when I am with my new family soon, be doing the same. Now when I move into my new home I will be increasing my budget but still be seeing where and how I can save money still. Just because you are financially secure that its an excuse to flush down to the toilet, but invest wisely.
Now I am someone that when I do sleep in I do have that “Waste of a day” guilt when it doesn’t matter what time you get up but What You Want to Get out of the Day. So the Life change I have started to apply is to Stop self punishment, as I have been so unkind to myself, that if that was someone else saying those things to me, I would tell them to leave alone and go away, so yes, #BeKind to yourself, have #selfrespect
I think we get so stuck on the New Year when it comes to making changes in our lives and feel some kind of New Year Pressure, and why we can fall, and not complete our resolutions, but I never make these, being someone who fell too. Never see it as failure as that is not right its because we are seeing a resolution being a one time thing, and not something that is long standing, so scrap resolutions and make a list of the thing you love and how wish to grow in the next years coming up. One way is to create a Career Tree, see below and an example of the one I have done, and I will add this to my Content Creators Planner I am putting together, so keep posted on details on this.
I have done a Printable of the details of how to create a Career Tree and how it works.
So to get back on track if you have lost your way a bit, that can happen sit down and spend time making notes and go through by keeping a journal which I use everyday to help find why your plans for this year have stopped as you can always get back into it.
Spring is a perfect time to make changes if not in the New Year, as that is when crops start to grow, animals come out of hibernation and give birth, and we have longer days and so don’t worry if it is passed the new year, You can’t still make a change.
Have a Pjama day. I spend my Sundays in my sweats which are also my night clothes, and it is really nice to have a day where I don’t feel I need make up, but sometimes I will and use it as my Admin Free Choice Day and I think this has been something I have done religiously going on the bible not never thought of it that way. I am a kid who on Sunday’s it was a day of a lot of shops would be closed except pubs and some restaurants and so would use this day to go and see my friends in Chelsea, watch my brother play football, play pitch ‘n’ putt at Bishops park, ride our bikes along the river and often BBC 2 would put on some old black and white films I loved and football.
So have a day where you can just do what you enjoy and some people I know don’t even get out our bed and still do work, but in bed, and when I am in my new home, very soon being doing this again too.
I also have days where I will eat something different and there is a wonderful Comedian who I do know so well “My Love” who does this, “something different on tour or on holiday that you wouldn’t have at home” and watching a documentary of this wonderful human being, I do too. ALWAYS! Why not? YOUR ARE ON HOLIDAY SO DO WHAT YOU LIKE AND as long AS noone is at harm, MAKE HOLIDAY TIME TO BE DIFFERENT TO EVERYDAY!
Then the other things is creating a good fitness routine which is a very common promise that people make to themselves including me and i am putting a new site together so I will keep you posted on this, but if you find working out hard just do it once a week, exercise whilst waiting for breakfast to cook or whilst the kettle boils. You can fit it in but Inyour own schedule not by somebodies elses, which is a common mistake.
Also to keep you fitness going each year introduce something new, to your regieme and fit in regular walking, as this is easy to do and easier to fit in and stick too. I also love doing dance workouts and boxercise exercises.
So do what you know you can stick to and if you would like to use my Goals list to set your Life changes you’d like to make then please check out my goal sheet I have created.
What you can do if you don’t want to set yearly goals set some for the day, week and month and I go through mine each month and with a vision board see my last post Creating a Vision board see if any of them have changed and often through the year update them and change, as often you can go in a different direction than the start of the year, so life is always revolving and I do live seasonally and change my life habits sometimes. There is always room in a year to start a fresh and using the different seasons in the year is a way of doing so. It is all about being current and being you still, but growing.
Here is a copy of my goals for this year on my Pinterest vision board for 2021:
So I hope you had a good week so far and see you in the next blog.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: All my blog posts and Life coaching videos can be found on pinterest site above and on my network site:
Hello and welcome! So firstly if you have not been following my series of blogs for my programme “Project 2021” then please go to my Pinterest board which has all my recent videos and blogs, which has a lot of Life coaching tools and information. There is also new boards and sections I have created too, if you wanted to look at my other boards and pins.
So in this blog I am talking about How to not get bogged down but getting it done/Being super productive.
I firstly work with one notebook which is my main one and for me is a life saver. I did a video on one of my other sites which I write, on google and did a video about How I live in my notebook.
That is the first,
Tip 1# Find a system that makes scheduling your work simple and that can help you stick to it. I am creating a planner at the moment that I hope will help you, and will be for fello content creators.
Tip 2# If you have kids then separate your time, so when they are homeschooling give them tasks that they can do without supervision so you get work done, and spare an hour to help them and use the evenings to block time out to do your work.
When I have my dinner or do my skincare of an evening I will use this time to watch a bit of TV on BBC iPlayer for example or watch a Youtube video, and it is great to just have that time and do a bit of reading a day. This is a new habit I am Implementing at the moment and it has helped me to read a bit of a book if it is only reading one or two pages. It just good to do things that help me wind down and in the morning wake me up.
Tip 3# Batch your work. So on some days I will pre-film a few videos or put together a batch of blog posts ready to go live. It can save a huge amount and then have a “Take it easier day” and have that time to catch up on reading or watching television. Or even some cooking or go for a walk if you have been cooped up within 4 walls all week.
The other thing I try to do is the night before go through what I have done on that day and what else that needs completed, is there any overdue items not done? What is scheduled for the next day ahead?
Tip 4# Plan ahead on some days, but don’t over plan. Try to get what you still have left from the day before and then get todays list down, and make time for breaks.
Once I have my own home again, which is going to be soon in a few days it seems, I like to potter so I will be each day even though I don’t like cleaning I like to, just go around the home putting bits away, taking anything that needs to be put in a different room that hasn’t been put in its home and just go in each room, tidying and straightening out.
Tip 5# Set time to do this each day or twice a week. I find doing this helps the chaos that life can bring be stopped and get up to date with Home Projects.
So I hope these tips are helpful and I hope you have survived lockdown too, but waiting for it shift and be able to do more fun things again out of the home again.
Many thanks for reading, ‘
Carrie L.M X
P.S: Please check out my Youtube channel, as I have today uploaded a few new videos including my weekend chat video:
So to Find Stability in your life so you don’t do too much and can delegate if possible, it is good to go through the work you need to be done, and that includes the things you enjoy.
The one thing I would says is make two lists, one with the things you like doing and a list of what you don’t like doing.
As you may already know I make aswell as blogs, books, online courses and Youtube videos, so this means creating a lot from the hip and with books, blogs and even online courses involves proofreading and editing, and these are my two items I don’t always enjoy, so to make it easier or myself I will when writing a blog post edit as I go, with books just continue with writing the first draft, which I call a lot my skeleton draft and then once book is completed then I will edit, unless it is a biography type book.
I am looking forward to having some help in writing mainly my books, to have someone to proofread and edit for me, or help me with it, as I am quite protective of my work and that it is still from me, if it is a single handed piece of work. When it is shared, which some will be, then it will like a weight off my shoulders and as long as it is from both of our words then, I would pay for a editor to go through books to check the spelling and that it is easy to read and is a good written draft for publishing.
Sometimes another pair of eyes can help find the mistakes or areas of improvement when it is not you, and what is important to me is to have work that flows off the page and is easy reading.
The other thing I don’t like is cleaning, yep bottom of my list and is something I would love to delegate but will do some myself, I just would like to have a housekeeper who can change bedding as I don’t make my bed and dust. Again is bottom of the list or not even acknowledged and I can’t put a duvet cover on a duvet to save my life and it just I find a real burden. I don’t mind washing up and do find this a therapy but a help of a Dishwasher would be nice. Now that is a thing I would wish for and I can’t wait to have my own washing machine again, as my mum has been doing this for me to help and it has, but can do it like I did before when I like and do two washes a week and have a tumble dryer. I love modern day appliances. I do like to hang dry on some occasions it is just take advantage if you can on machinery to do the work for you, whilst I drink a cup of coffee without it getting cold.
However, I would like to have time with my kids and have family time. It is important to me and so would like to have them still go to school but also join a club or time with other family,. Just be who he would like. I want my children if I do have anymore to take them to Clacton where I used to go as a kid myself and gave me so many wonderful memories.
I would like to have all my work batched and done ahead of time so I can still have blogs and books published but allows me to have some time off. So I would like to continue to write a blog post and have help scheduling them, with help with filming my Youtube videos also.
That is where delegating some tasks can help. Money and my finances is one and is being looked after and this will be a weight on my shoulders and I have tried so many ways to keep on top of it, but have failed everytime.
Cooking: Well I do enjoy sometimes but do like a Takeaway and I am not afraid to admit it. I also have a sweet tooth and did go through a phase where I was baking but because where I was living the built in oven we had was changed the confidence to bake went out of the window and do like to have on occasion have someone else cook whilst I eat, yet do still want to get back into the habit once I have my own kitchen to cook food from scratch that I like to eat and I am a dinner girl.
When I do move into London, which I am so looking forward to have loads of choice of where I can get food and am looking forward to a pub lunch or meal.
So looking forward to having some stability in my life and for delegating some tasks so I can have more time doing the things I love, not over working and be able to sit back with a cup of tea watching TV or a film or youtube. Life isn’t about doing chores all of the time, but being happy content and comfy.
So many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: Thank you for much for reading my blogs and following me and I also add my blogs and videos on my network site:
Now I know we are in Lockdown still but we have to face the fact that it looks like it won’t be shifting anytime soon, but we can still create positivity and even create more knowing we haven’t got to rush anywhere.
Organize a space a day. So I am not an organization enthusiast at all, it always gets put at the back of the list but doesn’t mean I don’t try. I love pottering around and when I had my own place, I would see a place that needed sorting out and just did it. It doesn’t have to be something that takes all day. I am moving soon, it is definite in London, and so looking forward to it and yes be organizing the best I can, to make it homely and comfy, which for me is important and with my new man
Add a new positive habit. So each morning I will spend sometime journalling, go through my notepad to help keep tabs with what I have done each day and that needs to be done, and journal using my new Mrs Hinch Activity Book and now I choose a song to tweet and is music that has been part of my life. Plus I write in one of my planners things I wish to do each evening before I shut up shop for the day
Take up a new skill. I love doing short online courses and will be doing more and I have some Online courses in Customer Service and it is great to learn different things and it is so easy to do now we have the joy of the internet. Check out my Education Network: https://carrieseducationnetwork.thinkific.com/
Read a bit a day. If you are struggling to read a book then have time set each day to do some and what I do often is try to, depending on the length of a book, is to read a chapter a day. I love reading and it can take me a while at times, but is something I have loved as a kid and it just helps me switch off and do something for myself each day.
Read other motivation blog posts and article. As part of my job as a writer I do have to often do research and read other blogs and articles. Let me just add I do not copy but it is for inspiration and motivates me to keep creating original content of my own and be in touch with the blog writing world. Here is one blog I enjoy reading via a site called Bloglovin: https://theeverygirl.com/
Do from 5 to 10 minutes of exercise a day. I do like to exercise but since being run down I haven’t done any for a few weeks but when I do it does relax me in a funny kind of way and helps get up and get out of bed each day. See my site where I talk about keeping fit: https://sportsandfitnesscoaching.com
Eat one healthy meal a week if not everyday and plan a fun meal each day. I love theme meals some days and it just helps with being happy to cook and motivates me to buy certain foods, each week. Check out my blog site: https://carrieshomestyleandfashion.wordpress.com site where I do a weekly Shopping ideas and Meal ideas weekly post
Create an online course of your own. I love developing new Online courses as well as enrolling on them and it can be so easy now. There is Thinkific and Skillshare where you can set up courses with no costs involved
Life doesn’t have to be the same everyday and you still being in Lockdown can have fun and be with family.
Never be stuck in a rut but make changes that will help you through this Pandemic and remember with the wonders of the Internet and modern technology we can still socialise and have a Zoom meeting each week to interact with people we still have in our lives and remember Facetime too.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: All my blog posts are uploaded to my network site and Facebook pages see links below:
So I wrote a post like this some time ago and said how I had a good foundation of people in my life, and that it is good to have that around you. I do still feel the same but the people who are now my foundation are different people and having a horrendous seven years, I have come to realise that those original people didn’t have my back and were very much against me.
I am someone who believes in Love that is out of this world and I have that now being in a new relationship which some may mock but I don’t care.
I was not on this planet to please everyone and to be like someone else. I am me and I am at a place now in my life where I feel contentment and very much sure of myself and it is changing those in your life that can bring a bad smell in your life alone and be with good hearted people who will always have your back no matter what.
I have created more Life Coaching video content on my Youtube channel and put together a playlist so here is a link for you to check these out:
It can be hard work when someone just wants to go against everything you say or do, but I am a fighter and have found a strength within me that I never knew was there and has helped me to battle my way forward and create a lot of things that only some can dream of.
Now when I say that I feel I have to justify those feelings, and concious of not wanting to show off but isn’t it my right to compliment myself? That’s been part of what has been drumed in me to not wanting to praise myself, but I am not going to stop being kind to myself as I can be my worst critic at times too. Recognising your strengths and self awareness is a big step forward and makes you see,
“Oh I am not that bad as I think I am and I have finally found the qualities within me that will drive me to success and forget those who want to attack and I am not going to stop believing in myself when once it was seemed wrong and will be my own Life Coach and as Cyndi Lauper sang “Be as Strong as I can””.
I am not doing this because I feel that I have not had a bad life because I have had a good one. I never was left hungry or without clothes, but now at the age of 42 have seen that there will always be those who remain your friends and family, but there are those that won’t and you just need to let go and push forward and live not exist, and create a foundation that is filled with love, faith and empowerment, that will catch you if you fall sometimes and be there to celebrate your success too.
So stay safe, stay strong and never let anyone get you down.
In this blogpost I am talking about Who would I want to be stuck in a life with, and who would I not want to be?
Well lets just say IT WOULDN’T BE JEKYLL AND HYDE that’s for sure and there is someone doing Extreme Copying and no not them either. I am not scared of either but they just would make me want to commit murder.
Now I today used my Mrs Hinch Activity book to go through different words and what I would like to practice more of so on myself, so they were Kind, Funny, Loyal, Helpful, Positive, Tidy, Friendly, Silly, Fun, Caring and Loving. It is a Journal that I had been wanting to buy for ages and finally did.
So who would I want to be stuck in life with who is Kind. Well I love Jordan Page because she is a Financial Guru and I have kind of lost track from someone who as a kid, and yes me, have become wreckless and so with her videos, have helped me to keep on track and thankfully my writing has kept me a float. She is so real and truthful in her content and find her relative and engaging that I am a huge fan of her work and miss her videos as I have kept some that I like to go back to for inspiration when I need it.
I would say to go through these words to, and also used these words to look at myself. I give myself a hard time all the time, and it can be like I am hitting myself with a mallet all of the time. The other person who would be under Kind is my friend Laura, who I have know since school and would always have her in my life and hated school just like me and was my friend since those days up to now.
Funny, it would be my new love Lee and is under Kind too. We have been seeing each other for ages but never got together as such. Yet he would see me as his Girlfriend and last year was when we got together and I am so needing to see him again. It’s been tricky due to the Lockdown and Covid.
He covers all of those words and is very much loving and has a heart of gold.
Loyal is one of the most important one to me as I have always been like that and when I am a friend with someone I am for life, unless they have been secretly been rude about me, but I will always have peoples back and when I become a fan of someone or something I will always be unless again I find out they aren’t nice at all and just appearance.
The people I would say are Loyal to me. It would be my friend Hayley whom I have known since I can remember, and we don’t see each other a lot now, do see her as my friend for life and has never turned her back on me and will always have time for.
My Virtue family, who I am so amazed with. I don’t see myself as being anything than a girl who had a different dreams to most on my housing estate I grew up on, and has followed it.
So helpful, so this again is a trait I will alway follow and do wash up, even though this has been questioned. I will open a door for someone, but do want it acknowledge. The people who don’t say thank you when I am helpful not to be anywhere near my life, as for me this shows they have no respect for others and so never have time for people like that.
In terms of someone being helpful is my man and those who I have loved since a kid, like Oprah Winfrey, as her show she did was so successful because it wasn’t all centred around her but other people and not just the rich and famous, and found her show and video content as she does speak now at many Seminars, to be helpful. I saw that this successful woman had been hurt as a kid, didn’t always feel good about herself, and didn’t mind sharing it because she knew that there would be others feeling like that too.
Of course Mrs Hinch for her Activity book which has inspired me to write this post today.
Positive. So yes I have been doing lots of work on that, because I have sometimes been pessimistic and negative at times. I struggled through life some days and I am often anxious, and just now as I continued this blog was feeling anxious and I don’t often know why and I didn’t.
Using Postivity practices like using these tools in her activity book, has helped with that. Giving myself acknowledgement is okay, as I was often left to believe that I was wrong if I ever did that, but now I do.
We can often feel that we are at fault all the time, and there will always be those that can’t wait to have a go at your for something, even if it is breathing, and so being positive about yourself and life, by focusing on what yu bring to the world and life, and doing positive things, like acts of kindness and be helpful and funny.
Tidy. Now I struggle here. I am not always tidy. I hate cleaning and I feel somewhat positive again in be truthful about that. Now please don’t take this as I am untidy and I like mess. NO. I just find it a task to often pick up a cloth and wipe a surface down or vacuum and have the tendency to put it last.
In terms of someone I would be in life with who was tidy, it would be Nigella Lawson’s for her Pantry, have Jamie Oliver’s Kitchen, Carrie Bradshaw’s walk in closet and Jennifer Addison’s Friends Wardrobe and costumes.
Friendly is another trait I have always had and is how I have met a lot of my friends. I meet one of my friend Louise through watching the Rugby team the London Broncos, and I can be someone who shy’s away from people if I don’t know a lot of people and have suffered with Social Anxiety. However I have never allowed this stop me from being friendly and approachable.
I remember being picked on at the Comedy store and so many people were coming up to me afterwards and just chatted to me and it was a night I will always remember as yes I met Lee Mack there and we had a snog, then I got rat arsed like I usually did, sang karoake and how I got home I do not know, but was a bloody good night. If you have never been to somewhere like the Comedy Store then once Lockdown moves on, go.
Silly. Yes I do practice acts of silliness and sometimes like to just be silly even in my blogs, as that is me. I was called weird as a child and yeah I suppose to many I am, but I will always say hello if you are a genuine friendly as above person, and like to use my silliness in my books as I am writing a comedy as we speak and last year when it felt like the world was tumbling down, got up to This Old House by Shaking Stevens and was mucking about and it felt bloody good. Would like to do this again sometime.
So who would I like in my life that is silly. Well again my Love Lee, but also my cat Toby who would attack me regularly. Some are saying its because he saw me as his mother, well if I do start to eat cat food then I might take myself to the vets, especially if I start to jump at someone and attack their feet.
Fun. Well I love having fun, hence why I have written this blog post today. Fun for me is taking the piss out of those who feel it necessary to put my world down, and I am going to once I get the confidence is do dancersize and Boxercise. I just want to get rid of my swollen eye I have at the moment, caused by stress and get up on my feet put on some tunes and WORK IT OUT! YEAH I HEAR YOU SAY. LETS KICK SOME ASS!
Also this blog post has made me come up with a potential heading for one of my books or use it to create a Joke Book.
The person that comes into mind that comes to fun is Davina McCall, as her fitness DVD got me working out at home and now has her own fitness/exercise site called: ownyourgoals site and it has some workouts of hers and other fitness trainers and instructors, and I buy her fitness DVD’s every year. I just need a knew DVD player because my ex would often get rid of things and the XBox that was also a DVD player was replaced by a fifty two inch TV so I couldn’t use them.
So glad that, that is over we were no offence to him, suited at all.
Caring is something again I have just naturally had. I did cry when watching the Film Rocky Two where Silvester Stillion, charactor gets beat and alway sobbed to the book and film “Puff the magic dragon” if anyone can remember those. I wear my heart on my sleeve and never going to apologise for that.
Being Caring is in you and I am glad I am subconciously like that aswell as consciously. For me the person who comes into my mind when it comes to Caring, it has got to be my two Nans. On my dad side and mums, as they help bring me up and I spent a lot of time with them. That is how I would see many of my other relatives and I loved looking out of my nans flat in Doors road as it did have a brilliant view of Southwest and even Central London, and writint this makes me feel patriotic about where I come from. They would always make it an occasion on mine and my cousins birthdays and was my influences in my childhood and growing up.
So famous people it is three. Princess Diana, The Queen and Tony Robbins. I remember as a child I was very much a royalist and Lady Diana before she became a Princess, we used to see going to work when she like me worked in a nursery in South West London, and she would embrace people like no other and broke the barrier between us normal folk which I thought I was back then and being a member of the Royal Family.
Then the Queen also. She followed on the trend from her father giving a speech every Christmas and helped families through the Second world war as many building were bombed down, including where I used to live in Peabody Estate and was a comfort to people in the UK and around the world.
The other is Tony Robbins. This man changed my way of thinking just by one, yes one video and I was hooked. Now someone who I was once with in a relationship, hence why we never worked as I did respect his opinon but why we were so different. He would call it Brain washing. Well dah, no it is not. In fact it is far from it. He just makes you see that you are seeing regret for example a complete fail and I am never going to get my dream, to yeah you can. If you keep seeing failure that is all you will see. However if you say right that didn’t work but this is what I can do next away of moving you away from thinking you have nothing else to live for to yes you have everything to live for.
Then loving. Well again I am a loving person and perhaps too much some time, but seeing life now being in my 40’s it ain’t a bad trait to have and why I have met and come to know so many people because I will talk and listen and take in what people I have come to know say to me. I loved Butlins and the guests, as they would make you feel part of their holiday and that always made my day.
So for me those that have stood out for me in that category is my Aunty and Uncles as always used to on a Saturday as a little girl hope that they would be at my nans when we used to go over to my nan skinner on a Saturday and my mum and dad friends from Chelsea including my mums bestfriend Gill and family as I would stay at their houses with my friend Hayley and her sister. We used to go on Holidays including camping with them and I loved them. Plus all of my cousins even the most annoying ones.
Plus my inlaws from my previous marriage as they still looking out for me and love them still, as they welcomed me so well, and have been very understanding that my first marriage didn’t work out, and still send me messages to say so too, and I love that.
Some more people who I haven’t mention and that is all of my Rugby League friends I came to know as thinking of them even those whom are not part of my life now gave me a lot of memories too and made me feel welcome on my first ever game and that I had been going there for ages and so have to mention my friend’s mum and dad for that Phil and Susan Jones.
So why no do the same and use these words to journal how these words in Mrs Hinch Activity book means to you, and you’ll see that you do have more to life than what you may see.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
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IN THIS BLOG I AM TALKING ABOUT DEALING WITH NEGATIVE FEELINGS AND JEALOUSY WHICH I TALK ABOUT IN THE VIDEO LINKED ABOVE AND IS ONE THAT IS NEGATIVE AND HAS A MASSIVE IMPACT TO YOUR HAPPINESS AND WELLBEING.
People say that Jealousy is healthy and keeps like your spouse on their toes, but being someone who has been targetted by those that have been jealous I disagree. In fact being someone who was once a Jealous person it is not a nice feeling at all, and its like what Mel Robbins says, your basically saying “There isn’t enough of what that person has to go around, and your not worthy of doing that too”.
I was targetted quite badly for someone who felt that way and it was as if I had no rights of a life of many amazing things because they felt they wouldn’t and so why should I. I am going to be blunt here: THAT AIN’T MY FAULT.
I stopped my jealousy by asking myself questions, like: So do I want that person to fail or not have a life? How would I feel if they did that to me? and it has made me address, face and handle.
To get rid of negative feelings including resentment which comes with jealousily and hatred because someone is doing better than you, but you don’t want to feel that way either, Address those feelings by asking questions like above, Face them because if you try to ignore them the stronger those feelinngs can grow within you and handle, so deal with them so they go away from your thoughts and fears.
Now if there is a person who knows you are feeling that way and play on those feelings so a boyfriend purposely kisses someone else in front of you, knowing that you are going to be upset then that is different, and they are doing it to be spiteful and this is where you can say “What was that about and why?” and then walk away unless they follow.
There are people who will play with your insecurities, but this doesn’t make them super confident it means they are insecure more than you, as they think to help them stop feeling like they don’t like themselves aim it at you to make themselves feel superior to you.
Those feelings can have a tendency to rub off on you, and before you know it your doing it.
Fear is often a course of negative feelings, because we fear that if they do well means that it may mean we never will, but anyone can be successful but creating their own work, so not copying and using your own talents and interests for you to have a happy life aswell. Check out video: Finding your Talent.
Example McDonalds and Burger King. So McDonalds was formed in America in the 70’s and was the it fast food restaurtant to go to, and it took over our English version Wimpy, and the guy from McDonalds who was the creator knew that if he could come over to England and open up here aswell as America then it has a good chance to reach other countries.
Then someone who worked at McDonalds wanted to make their own version and build a fastfood Franchise but got jealous of McDonalds rein and even threatened to close McDonalds down as they were told where ever you build your fastfood restaurant we will be there too so you will never be as big.
Yet the top two fastfood outlets in the 90’s were McDonald and Burger King. They were at logger heads all the time, but they both succeeded and both had restaurants all over the world. So there is always enough to go around and still stand out against others who do the same as you, but if you put your own stamp on what you do then you can be as successful.
The other negative feeling is not feeling like you are part of anything. I felt like this for ages and it did get to me. I remember being invited to someone’s anniversary party when I worked in a holiday camp and feeling like would stand out like sore thumb and not really be wanted there, and was only being invited because who I was romantically with.
If you feel like this then ask yourself. Do I have friends that will be there in a shot if they knew I was feeling like this? Do you get on with these people? What I do when I feel this way is say, “Okay it may be that no if I weren’t with a certain person perhaps I wouldn’t be invited but can I change their mind by being happy for an invite and show them that I am worthy of their company?” Yes I can and I did.
There are those who can make you feel inadequate but if I am going to an unfamiliar ground but feel I have to go to someone’s party because at the same time not want to let that person down, is tell yourself like I have “You don’t have to stay and there is always a door you can walk out of”.
I have suffered with social anxiety because I have been with people in a romantic way and have been cheated on and that can hit you like a knife but because I knew the relationship was over did like above, Addressed, Faced and Handled and then I was like “Okay that is fine, I did fight for it but now know it is time to walk away” and you can tell yourself that as human nature intended to listen to your gut instinct if it is good or bad to stay or go, it will let you know.
Another negative feeling is towards yourself. Not able to look in the mirro and I get this alot and hve been like it since I was a kid. Sometimes the image of myself in my head was different to what I saw in the mirror and so have a notepad and write down the things you do like about yourself.
We can be harder to ourselves than to other people and we all have a uniqueness and qualities and so go through it and if you say “There’s nothing that I like” then ask a friend to do this for you and have them read it out to you. You’ll be surprised as to what they see that you don’t about yourself.
Try and do something differet each day. So two night ago I decided to introduce a new item into my routine and that is choose a song a day and put it on Twitter and it will be a song that has been part of my life and I did this as it gives me a lift and reaches to those too who need that.
I also in one of my journals write a wish a day or a few and it is helping me feel better as this week I have been a bit run down and so it is good to find these little things that stops my negative thoughts and feelings and make each day count.
So I hope that this blog has helped you and see you in another one.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: All my blogs and videos will be uploaded to my site:
Now I know if you see the heading you may think I am going to hit you over the head with the Bible and may be uncomfortable able spirituality and certain beliefs. That is fine, I am not saying this is for everyone, but those that do and how it can help them to have more empowerment in their life if they aren’t able to get it from another source.
Spiritualiy is personal and a feeling within yourself and some cut it off knowing it is there and some use it help them drive them forward, and for me it has.
How as it helped me in my life?
Well it made me see that some of the things I asked for, for people to see the goodness in me and that even though I know I am not perfect that I am real and a young kid who has had super ambition, has happened. That I do have an inner strength, which helped me through last year when life was terrible in parts.
It could be mocked a lot, but with prayer and learning from parts of the Bible as I don’t believe in all of it, has helped me as a person and seen what my purpose is that I often used to question and has guided me this far.
I don’t read the Bible everyday and in fact it has been a very long time since I did, and have used other books to help me find my way, but I know it is there if I do want to read it.
Check out my New Weekend chat video where I talk about Religion and Do I believe in the Bible (see below):
I no longer want to be part of the Church of England and be a Catholic as the church of England misrepresent it, and feel strongly that Catholic church is for me, and fits well.
I didn’t at one time because of its belief of Abortion, but that is not true.
Do I think people are wrong in having no spiritual beliefs?
No! It is up to you and you make the choice and that is fine. Not everyone was put on this planet to believe in it, and so, it is a personal preference.
I like to pray sometimes and talk to God but I do it privately away from other people, but share it to those who are interested.
It has been through spirituality that I have maintained my belief in true love and connection. I have that now and one part of my life that is going in the right direction, aswell as my writing. It has made me see I am a maker of many things, and can accomplish whatever I want by shear determination that I didn’t at one time felt I had.
You are the founder of your own earth, and that means you are in charge of your life and choices, but if you did need a bit of direction then praying or just sitting quietly asking for help, can help and has helped me.
I no there are those who use religion to hurt people and can use it be evil and even though it says there is no hell or devil, I see it is that those who do that, are the devil not someone necessarily with horns and is based in the hole in the earth. I think that is why I am not overly religious as I see that as a danger zone being that those who do harm people because of they’re super religious give others who don’t a bad name and reputer.
I used to make spiritual goals, but I feel that I have reached them and don’t have any others at the moment but are good to set and can help with self development and personal growth.
One thing this Pandemic has done is shown the kindness of so many people and what you can do still even with Lockdown and Social Distancing how you can still reach out to people.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: Check out all my blogposts on this site by following me and I also add blogs to these sites too:
So the one thing I have talked about in one of my videos is about Habits, and I have added few new Habits into my life now that I have done and they have just blended into my daily routine and helps shape my days.
The one thing I have is a daily routine.
Yes it does pay to be flexible on some days, but it also is good to have structure and shapes the day out for me so I know what I planned for each day and make sure I give myself breaks and I spend each day in the mornings writing in my journal.
I don’t always get up at the same time but I do have a cut off time of when I can stay in bed till and that is no later than midday, 12noon. I will also keep track of blogs scheduled that have been written and then scheduled to go live.
The same with Youtube videos.
I live by lists and have a notebook which I live in (see blog post with video about this below) as sticking with one notebook for organizing your daily work is the key to staying on track, and I will often sit down each day and go through what I have done.
I will even keep a list of blog ideas that come into my head and videos to film. A list for me isn’t a to do as then it is seen from my eyes as a chore, so I see it as a goals list as this helps me make sure it is done.
Having a daily clear out
As I have a laptop now and doesn’t have the same amount of storage as a computer I will go through my files on my laptop, to go through images and video content I don’t need to keep and delete items, making space for more videos to be done and photos to be saved.
I have a day where I will use to organize my desk and make it tidy each week and keep my room clean. I will clear out at the end of each day my emails and then list what is scheduled for the next day.
My cleaning day is usually Thursday and I have selected this day as I don’t do a Day In A Life on this day, so is free and helps re-organize and have some order for the rest of the week.
I am not a lover of cleaning and so schedule it in to make sure it does get done is the way forward for me.
Have a few days off to recuperate and catch up
When doing this it helps me to stay on track and catch up with my work and have some days off, like this week I didn’t film any Day In a life so I could catch up on the ones I have filmed but yet to be uploaded and this then makes space for me to film more.
I feel that I have to take that break to reset myself and do other things that are important that need to get done. Life is about variety and as human beings we all need that type of rest.
Food should be a hug on a plate or in a bowl and having food you enjoy is good for your wellbeing. To much of it though you can become sick of it, but having food that comforts you, is fine. Create yourself a weekly menu of meals to make and this can help you use up food you already have and make meal times fun.
Reading a good book
Find refuge in a good book can do wonders and I find self help books are a comfort along with Chick flick books such as Bridget Jones and I used to love reading Lena Kennedy. Her books were based on on the 1940s of ladies living in the streets of London.
A good book is something that makes you look forward to picking it up, and can be picked up and put down without losing where you left the story. I love reading about other people’s lives and so I do read an Autobiography aswell as fiction and I find these help give me direction and help me tell my own story.
Book are works of art in words and a good book is one that leaves an everlasting thought and you wanting more. I am so glad I was given the gift of writing as I too have books out and very proud of them. (See Amazon.com), they are under the name Carrie Challoner.
Keeping happy memories in a folder and using greeting cards as pages
I have a small blue folder from Rymans and I use this to store various photos of when I did dancing and holidays and days at school. This folder I love to look at and it stores a lot of memories that I want to keep hold of and love looking through this from time to time and will be putting more of these together.
It keep those greeting cards that you don’t want to get rid of and recycle to add photos onto the back or inside the cards.
The other reason I want to do this along with photo books and scrapbooks I put together is so they can be passed down to my kids to their kids one day.
Choose a song or a play list that helps you get out of the bed in the mornings
Every morning without fail I will put on some music and I have in my Life Coaching video list spoken in one how the Power of music has become my life, giving me empowerment and told my life story.
I even have different playlists and going to make a few more playlists of songs that wake me up in the mornings and are easy to listen too.
A Safe Haven in your home or outdoors
So this can be anywhere in your home or outdoors and I am going to create this as soon as I have my own place again. I want to create a room and have a park I go to where I have no TV, but I can listen to music, journal, just sit quietly with my thoughts or read a book.
If it is in a room of your house, you can make it just your space and design it with plants and a scented candle to let the people know who you are living with that you are in there and do not want to be disturbed and having them see or smell a certain scent tell them this, so they can join you in being quiet and be a great place to have a natter or just be by yourself for a bit.
So make each day count for you and there is no time like the present to do this then now, as we are still in Lockdown and Stay Safe, Stay Strong.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: All my life coaching content is uploaded to be Pinterest board, my Facebook group and my Blog Network: