Before I begin this blog post I want to share this video I came across on Youtube about Manipulative people and this lady gives some really good tips on how to deal with thoe who do this:
Manipulative people can be anywhere and lay beneath the surface so at first you think they are okay and they often want to gain your trust so when their true identity comes alive you then see “Oh God I have made friends with the wrong person”.
They can be very sneaky as they can start to crawl towards other people you know and then you get pushed out, but once that other person disappears they suddenly become your friend again. They will often be two faced and twist what you say and only hear what they want.
These types of people can often pick on you for know reason, and then walk away because they hae caused an argument and then pretend that it was someone else or you. They lose the sense of the truth as they lie a lot and their motives are often wrong as they just decided that because you are popular with people that they will become your friends to be your enemy later.
What you need to do is Gain Control and say “Do you know you just made a snidy comment”. If they smile and shrug their shoulders then they see that you know what they’re are doing, and so move away.
When it comes to manipulative you don’t want to take fully control, but make sure you still give them some control by saying “Do you fancy another drink? So we can have a chat”.
If they then decide to move away then you have gain perspective and they know you are going to confront them, which can detour them and then they will often avoid you.
People who twist and turn the things you say, or act as if everything you say is rubbish they are actually lashing out as they don’t like it, a lot of the time when you don’t see it their way and its their way or the highway. They feel that they should be right all of the time, and hate it when you are. They will have one voice that is plain and non expressive and will talk at you, not to you.
So, if you come across someone like this Gain some control, but still allowing them some too and be on guard, to let them know you what they are doing and that you are’gonna address it and its gonna stop.
Hello and welcome! So firstly if you have not been following my series of blogs for my programme “Project 2021” then please go to my Pinterest board which has all my recent videos and blogs, which has a lot of Life coaching tools and information. There is also new boards and sections I have created too, if you wanted to look at my other boards and pins.
So in this blog I am talking about How to not get bogged down but getting it done/Being super productive.
I firstly work with one notebook which is my main one and for me is a life saver. I did a video on one of my other sites which I write, on google and did a video about How I live in my notebook.
That is the first,
Tip 1# Find a system that makes scheduling your work simple and that can help you stick to it. I am creating a planner at the moment that I hope will help you, and will be for fello content creators.
Tip 2# If you have kids then separate your time, so when they are homeschooling give them tasks that they can do without supervision so you get work done, and spare an hour to help them and use the evenings to block time out to do your work.
When I have my dinner or do my skincare of an evening I will use this time to watch a bit of TV on BBC iPlayer for example or watch a Youtube video, and it is great to just have that time and do a bit of reading a day. This is a new habit I am Implementing at the moment and it has helped me to read a bit of a book if it is only reading one or two pages. It just good to do things that help me wind down and in the morning wake me up.
Tip 3# Batch your work. So on some days I will pre-film a few videos or put together a batch of blog posts ready to go live. It can save a huge amount and then have a “Take it easier day” and have that time to catch up on reading or watching television. Or even some cooking or go for a walk if you have been cooped up within 4 walls all week.
The other thing I try to do is the night before go through what I have done on that day and what else that needs completed, is there any overdue items not done? What is scheduled for the next day ahead?
Tip 4# Plan ahead on some days, but don’t over plan. Try to get what you still have left from the day before and then get todays list down, and make time for breaks.
Once I have my own home again, which is going to be soon in a few days it seems, I like to potter so I will be each day even though I don’t like cleaning I like to, just go around the home putting bits away, taking anything that needs to be put in a different room that hasn’t been put in its home and just go in each room, tidying and straightening out.
Tip 5# Set time to do this each day or twice a week. I find doing this helps the chaos that life can bring be stopped and get up to date with Home Projects.
So I hope these tips are helpful and I hope you have survived lockdown too, but waiting for it shift and be able to do more fun things again out of the home again.
Many thanks for reading, ‘
Carrie L.M X
P.S: Please check out my Youtube channel, as I have today uploaded a few new videos including my weekend chat video:
IN THIS BLOG I AM TALKING ABOUT DEALING WITH NEGATIVE FEELINGS AND JEALOUSY WHICH I TALK ABOUT IN THE VIDEO LINKED ABOVE AND IS ONE THAT IS NEGATIVE AND HAS A MASSIVE IMPACT TO YOUR HAPPINESS AND WELLBEING.
People say that Jealousy is healthy and keeps like your spouse on their toes, but being someone who has been targetted by those that have been jealous I disagree. In fact being someone who was once a Jealous person it is not a nice feeling at all, and its like what Mel Robbins says, your basically saying “There isn’t enough of what that person has to go around, and your not worthy of doing that too”.
I was targetted quite badly for someone who felt that way and it was as if I had no rights of a life of many amazing things because they felt they wouldn’t and so why should I. I am going to be blunt here: THAT AIN’T MY FAULT.
I stopped my jealousy by asking myself questions, like: So do I want that person to fail or not have a life? How would I feel if they did that to me? and it has made me address, face and handle.
To get rid of negative feelings including resentment which comes with jealousily and hatred because someone is doing better than you, but you don’t want to feel that way either, Address those feelings by asking questions like above, Face them because if you try to ignore them the stronger those feelinngs can grow within you and handle, so deal with them so they go away from your thoughts and fears.
Now if there is a person who knows you are feeling that way and play on those feelings so a boyfriend purposely kisses someone else in front of you, knowing that you are going to be upset then that is different, and they are doing it to be spiteful and this is where you can say “What was that about and why?” and then walk away unless they follow.
There are people who will play with your insecurities, but this doesn’t make them super confident it means they are insecure more than you, as they think to help them stop feeling like they don’t like themselves aim it at you to make themselves feel superior to you.
Those feelings can have a tendency to rub off on you, and before you know it your doing it.
Fear is often a course of negative feelings, because we fear that if they do well means that it may mean we never will, but anyone can be successful but creating their own work, so not copying and using your own talents and interests for you to have a happy life aswell. Check out video: Finding your Talent.
Example McDonalds and Burger King. So McDonalds was formed in America in the 70’s and was the it fast food restaurtant to go to, and it took over our English version Wimpy, and the guy from McDonalds who was the creator knew that if he could come over to England and open up here aswell as America then it has a good chance to reach other countries.
Then someone who worked at McDonalds wanted to make their own version and build a fastfood Franchise but got jealous of McDonalds rein and even threatened to close McDonalds down as they were told where ever you build your fastfood restaurant we will be there too so you will never be as big.
Yet the top two fastfood outlets in the 90’s were McDonald and Burger King. They were at logger heads all the time, but they both succeeded and both had restaurants all over the world. So there is always enough to go around and still stand out against others who do the same as you, but if you put your own stamp on what you do then you can be as successful.
The other negative feeling is not feeling like you are part of anything. I felt like this for ages and it did get to me. I remember being invited to someone’s anniversary party when I worked in a holiday camp and feeling like would stand out like sore thumb and not really be wanted there, and was only being invited because who I was romantically with.
If you feel like this then ask yourself. Do I have friends that will be there in a shot if they knew I was feeling like this? Do you get on with these people? What I do when I feel this way is say, “Okay it may be that no if I weren’t with a certain person perhaps I wouldn’t be invited but can I change their mind by being happy for an invite and show them that I am worthy of their company?” Yes I can and I did.
There are those who can make you feel inadequate but if I am going to an unfamiliar ground but feel I have to go to someone’s party because at the same time not want to let that person down, is tell yourself like I have “You don’t have to stay and there is always a door you can walk out of”.
I have suffered with social anxiety because I have been with people in a romantic way and have been cheated on and that can hit you like a knife but because I knew the relationship was over did like above, Addressed, Faced and Handled and then I was like “Okay that is fine, I did fight for it but now know it is time to walk away” and you can tell yourself that as human nature intended to listen to your gut instinct if it is good or bad to stay or go, it will let you know.
Another negative feeling is towards yourself. Not able to look in the mirro and I get this alot and hve been like it since I was a kid. Sometimes the image of myself in my head was different to what I saw in the mirror and so have a notepad and write down the things you do like about yourself.
We can be harder to ourselves than to other people and we all have a uniqueness and qualities and so go through it and if you say “There’s nothing that I like” then ask a friend to do this for you and have them read it out to you. You’ll be surprised as to what they see that you don’t about yourself.
Try and do something differet each day. So two night ago I decided to introduce a new item into my routine and that is choose a song a day and put it on Twitter and it will be a song that has been part of my life and I did this as it gives me a lift and reaches to those too who need that.
I also in one of my journals write a wish a day or a few and it is helping me feel better as this week I have been a bit run down and so it is good to find these little things that stops my negative thoughts and feelings and make each day count.
So I hope that this blog has helped you and see you in another one.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie L.M X
P.S: All my blogs and videos will be uploaded to my site:
Hello and welcome! This is a blog that has my Youtube Midweek Chat Video talking about those who go to the extreme to try out do others.
I never treat life like it is a competition but there are those that do and will do anything to get on camera, and try and score points and I have created a Life Coaching video talking about this too, and will be added soon. At the end of the day, your work should be original but don’t do it to win points over someone but that you enjoy what you do. There is someone I know who thought the Virgina Monalogues was someone showing their virgina but it is not, and decided to make a video about their private area, and wants to do the Virgina Monalogues not realising what it is really is about. It in fact is about a womans struggles through the teenage years of puberty and discovering sex.
I am going to do this video each week and on Wednesdays and a Weekend Chat too on various topics. So I hope you enjoy this video and please let me know what you think of those who try to out do someone and have a story I would love to hear from you. You can comment below.
All my blogposts will be on my Pinterest site and my blognetwork, aswell as Facebook and Twitter:
So in this post I am talking about Extreme Youtubing, and the extent that People will go to, to create content and I came across a video about How to put on your Video and Skype Call face on. This is after a I did a video about not exploiting or trying to out do someone and showing your body to the world and people getting the wrong idea of things.
Please watch this video:
Most of the time when we are video or skype calling in our own homes, its with our mates and I don’t see someone saying “Don’t call me via Video or Skype, I want you to put your video and Skype call face on first”.
If someone had ever said that to me I would not call them fall stop, and leave them to chat with themselves. I think that this shows how many people worry about appearances too much, as that is not important. I would not stop talking to someone because they have decided to have a no make up day.
I suppose you are wondering why this has any relevance to Life Coaching, well basically when we feel we are’t having a fulfilled life we can blame ourselves because of the way we look and feel ashamed of ourselves.
Let me tell you from someone who doesn’t always like to look in the mirror, appearances are not important but being human is and as long as you show love and compation then appearance is at the bottom of the list and its your personality that will shine through.
So Look after yourself, be true, be strong and never allow anyone stop you for wanting a better and happier life.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie (L.M) X
P.S: All my blogs and videos for my Life Coaching programme, “Project 2021” can be found via my Pinterest and my Squarespace site:
Hello this blog post is talking about Exploitation and copying and is part of my Life Coaching Programme “Project 2021”.
This post includes a video, where by I address obsessive Copying and Exploitation, because there are people who will steal people’s work to have for themselves and is an insult and disrespect to the person who has made the time and effort to create that work and so why do that? Please watch this video:
I love being inspired and it is good to see how other people do things and is how I got into blogging, but I believe in creating your own stamp on things, and making it yours. I have created this programme to help people to have a better life and one area I want to address is those who copy others, because they can’t be original and do their own work. There are those who exploit themselves by filming themselves naked and showing their body parts to try and score points over someone thinking it is going to get them more noticed.
Let me say, this does not and it is making you look obscene and downright disgusting and let’s face it, would you want to see a mans bits or a womens bits when eating your steak and chips, settling down to watch some Youtube? No.
So be real, be true and make your work your own.
Many thanks you reading,
Carrie (L.M) X
P.S: I will be posting more each day and you can see all my posts for my Life Coaching “Project 2021” Programme on Pinterest:
I also have a Facebook Group to if you would like to join:
I apologise first of all for this post being late, as I want to do these weekly but am a week behind so they may be two of these posts this week. It is my Inspiring Stories post where I like to share those that have inspired me, and this week it is Aunty Joany Sims. She looked like my Nan Rose, but that is because they were related, I know someone will dispute that but it is true. I loved her.
She was a stunning woman and was destined to be a star. She was a rarity in that she went to stage school, the first one ever to be build and created in England and in London, and what made her so wonderful she never forgot her routes and is a girl from my own neck of the woods being family, Chelsea London.
Here she is with her on screen son Dennis Waterman and was taken in between filming and why Uncle Dennis and Aunty Joan could have been mother and son for real. Her charactor Mrs Wembley, stood out like a lot of her roles she played and where she would say her famous catchphrase as Mrs Wembley “Just The One”, and was one of her favourite programmes she done and why she loved being in comedies rather than serious shows.
I’d like to say for the record was one of the people who I saw make it and helped me believe I would one day too. She was a local girl and loved performing in bars and clubs, and was never tarty in anyway and was very much a womans woman, who believes elegance was better.
Aunty Joan was like Uncle Bark in that she could play very wellspoken posh roles and typical London girl roles and loved her cups of tea and her tiple “G&T” (Gin and Tonic) just like my Nan, on my dads side and wrote many of the scripts for her characters, if she felt they needed to be tweaked and liked to blend in a show than just put in as a special star guest.
Aunty Joan When she was in the Prime of her career starting 1935 to 1992
She like many actors and actresses began on stage doing many plays like the first stage production of “My Fair Lady”, “Oliver Twist” and “Me and My Girl”. She did suffer like me with lack of self confidence, but she never allowed it to effect her acting and would literally click into charactor as soon as she passed the stage curtain onto the stage.
Like those who love being on stage, saw it as her second home and became second nature, it was mainly Press photos and interviews she struggled with, and even up to when she was was middle aged, found these difficult as she felt comfortable when in charactor than being herself off stage in front of cameras.
In the Carry on films she was very weary at first because of sharing any nudity, and stated that she would be happy to be in the films but remain fully clothed in the films and became one of the well known faces of those films. Sid James saw her as a sister along with Kenneth Williams and many others in those films and was able to have a private life aswell.
She liked being mum and aunty to her family and being a normal Londoner and have a Roast Dinner on a Sunday.
Aunty Joan was very much grounded woman and never let fame get the better of her and embraced it at the same time. She did attract many fellow actors but even this didn’t stop her from having a normalish life and that what set her above the rest.
I loved her and idolised her a lot. She could sing, dance and act, and when she did she lit up every theatre, film and production she ever set herself in.
She was a wonderful woman and had a brilliant personality and it was seen when she performed and will be known as the “Woman who always shone on camera”. Here are some of her wonderful roles on TV.
I will be back again this week with another star who inspired me, and memory lives on.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie (L.M) X
P.S: If you would like to read my other Inspiring stories written so far, up to this one then here they are below: