Life can be too much, and I know “Stating the obvious” but we need balance and stability in our life. Yet it can be hard to come by at times and I find when I am near my menstrual cycle I am super stressed and lethargic.
I am so focused on my writing that I forget to give myself time to rest and recuperate. So now I am going to slow down my work by posting a blog a day at a time, than rather doing too many.
So Good practices to help you to have a stressed free day:
Having a good hearty breakfast and have time to yourself to shower and get ready for the day
Text a friend to meet up and have some BFF time and have a catch up
Take time in your day when you schedule to read a book or listen to a good podcast
Watch a documentary, I love these videos as I find it refreshing in a way and inspiring
Make sure you don’t over work by taking substantial breaks from it and organize a space to do other things
Make everyday count, and set yourself goals one day at a time too
Look forward to better days and have pampering hours, where you get your hair done and make up and paint your nails anything that helps you have a happier less stressful day
I never overshadow the struggles in my life and I have talked about them in books and blog posts, and I like to create a true picture. There was a time whereby my work wasn’t being respected, yet I never disrespected anyones work. I was in an unhappy marriage, and many people took sides, and I also found out more of what the person I was married to was doing. I have had a lot chucked at me, but I am still standing.
I never thought I’d be in a position where I’d needed to fight as much as i have and it really took its toll at one point, where I was super stressed and last year I was a totally different me, to the point now I ask myself “How the hell did I get through that?” but I did.
When it comes to Real life of a working mother, you get a lot of judgement. People who don’t want to support you, want to shame you instead, and I see it a lot, If people have their own view on life, but why do we feel the need to put someone elses parenting skills down. I ask the questions, “Does the kid look healthy? Do they laugh and have fun a lot? Do they look like the world is on their shoulders? Honestly, with kids you’ll soon know.
I did write a new blog on a new site I have created called In A Life of a writer, and I will be sharing my life of an author of many Books, and reallife picture of being a Mummy blogger.
There are people who don’t like the word #blogger, but I don’t mind it at all. I mean that is what we are doing, Writing blogs so why not be called a “Blogger”?
Yesterday when I began this blog, and was filming a Get Ready with me video, my son came up and said hello, and had a piece of chocolate and went to have a pooh, yes sorry for putting you off your Sugar Puffs, and telling the world that he was Farting. That is little boys for you, and cause he had, had some chocolate there was a chance I’d end up with chocolaty fingers all over a new dress I was wearing.
So that is real life and why cover it over, when I am sure, people can relate to it.
Hello and welcome! So it is Monday once again and for me it means new goals to set and many more days doing the things I love and hopefully soon being in my own home again.
If you would like to see my recent Life Coaching videos and blogposts then please see my Facebook Group page that you can join, to see them and use the Life coaching tips I share so you can have a better life and a better year:
It doesn’t have to be a drastic change just something that adds Value to your day, and gives you a purpose to get up in the morning and gives you joy. I am all about the Self care and love now, as I could be very critical about myself and it would be a viscious cycle and you end up being so drained of putting yourself down, that even you want to tell your critic self to shut up.
A habit is a ritual, and I know we have been restricted with Lockdown but we can still function if we just take care to put on some Make up, take a bath and listening to chill out mindful music and light a scented candle. Or have a glass of wine whilst taking a bath. I think we have been fed too much about diet and what is good for our bodies and what isn’t. My grandad smoked all his life yet he died old age, and he had been in a middle a war literally so I know smoking isn’t a good habit, but in the end when he couldn’t go out that much having parkinson’s disease, it was the one thing he still had that he enjoyed. Why take that away?
I don’t smoke but I do like a drink every now and again, and it was the one thing I have never felt guilty about, as I was always feeling guilty and often I would question, WHY AM I FULL OF GUILT? Often this feeling in bred into you, and I avoid emotional blackmail, as to me it is a no no.
Life isn’t about scoring points, playing games. It is living the life you have always dreamed of, being near those who are like minded and want to do positive things, even when you have those who want to shut you down. It’s your life and we all have to share this earth so I am all for LETTING PEOPLE LIVE HOW THEY WISH, NOT HURTING OR USING SOMEONE AS A VERBAL PUNCH BAG OR AN EXCUSE TO BE UNKIND!
As we are in a Pandemic a good habit is by doing and “Act of Kindness” like baking a cake for a neighbour, offering to clean your mums car or send them an E-Card. It is something I have always done and is one of the reasons why I create these posts, not to get pity or to drag on about not being confident, but to use to inspire and bring hope to people that may be feeling low because they can’t see love ones and want a change of scene.
IN THIS BLOG I AM TALKING ABOUT DEALING WITH NEGATIVE FEELINGS AND JEALOUSY WHICH I TALK ABOUT IN THE VIDEO LINKED ABOVE AND IS ONE THAT IS NEGATIVE AND HAS A MASSIVE IMPACT TO YOUR HAPPINESS AND WELLBEING.
People say that Jealousy is healthy and keeps like your spouse on their toes, but being someone who has been targetted by those that have been jealous I disagree. In fact being someone who was once a Jealous person it is not a nice feeling at all, and its like what Mel Robbins says, your basically saying “There isn’t enough of what that person has to go around, and your not worthy of doing that too”.
I was targetted quite badly for someone who felt that way and it was as if I had no rights of a life of many amazing things because they felt they wouldn’t and so why should I. I am going to be blunt here: THAT AIN’T MY FAULT.
I stopped my jealousy by asking myself questions, like: So do I want that person to fail or not have a life? How would I feel if they did that to me? and it has made me address, face and handle.
To get rid of negative feelings including resentment which comes with jealousily and hatred because someone is doing better than you, but you don’t want to feel that way either, Address those feelings by asking questions like above, Face them because if you try to ignore them the stronger those feelinngs can grow within you and handle, so deal with them so they go away from your thoughts and fears.
Now if there is a person who knows you are feeling that way and play on those feelings so a boyfriend purposely kisses someone else in front of you, knowing that you are going to be upset then that is different, and they are doing it to be spiteful and this is where you can say “What was that about and why?” and then walk away unless they follow.
There are people who will play with your insecurities, but this doesn’t make them super confident it means they are insecure more than you, as they think to help them stop feeling like they don’t like themselves aim it at you to make themselves feel superior to you.
Those feelings can have a tendency to rub off on you, and before you know it your doing it.
Fear is often a course of negative feelings, because we fear that if they do well means that it may mean we never will, but anyone can be successful but creating their own work, so not copying and using your own talents and interests for you to have a happy life aswell. Check out video: Finding your Talent.
Example McDonalds and Burger King. So McDonalds was formed in America in the 70’s and was the it fast food restaurtant to go to, and it took over our English version Wimpy, and the guy from McDonalds who was the creator knew that if he could come over to England and open up here aswell as America then it has a good chance to reach other countries.
Then someone who worked at McDonalds wanted to make their own version and build a fastfood Franchise but got jealous of McDonalds rein and even threatened to close McDonalds down as they were told where ever you build your fastfood restaurant we will be there too so you will never be as big.
Yet the top two fastfood outlets in the 90’s were McDonald and Burger King. They were at logger heads all the time, but they both succeeded and both had restaurants all over the world. So there is always enough to go around and still stand out against others who do the same as you, but if you put your own stamp on what you do then you can be as successful.
The other negative feeling is not feeling like you are part of anything. I felt like this for ages and it did get to me. I remember being invited to someone’s anniversary party when I worked in a holiday camp and feeling like would stand out like sore thumb and not really be wanted there, and was only being invited because who I was romantically with.
If you feel like this then ask yourself. Do I have friends that will be there in a shot if they knew I was feeling like this? Do you get on with these people? What I do when I feel this way is say, “Okay it may be that no if I weren’t with a certain person perhaps I wouldn’t be invited but can I change their mind by being happy for an invite and show them that I am worthy of their company?” Yes I can and I did.
There are those who can make you feel inadequate but if I am going to an unfamiliar ground but feel I have to go to someone’s party because at the same time not want to let that person down, is tell yourself like I have “You don’t have to stay and there is always a door you can walk out of”.
I have suffered with social anxiety because I have been with people in a romantic way and have been cheated on and that can hit you like a knife but because I knew the relationship was over did like above, Addressed, Faced and Handled and then I was like “Okay that is fine, I did fight for it but now know it is time to walk away” and you can tell yourself that as human nature intended to listen to your gut instinct if it is good or bad to stay or go, it will let you know.
Another negative feeling is towards yourself. Not able to look in the mirro and I get this alot and hve been like it since I was a kid. Sometimes the image of myself in my head was different to what I saw in the mirror and so have a notepad and write down the things you do like about yourself.
We can be harder to ourselves than to other people and we all have a uniqueness and qualities and so go through it and if you say “There’s nothing that I like” then ask a friend to do this for you and have them read it out to you. You’ll be surprised as to what they see that you don’t about yourself.
Try and do something differet each day. So two night ago I decided to introduce a new item into my routine and that is choose a song a day and put it on Twitter and it will be a song that has been part of my life and I did this as it gives me a lift and reaches to those too who need that.
I also in one of my journals write a wish a day or a few and it is helping me feel better as this week I have been a bit run down and so it is good to find these little things that stops my negative thoughts and feelings and make each day count.
So I hope that this blog has helped you and see you in another one.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: All my blogs and videos will be uploaded to my site:
Kenneth Williams was famous for plays and TV sitcoms when they first came out in the 1940s as young boy and worked with many actors who were from a working class back ground and became a household favourite and you only had to look at his expressions to find him comical. He was born for acting and even did voices of many children’s TV characters too.
I wrote my last inspiring stories about Joan Simms and they adored each other. They were like brother and sister and protected each other from the public eye and he would often like another actor would, who knew Cilla Black, would often have Sunday lunch with her and her family.
He was loved by the Queen and should have been knighted as he was one of the funniest actors on the TV and was charmin, but he loved like Joan Simms the Quiet life at times and a very Private life. He never talked about his sexuality and never allowed the press to either, but wanted to be known for his art he did on camera and was loved by so many, and his comedy was timeless.
Not alot of people know this, but he would often get involved in behind the scenes of the plays and Carry on films and was a writer himself.
He like me would keep notebooks filled with jokes and kept a diary which they did do a documentary on which I felt was inpersonal as a diary is a secret and he never consented to it. Diaries are private journals of someones thoughts and fears and he was private, not because he felt he had anything to hide but because it was his way of emptying out his mind, and helped him through some dark days like we all can have, and happy days too.
He loved the theatre and when they had a VIP membership for the Strand he couldn’t resist but he acted there himself too and was his favourite theatre along with the London Palladium.
His last performance was in 1988 and as at the Old Ivy and a Royal Performance which was his dream come true and was a memeroable performance and had the who theatre in tears of laughter. He did do Radio too and did do tapes aswell, but would be known as the “Funniest Man ever known because he was naturally funny gifted comedian and actor and told jokes that were his and will never be forgotten”.
Kenneth, we love you and thank you for the laughs and stories and is what made you who you were.
Hi and happy Tuesday! So below is a video I created to Introduce my Life Coaching programme I have created starting this year called “Project 2021” talking about what is going to be included and that you can watch the videos for free on this site and on Youtube, or when I create them into Life Coaching course, and I will keep you posted as to when that is set up.
There will be more videos and blogs included so please keep watching and reading, and if you would like to be kept up to date with the posts and videos on this site, please click the follow option below.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie (L.M) X
P.S: I have a Facebook page and a Pinterest board dedicated to this programme too:
I apologise first of all for this post being late, as I want to do these weekly but am a week behind so they may be two of these posts this week. It is my Inspiring Stories post where I like to share those that have inspired me, and this week it is Aunty Joany Sims. She looked like my Nan Rose, but that is because they were related, I know someone will dispute that but it is true. I loved her.
She was a stunning woman and was destined to be a star. She was a rarity in that she went to stage school, the first one ever to be build and created in England and in London, and what made her so wonderful she never forgot her routes and is a girl from my own neck of the woods being family, Chelsea London.
Here she is with her on screen son Dennis Waterman and was taken in between filming and why Uncle Dennis and Aunty Joan could have been mother and son for real. Her charactor Mrs Wembley, stood out like a lot of her roles she played and where she would say her famous catchphrase as Mrs Wembley “Just The One”, and was one of her favourite programmes she done and why she loved being in comedies rather than serious shows.
I’d like to say for the record was one of the people who I saw make it and helped me believe I would one day too. She was a local girl and loved performing in bars and clubs, and was never tarty in anyway and was very much a womans woman, who believes elegance was better.
Aunty Joan was like Uncle Bark in that she could play very wellspoken posh roles and typical London girl roles and loved her cups of tea and her tiple “G&T” (Gin and Tonic) just like my Nan, on my dads side and wrote many of the scripts for her characters, if she felt they needed to be tweaked and liked to blend in a show than just put in as a special star guest.
Aunty Joan When she was in the Prime of her career starting 1935 to 1992
She like many actors and actresses began on stage doing many plays like the first stage production of “My Fair Lady”, “Oliver Twist” and “Me and My Girl”. She did suffer like me with lack of self confidence, but she never allowed it to effect her acting and would literally click into charactor as soon as she passed the stage curtain onto the stage.
Like those who love being on stage, saw it as her second home and became second nature, it was mainly Press photos and interviews she struggled with, and even up to when she was was middle aged, found these difficult as she felt comfortable when in charactor than being herself off stage in front of cameras.
In the Carry on films she was very weary at first because of sharing any nudity, and stated that she would be happy to be in the films but remain fully clothed in the films and became one of the well known faces of those films. Sid James saw her as a sister along with Kenneth Williams and many others in those films and was able to have a private life aswell.
She liked being mum and aunty to her family and being a normal Londoner and have a Roast Dinner on a Sunday.
Aunty Joan was very much grounded woman and never let fame get the better of her and embraced it at the same time. She did attract many fellow actors but even this didn’t stop her from having a normalish life and that what set her above the rest.
I loved her and idolised her a lot. She could sing, dance and act, and when she did she lit up every theatre, film and production she ever set herself in.
She was a wonderful woman and had a brilliant personality and it was seen when she performed and will be known as the “Woman who always shone on camera”. Here are some of her wonderful roles on TV.
I will be back again this week with another star who inspired me, and memory lives on.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie (L.M) X
P.S: If you would like to read my other Inspiring stories written so far, up to this one then here they are below:
So as part of my Project 2021, which is a Life Coaching Programme I am putting together to help you my readers of my blog post try to have a better year than last and with that I want to put up a lot of Slogans too, and here I show a Slogan on one of my jumpers from Amazon, which Says “Be Kind” and is featured in my first Project 2021 video.
This first Youtube Video dedicated to this programme Project 2021 is about using Laughter to help make you feel better about passed issues and events, and can help you feel better about the things that once bothered you. Laughter is a great source of medicine to being more happy about life.
I will be adding this footage to the Online Course I want to do too, dedicated to this Life Coaching Programme, and I have linked my first blog on this site about 2021, below, so go ahead and see the link which includes the link to my dedicated Facebook Group too.
Please read this article that came up on my Laptop today about a kid who tried to con the Tooth fairy:
Being able to laugh at situations can really help you through the days and weeks, and when I have days where I feel a bit down, I try to find items that will make me laugh and feel better.
It is a great source of happiness and those endorphins aren’t to be missed but taken advantage of, and you will soon be happier about things that have taken place in your life, which at first seemed to be the hardest moments; I find writing items in my books that I found humorious to be a great way to do that, as well as sad times, and sometimes writing sad stories you can still add a comical stamp on it.
So keep going, stay strong and never give up believing.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie (L.M) X
P.S: Please check out my Pinterest board dedicated to this Life Coaching programme:
This post is for my new Programme I have created called Project 2021, giving a lot of Life Coaching Tools and Information, and will be put up on my Pinterest page and my Facebook book I have created for it too; See below at the end of this post:
Here are my Top Ten Life Coaching Tips:
1). Listen to empowering music that gives you that inner strength of, lets have a good day. It is one of the things I do as soon as I wake up, and helps me to wakeup slowly and look forward to the day
2). Find someone that inspires you. I first learned about Life Coaching when I was feeling lost and I came across a site which had some short videos of people talking to a guy on the stage Called Tony Robbins and I was so takenaback as he would have some audience members telling him their story and to find help from him of how to deal with certain situations. Such as a relationship breakdown, how to stop feeling stuck in a rut and were looking for support in their difficult situation. When he spoke it did feel like he was also talking to me, and has inspired me no end. You need to find those that helps to bring your confidence out and not make it complicated. So someone even if it s an actor or singer that brings a smile to your face and gives you everlasting energy
3). Change your routine. If your bored of doing the same thing everyday, then change it and do something different in your days. This may mean coming out of your comfort zone, but it will give you better energy to stick with the change of routine, and if there is something you have always wanted to do, then do it
4). Don’t let Lockdown stop you from having a good day. So if you feel you need to go out then do, if you want to see a friend then do. If they live far away but you have a way to contact them, then go ahead and why not download Zoom and have a meeting where you can see each other, grab a coffee and have a well earned chat
5). Never give up on love. Sometimes it is hard to come by and I have learned last year that those who would make out they adored you, sometimes used it to disguise their hatried towards me and so I pulled away and I felt so relieved by doing so. Often people like that can make you feel inadequate. If your gut instinct tells you, “no they aren’t really my friends”, if they give a smirk or look like they may be talking behind your back, then don’t waste your time with them. Find those who make you feel important in their life and that your friendship with you is valued
6). Spend more time with your family. We can get so lost in our work, especially at home, but taking two hours a day to spend with your kids, whether it is baking, playing a board game or watching a TV programme. We can often feel unfulfilled by our work, when we don’t get to spend time with those we love, so take that time and then go back to your work later
7). Write a letter to those that have passed away in your life and say the things you wish you had wanted to say, but never got the chance to when they were alive and it will heal the pain of their lose. I am gutted that I never got to see my dad before he died, and it was like a thud when it hit me. At first it didn’t sink in, and then at his funeral it did, and I felt so sad that my words were never heard by him, and losing a parent that once protected you, is hard to face. I still go over it, and I think that regret will always be there, but I have found, that listening to music he loved and I did too, gives me comfort and I haven’t done this yet written a letter, as you do have to be ready too, but will as I think I need to get out what I had wished to have said and then it is there
8). Get to know who you are. This took me a while to know who I really was, and by doing many things in my life, like writing, listening to music, reading and watching TV and Youtube, made me get to know who I was. I am someone who can be quiet, enjoys her own company, but likes good relationships to the point all I want to do is be with them non stop and when I let my hair down I go for it. I have never been someone who slept around, or did drugs, but I just liked to go out, dance, with friends and get other people to enjoy themselves too and just be me.
9). Stop competing with your self. I have often done this and had many people in my life, acting as if they can do anything and be good at, to score a point over me, judging if I could or not. I never point score, but have found I have had to catch myself, as those types of people can suck you in. Be your bestfriend and not an enemy
10). Reward yourself. If you have exercised or taken up a new skill, then reward yourself and give yourself credit. I can be so critical of myself that I sometimes have to say “Look shut up and let me be”. We do need to be kinder to ourselves and when you do something that made you smile then have that well earned alcoholic drink, or takeaway. Lets just live without having regret or feelings of guilt and have a happier life than before
See my Pinterest board, dedicated to my New Programme, Project 2021: