Commenting on someones weight, commenting on somebody’s life and commenting on someones dreams.
Has this been you? I hate those who judge other people and I have caught myself from doing so and it is “Who are you to judge?” it is not up to me and people say “Yeah in an ideal world” but do you have to judge other people? Getting to know people, yes, listening to people, yes and seeing the big picture of what is truly going on in someones life, yes.
There is a 10 commardment of don’t judge those on how you wouldn’t like them to judge you.
Yet people still do it and it seeing it, it’s their actual problem not the person they are judging and in some way they get satisfaction from that.
It is often because it feels good to throw a hurt at someone when it goes for those that judge and making assumptions about people yet they haven’t given that person a chance to be heard yet they expect others just be quiet and its looking down on people for no real reason.
There are people who don’t like my approach in being laid back and flexible, but I have seen better things in doing so and I am a open minded person which gets judged a lot of too.
I am not someone who follows always on how someone else lives but I set standards for myself as I can says I don’t know everything yet in some peoples mind it is “Well you should?” There are things that I am good at like writing and the feedback has been an eye opener and I know that my words are doing more than just words but they do have meaning and when began blogging had no idea of whow they would be received.
So, for me it is:
Get to know that peron who you see. I always go on if they are good and lovely for real its when you actually meet them that counts and you can tell from 5 words if they are really a nice person or not and their body language too.
If you feel that you have been judged then ask them “Why are you judging me?” and be open to then give then a sense of control still but make it clear you have boundaries and you don’t like to be judged and you’ll find if you do it, they are the ones who will begin screaming and shouting.
So look after yourself and #BeKind to yourself too.
Hello and welcome! In this blog post I am talking about Personal Development and have a strategy to your life.
So what is Personal Development?
Well it is anything to self care to self help and getting a balanced life that can lower the stress and create more abundance and power to your life.
It has taken me years to get to know myself and often I didn’t like being me. I had to get over that as I didn’t want to pass these insecurities to the my son or too any other children I have looked after since a kid myself.
I never want my son to not like himself and be proud of who he is and that means seeing the good things about me and I now practice Affirmations that are important to me and how to feel good about myself.
I am not saying this works for all but it can help.
So get a notebook and write down quotes that tell you about you, and imagine yourself looking at you and find quotes to write down that can tell you about yourself, and I put down “I am worth more” or “I am own teacher so be kind to myself”.
I myself will look in the mirror of myself and say things lik “Thats not me not the girl I see in my head” so I wil argue “What is really wrong, does matter if I am different so be it”. I have learned that it is good to be different. The world doesn’t need 15 people all being the same so why should we try? I seen that everyone is unique and we all capable building our life out to then teach others, and that is always what I think about when I feel insecure now.
I think of the implacations it can have and so I have a Strategy now where by I will go through to acknowledge it and then push them away.
A Strategy is where you have way of gaining control over how you feel about yourself when it comes to personal development and make a promise to yourself and give yourself some care and time to learn about life and on yourself.
Its all about be in charge of your thoughts and fears so they don’t take over.
I also write other blogs and have a Youtube channel so why not check this out here:
Here is a printable of what you can do to take time for yourself. it is so important to do things just for you, so we can continue the day unscathed. This is on A4 but you can change that and I hope you find it useful. This for you Happy Journal that you can put together.
I have now finished my life coaching course, so if you wish to check this out then click here:
It is important you take that time and be with your own thoughts and one thing I like to do is reflect sometimes on what I have done, and what stood out for me that week or on the day.
We all need downtime and so make sure when you schedule your days you take that quality time on yourself.
Hello and welcome to a new blog post, where i will be sharing some Life coaching strategies and about never compare yourself. We are all different as the world would be a boring place if we weren’t yet we easily compare ourselves to others, as we feel that they have more of a life than you. Well so it seems, but does it get anywhere? No!
I am in a place where I can say I’m finally happy to be me, I don’t want to be a envious or jealous girl I once was, because I find those feelings limiting your self belief. There isn’t enough of someones success to go round.
I was always comparing myself cause I felt you had to be a super human to have a nice home, to be able to work for yourself and that I would never be someone who could buy a new home that I can call mine.
Now I know that is not the case and I do have my own money now and I am not in the need of cash as now I am earning my own money and it has kept me in a good mindset, and has helped me land on my feet. I idolise people like Jennifer Aniston, as she is my fashion icon and I love her character in friends and what she also wears in the show as Rachel Green. I do style myself not to copy but in admiration of her and it that helps as I do like to make an effort on some days in terms of clothes, hair and make up and that gives me a reason to get out of bed for, but to compare, she isn’t me she is her and I would never think of being her as she is her own person,, but I admire cause I think could I wear that what look coiuld I do that would make me feel good about mysefl?
Once you start to compare yourself you find that the ehtusiasm to find you fades and stop you from getting out of bed, so take five minute writing about you and what you are about, not comparing and forget those cause they are never gonna be you, and you are never gonna be them, and it can make you miserable even by trying. So it is important to find out who you are.
So never compare and be you, as you will be surprised once you think about you rather than someone else what qualities you find that you have.
So, in this Weekly blog post, I am sharing some tips on Building Success from easter to Autumn. If you would like to checkout my new EBooks then please go to: Amazon.com and look under the name Carrie Lee Holmes.
So my first Tip# Is to go through you calendar of important dates. Go through birthdays and anniversaries, and how you can use them in your work or work around them. If there are birthdays or anniversaries that you can’t attend, of who may have sent out invitations to you, but still send them a message via social media or a card still. If you need like I do to shut yourself away to work on an online course or a book, do it, and set a date for yourself and many do a Writing Retreat.
Tip 2# Go through the summer months of taking your work outside, and make your work more personal to the people you are trying to attract. People like those who create products that solves a problem in everyday things, like, How to save money on energy in the home that you can save for your business.
I am all for working and saving at the sametime and that is now, why I am financially secure, because I have created a passive income with solid income and that means having weeks where I will work Rock solid and then take time out. Those who are earning a lot of money, know it when they no longer have to work everyday or can take it easy and can have more holidays. I know with Lockdown it has not been possible, but I do have some holidays booked and really looking forward to them
Tip 3# Use Easter to separate your work and finance as a new quarter, so like from Jan to March is one quarter, April to July or June the second and July to September is the third and October to December the last quarter. Honestly, it makes work so much easier.
I was someone who worked month to month at one time, but it never worked for me, and I have set goals for this month April 2021, but I have done it so I can work through them, through the other months.
Tip 4# Don’t jam pack your day with loads of meetings and tasks. I like to spread things out in the week, and would book meetings in the morning so I have my afternoons and evenings, to myself to do whatever I choose. I do have a day in the week where I don’t write blogs to go live or post any at all, and that is Sunday.
So go through your week and things you may have already booked and, then see where there is space to have an Admin day, a no meeting day or a day of doing research.
Rip 5# Use the sunmmer holidays as the time to plan the next quarters and keep setting goals. A lot of people think goal setting should be at the beginning of the year, but plan them all year round.
Hello and welcome! Here is a new blog post which is going to be added to my Life Coaching Programme “Project 2021”, and this is about Get Your Life Together, so time to start making changes so you are happier and have more to your life than being confined to four walls.
Before continuing on please see my Life coaching videos I have created for this #lifecoaching programme via this link:
One of my favourite places I love to go and soon will be moving near here and can’t wait. Its good to have places that makes you happy and fulfilled aswell as people. This is in St James Park, Central London
Not too late to make Life changes, as it is March but so what, you can make life changes all year round, and You don’t need the New Year to do it.
So my routine is one that has helped me to get enough sleep but still even with a small amount of time there is left in the day I still get stuff done. The point of working for yourself is to give yourself time to rest and recuperate and spend time on not the “Got To List” to the “What I want to do list”.
Set challenges for yourself. I do this a lot and it helps me to have a good balance, and so I tend to do this with money and see when I go grocery shopping of how much I can get under £20 and that has at the minute been my budget and use what I have, so I have not had to spend money on food for the last 3 weeks and trust me makes huge difference and when I am with my new family soon, be doing the same. Now when I move into my new home I will be increasing my budget but still be seeing where and how I can save money still. Just because you are financially secure that its an excuse to flush down to the toilet, but invest wisely.
Now I am someone that when I do sleep in I do have that “Waste of a day” guilt when it doesn’t matter what time you get up but What You Want to Get out of the Day. So the Life change I have started to apply is to Stop self punishment, as I have been so unkind to myself, that if that was someone else saying those things to me, I would tell them to leave alone and go away, so yes, #BeKind to yourself, have #selfrespect
I think we get so stuck on the New Year when it comes to making changes in our lives and feel some kind of New Year Pressure, and why we can fall, and not complete our resolutions, but I never make these, being someone who fell too. Never see it as failure as that is not right its because we are seeing a resolution being a one time thing, and not something that is long standing, so scrap resolutions and make a list of the thing you love and how wish to grow in the next years coming up. One way is to create a Career Tree, see below and an example of the one I have done, and I will add this to my Content Creators Planner I am putting together, so keep posted on details on this.
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I have done a Printable of the details of how to create a Career Tree and how it works.
So to get back on track if you have lost your way a bit, that can happen sit down and spend time making notes and go through by keeping a journal which I use everyday to help find why your plans for this year have stopped as you can always get back into it.
Spring is a perfect time to make changes if not in the New Year, as that is when crops start to grow, animals come out of hibernation and give birth, and we have longer days and so don’t worry if it is passed the new year, You can’t still make a change.
Have a Pjama day. I spend my Sundays in my sweats which are also my night clothes, and it is really nice to have a day where I don’t feel I need make up, but sometimes I will and use it as my Admin Free Choice Day and I think this has been something I have done religiously going on the bible not never thought of it that way. I am a kid who on Sunday’s it was a day of a lot of shops would be closed except pubs and some restaurants and so would use this day to go and see my friends in Chelsea, watch my brother play football, play pitch ‘n’ putt at Bishops park, ride our bikes along the river and often BBC 2 would put on some old black and white films I loved and football.
So have a day where you can just do what you enjoy and some people I know don’t even get out our bed and still do work, but in bed, and when I am in my new home, very soon being doing this again too.
I also have days where I will eat something different and there is a wonderful Comedian who I do know so well “My Love” who does this, “something different on tour or on holiday that you wouldn’t have at home” and watching a documentary of this wonderful human being, I do too. ALWAYS! Why not? YOUR ARE ON HOLIDAY SO DO WHAT YOU LIKE AND as long AS noone is at harm, MAKE HOLIDAY TIME TO BE DIFFERENT TO EVERYDAY!
Then the other things is creating a good fitness routine which is a very common promise that people make to themselves including me and i am putting a new site together so I will keep you posted on this, but if you find working out hard just do it once a week, exercise whilst waiting for breakfast to cook or whilst the kettle boils. You can fit it in but Inyour own schedule not by somebodies elses, which is a common mistake.
Also to keep you fitness going each year introduce something new, to your regieme and fit in regular walking, as this is easy to do and easier to fit in and stick too. I also love doing dance workouts and boxercise exercises.
So do what you know you can stick to and if you would like to use my Goals list to set your Life changes you’d like to make then please check out my goal sheet I have created.
What you can do if you don’t want to set yearly goals set some for the day, week and month and I go through mine each month and with a vision board see my last post Creating a Vision board see if any of them have changed and often through the year update them and change, as often you can go in a different direction than the start of the year, so life is always revolving and I do live seasonally and change my life habits sometimes. There is always room in a year to start a fresh and using the different seasons in the year is a way of doing so. It is all about being current and being you still, but growing.
Here is a copy of my goals for this year on my Pinterest vision board for 2021:
So I hope you had a good week so far and see you in the next blog.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: All my blog posts and Life coaching videos can be found on pinterest site above and on my network site:
In this blog post I am talking about Managing the mind as when we feel self concious it can stop us from achieving the things we want and often reach a full stop, not knowing where we want to go next.
So it is important we look after our minds and take time to deal with critters that creep in and stop you in your tracks. So the first tip is to,
talk to them in you mind.
So sounds a bit mad, but that’s just me. I say to mine “No I will go for a run, or I will fit in a workout indoors”. Having a secret mindful conversation with the inner critic can deal with head on and stop it from controlling what you to and stop you.
Drink something that makes you excel and breath.
I don’t function with my morning cup of tea and coffee, and it just gives me time to breath and focus on my cuppa and be with the world at the same time.
Find a therapy
So this could be Talking to someone, listening to music or reading a book even. Many people even use exercise like Yoga, as it helps you to get in touch with your body and helps you switch off and feel peaceful and calm
Clear Daily cobwebs away
So walking is what helps me with this and so does writing and listening to music as mentioned above, but also I have gotten into the habit of writing in my journal without fail everyday.
I also have been on twitter choosing a song a day that has been part of my life and why I love the song. I also write in another planner/journal of a wish or wishes
Find Stability in your life
So I have a new love in my life. Someone I have known for a long time and they give me stability and I have that part of my life sealed and desperate to see, as we haven’t been able to alot because of COVID. Stabilty can even be delegating jobs. Stop trying to do so much
Have Flexibility in your life
So what do I mean. I don’t always have things set in stone in fact I like to vary the things I do each day, and be ready for any last minute events. This helps stop repetition and becoming bogged down.
Embrace life and people
If you embrace life more, the more of a good life you will lead and this is because you aren’t allowing challenges to prevent you from having a good life with as mentioned above stability and welcoming new things that come into your life and meeting new people.
Leave out the old and live in the new
Words from a song by Dina Carrol “A Perfect Year” Written by Sir Andrew Lloyd-Webber and Sir Tim Rice.
So what do those words mean, well leave the old so the past and focus on a new, the new year. I have been someone who would dwell on the passed events in my life good and bad, and all the things that have taunted and haunted me, but looking back and focusing on good memories, my life wasn’t that bad I just needed to be with the right people, and to have a better life you do need to let many things go.
So be good to yourself. Leave the criter and be you. There are some great mind managing tips on this site: https://www.mind.org.uk/
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: All my blogs and video content will be posted on my network site:
IN THIS BLOG I AM TALKING ABOUT DEALING WITH NEGATIVE FEELINGS AND JEALOUSY WHICH I TALK ABOUT IN THE VIDEO LINKED ABOVE AND IS ONE THAT IS NEGATIVE AND HAS A MASSIVE IMPACT TO YOUR HAPPINESS AND WELLBEING.
People say that Jealousy is healthy and keeps like your spouse on their toes, but being someone who has been targetted by those that have been jealous I disagree. In fact being someone who was once a Jealous person it is not a nice feeling at all, and its like what Mel Robbins says, your basically saying “There isn’t enough of what that person has to go around, and your not worthy of doing that too”.
I was targetted quite badly for someone who felt that way and it was as if I had no rights of a life of many amazing things because they felt they wouldn’t and so why should I. I am going to be blunt here: THAT AIN’T MY FAULT.
I stopped my jealousy by asking myself questions, like: So do I want that person to fail or not have a life? How would I feel if they did that to me? and it has made me address, face and handle.
To get rid of negative feelings including resentment which comes with jealousily and hatred because someone is doing better than you, but you don’t want to feel that way either, Address those feelings by asking questions like above, Face them because if you try to ignore them the stronger those feelinngs can grow within you and handle, so deal with them so they go away from your thoughts and fears.
Now if there is a person who knows you are feeling that way and play on those feelings so a boyfriend purposely kisses someone else in front of you, knowing that you are going to be upset then that is different, and they are doing it to be spiteful and this is where you can say “What was that about and why?” and then walk away unless they follow.
There are people who will play with your insecurities, but this doesn’t make them super confident it means they are insecure more than you, as they think to help them stop feeling like they don’t like themselves aim it at you to make themselves feel superior to you.
Those feelings can have a tendency to rub off on you, and before you know it your doing it.
Fear is often a course of negative feelings, because we fear that if they do well means that it may mean we never will, but anyone can be successful but creating their own work, so not copying and using your own talents and interests for you to have a happy life aswell. Check out video: Finding your Talent.
Example McDonalds and Burger King. So McDonalds was formed in America in the 70’s and was the it fast food restaurtant to go to, and it took over our English version Wimpy, and the guy from McDonalds who was the creator knew that if he could come over to England and open up here aswell as America then it has a good chance to reach other countries.
Then someone who worked at McDonalds wanted to make their own version and build a fastfood Franchise but got jealous of McDonalds rein and even threatened to close McDonalds down as they were told where ever you build your fastfood restaurant we will be there too so you will never be as big.
Yet the top two fastfood outlets in the 90’s were McDonald and Burger King. They were at logger heads all the time, but they both succeeded and both had restaurants all over the world. So there is always enough to go around and still stand out against others who do the same as you, but if you put your own stamp on what you do then you can be as successful.
The other negative feeling is not feeling like you are part of anything. I felt like this for ages and it did get to me. I remember being invited to someone’s anniversary party when I worked in a holiday camp and feeling like would stand out like sore thumb and not really be wanted there, and was only being invited because who I was romantically with.
If you feel like this then ask yourself. Do I have friends that will be there in a shot if they knew I was feeling like this? Do you get on with these people? What I do when I feel this way is say, “Okay it may be that no if I weren’t with a certain person perhaps I wouldn’t be invited but can I change their mind by being happy for an invite and show them that I am worthy of their company?” Yes I can and I did.
There are those who can make you feel inadequate but if I am going to an unfamiliar ground but feel I have to go to someone’s party because at the same time not want to let that person down, is tell yourself like I have “You don’t have to stay and there is always a door you can walk out of”.
I have suffered with social anxiety because I have been with people in a romantic way and have been cheated on and that can hit you like a knife but because I knew the relationship was over did like above, Addressed, Faced and Handled and then I was like “Okay that is fine, I did fight for it but now know it is time to walk away” and you can tell yourself that as human nature intended to listen to your gut instinct if it is good or bad to stay or go, it will let you know.
Another negative feeling is towards yourself. Not able to look in the mirro and I get this alot and hve been like it since I was a kid. Sometimes the image of myself in my head was different to what I saw in the mirror and so have a notepad and write down the things you do like about yourself.
We can be harder to ourselves than to other people and we all have a uniqueness and qualities and so go through it and if you say “There’s nothing that I like” then ask a friend to do this for you and have them read it out to you. You’ll be surprised as to what they see that you don’t about yourself.
Feeling ugly is hard hitting and so have a day where you pamper yourself, or do something that makes you feel good. I find having a skincare routine can help and I have done a video talking about what I keep in make up bag and current skincare products I use.
Try and do something differet each day. So two night ago I decided to introduce a new item into my routine and that is choose a song a day and put it on Twitter and it will be a song that has been part of my life and I did this as it gives me a lift and reaches to those too who need that.
I also in one of my journals write a wish a day or a few and it is helping me feel better as this week I have been a bit run down and so it is good to find these little things that stops my negative thoughts and feelings and make each day count.
So I hope that this blog has helped you and see you in another one.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: All my blogs and videos will be uploaded to my site:
So in this post I am talking about Extreme Youtubing, and the extent that People will go to, to create content and I came across a video about How to put on your Video and Skype Call face on. This is after a I did a video about not exploiting or trying to out do someone and showing your body to the world and people getting the wrong idea of things.
Please watch this video:
Most of the time when we are video or skype calling in our own homes, its with our mates and I don’t see someone saying “Don’t call me via Video or Skype, I want you to put your video and Skype call face on first”.
If someone had ever said that to me I would not call them fall stop, and leave them to chat with themselves. I think that this shows how many people worry about appearances too much, as that is not important. I would not stop talking to someone because they have decided to have a no make up day.
I suppose you are wondering why this has any relevance to Life Coaching, well basically when we feel we are’t having a fulfilled life we can blame ourselves because of the way we look and feel ashamed of ourselves.
Let me tell you from someone who doesn’t always like to look in the mirror, appearances are not important but being human is and as long as you show love and compation then appearance is at the bottom of the list and its your personality that will shine through.
So Look after yourself, be true, be strong and never allow anyone stop you for wanting a better and happier life.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie (L.M) X
P.S: All my blogs and videos for my Life Coaching programme, “Project 2021” can be found via my Pinterest and my Squarespace site:
Hello, it is Christmas Eve and wanted to get in another post on this site before Christmas day. I am somewhat prepared for the festive day of cheer. Still got my gifts to wrap up, but I am in the mindset this year of, it will get done, I just want to do it when I know I have one day left, or I may wrap a few today, but have decided to be more laid back about it this year.
At the end of the day will I be remembered for my gift wrapping?
You’ll never see on someone’s grave saying “She was a great person and knew just how to wrap gifts for Christmas”, it is something that we feel abliged to do, yet all that happens is that they will rip the gift wrap off, as with children especially, and just want to know what is in side the packaging, not what is on the outside.
I saw in I think it was in a Paul McKenna’s books, as he has written so many and asked “How would you like to be remembered?”. For me I want people to say I was loyal, kind heartened, once she was fan of something she was a fan for life and no matter what hurdles I had to face, in my life I was determind and never gave up, and faught back.
If you could write a letter to your younger self what would you say?
This is something that you should do often and compare letters to keep track of your life and remember that young girl who had a whole life ahead of you, as you still do.
It can make you take note of what you have achieved at that there were good times and if there is anything you would have changed.
For myself stop believing in Omens, because I moved to Epsom and thought seeing a cat that looked like my cat called Toby was an Omen to say to live there, yet I wish I hadn’t and believe in my gut instinct and live in London again.
Not to have left Butlins as I wanted to be a Red Coat and did often apply but then left in 2005 when I accepted that, that would never happen.
Do I believe that everything happens for a reason?
Not really I just think there are many paths that you take and you don’t have no idea of which path will lead to where but you get lead by hungar to have new chapters in your life, to be closer to people that are important to you, and as written in one of my other blogsites, relationships can change and you then can divert towards another route because it seems to be better than the other paths you’ve taken.
I think that you are influenced often by those that seem to be on your side, but like in the Film about the band Queen, Bohemium Rhapsody, where he trusts this guy who is in love with Freddy Mercury only to find he was a bad apple and was in on for himself.
These kind of people can cause you to have your guard up and become very weary of people. This year I have experienced this a lot, and I have broken my heart a lot through this year, that I can never get back but it has made me see who my real family and friends are.
Do I believe in new beginnings?
Yes I do, and that it never to late to start a new beginning. I never what to live in misery and that those that try to destroy you are just doing it, because they really are the ones that are very insecure. They just want to hit out at the closest person, and use everything against you.
Everyone has the right as we share this world we live in and so we should make room for other people who want happiness too.
If you are unhappy in a situation then it means you need to make a change to destroy that elephant in the room. Noone I believe wants to be unhappy I think we all strive to be happy, but some go the wrong way about it.
They believe if they hurt someone it will make them feel better and being horrible means that you are strong and noone can compete with you.
Yet as soon as you are horrible back they runaway like a little mouse.
So write down how you would like to be remembered for and what you would say to your younger self, that will help as you begin to continue with achieving success and happiness in your life, and remember goals can be set at anytime not just when we are in a new year.
Have a Merry Christmas and A Wonderful new year, but I will be posting more as we close this year down.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie (L.M) X
If you would like to read more of my blog posts then please check out Carries Blog Network:
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