Life Coaching Strategies/Never compare yourself

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Hello and welcome to a new blog post, where i will be sharing some Life coaching strategies and about never compare yourself. We are all different as the world would be a boring place if we weren’t yet we easily compare ourselves to others, as we feel that they have more of a life than you. Well so it seems, but does it get anywhere? No!

I am in a place where I can say I’m finally happy to be me, I don’t want to be a envious or jealous girl I once was, because I find those feelings limiting your self belief. There isn’t enough of someones success to go round.

I was always comparing myself cause I felt you had to be a super human to have a nice home, to be able to work for yourself and that I would never be someone who could buy a new home that I can call mine.

Now I know that is not the case and I do have my own money now and I am not in the need of cash as now I am earning my own money and it has kept me in a good mindset, and has helped me land on my feet. I idolise people like Jennifer Aniston, as she is my fashion icon and I love her character in friends and what she also wears in the show as Rachel Green. I do style myself not to copy but in admiration of her and it that helps as I do like to make an effort on some days in terms of clothes, hair and make up and that gives me a reason to get out of bed for, but to compare, she isn’t me she is her and I would never think of being her as she is her own person,, but I admire cause I think could I wear that what look coiuld I do that would make me feel good about mysefl?

Once you start to compare yourself you find that the ehtusiasm to find you fades and stop you from getting out of bed, so take five minute writing about you and what you are about, not comparing and forget those cause they are never gonna be you, and you are never gonna be them, and it can make you miserable even by trying. So it is important to find out who you are.

Comparing Ourselves to Others | A Journey to Loving Yourself

So never compare and be you, as you will be surprised once you think about you rather than someone else what qualities you find that you have.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie L.M X

Weekend blog/More Happiness Printables for your happy journal

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Now if you had seen my blog I wrote about me creating printables for a happy journal I have created another set of printables for it. so see this below:

I its going through what has made you happy in the past, now and what will make you happy in the future.

I would feel lost if I didn’t have a happiness journal and not having it with me now, I feel lost too.

If you have any recommendations of items you would like me to add then please let me know.

Many thanks,

Carrie L.M X

An Eye Opener to Mental health/Things that need to change

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Being hosptial for mental health I have come to see that the nurses on these wards are wonderful, perhaps I have been lucky in that respect, as i am sure there will be some that disagree, but so far spending time in a psychiatric ward, the nursers are second to none, and are the ones that do the hard work. The Doctor mmm…not convinced so far, but the one thing I felt comfortable with is that, they let you watch TV when you want to, nap, play sports outside and just chat with you and the nurses and other medical staff including the cleaners sit and take time to ask how you are and sit and watch TV with you.

The food isn’t that great but being someone who went to a Primary school that had slop on a plate many days there, the food is bearable, and they lay out some snacks too.

When it comes to mental health it seems that not all the doctors are on board with it, and that is the problem and it likes “Oh lets just change their medication to see if that helps?”, “Really?” and yet when a resident of a mental health hospital needs medication for whatever reason it gets ignored.

CAN YOU SEE THE ISSUE?

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For me, in terms of mental health is that, I want to chat with someone every now and again, as we often want being someone who has had mental health issues to reach out to someone who gets it, and only being in a mental health hospital, I got to say I am not convinced that there is in terms of medical science when it comes to doctors and #mentalhealth .

Drugs should only be short term, not long, because with every medication, being on many as a kid, they all have side effects, and some are quite drastic, and what gets me is how the doctors play it down.

The two doctors I love watching Doctor Hilary on Lorraine and Doctor Chris on This Morning, because they seem to understand, if only there were more like them around, and Agony aunts do more than what I have seen of doctors when it comes to medical help, being in a mental health hospital.

Prince William, did a programme a while back with sportsmen and about Mental Health, as the pressure of being a professional sports person does come with a lot of pressure, and when they doubt their ability when playing a professional sport, how they have been effected by it. I thought this highlighted mental health in that anyone can have mental health problems so it should be well respected and given compassion not judgement.

From the doctors I have seen in Epsom they did get it and I felt I was being cared for in the correct way and were listened to, yet in other areas not so much. It feels like they are being quite ignorant about it. Not really caring about the how the person actually feels. The nurses top of their game, and they are the ones who I’d like to work with at some point to have mental health to be understood more and not from someones who assumes just changing their medication will help.

We want to heart, we want support and be heard correctly and not to be shut down and be judged by the one actual person who should on our side, the doctor, and that for me is the problem. The better doctors we have that “Get it” the better we would all feel and the more they do support and not challenge it the more people and children to, will be open up about their mental health.

So if you need support interms of mental health, then the best organisation is Mind.org and they work around the clock in supporting people and by the NHS too, but in terms of the medical support, its some of the doctors that has made me see that things still need to change, as they just “Dont get it”.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie L.M X

Life Coaching/Mental Health/Different forms/It should never hold you back

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Hello so I am taking a break from my videos as I have done quite a few and don’t want to bombard you with with anymore and what to give you time to catch up. Here is a link to my Youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCUDFIqjVKLy7NhtcR6Hy0Tg

When it comes to #mentalhealth there are different forms and I really do not get the Mentle health act, because I think for me that sounds like its some how wrong to have mental health issues, but why “Aren’t we allow to feel, think and be who we want to be”. We are not criminals we are people who find life often a struggle to many who seem to make their bed everyday, and go jogging with the inner voice telling you “No leave it until tomrrow” and have success over success,

The Scientific Underpinnings and Impacts of Shame - Scientific American

To me this is why people don’t want to talk about Mental Health because in some way we’re seen as Second Class Citizens and not worthy of happiness, when this is all we want. WE WANT TO BE HAPPY! Do you think we want to be completely depressed, do you really think we want to feel, that we aren’t worthy for feeling like we have no place in this world any more? Its about Support and being able to express ourselves and this is why I am supporting Mind,org to stop it being criminalised to have Mental Health issues.

I am on top of the world and haven’t felt so good in all of my life, as I can now say “I like me and I am happy to be me” and that is not hitting out on anyone its just I often found it hard to be me cause I struggled with self image, and all do is try to do the right thing and this then happens to be wrong. I have come out of the otherside in terms of Mental Health, and I am glad to now have the time to re-address my life more and keep forever building and that, is what it is all about.

So the different forms. You have BiPolar, Anxiety, Anxiousness, Depression and PTSD. They are the main ones, but they aren’t want you are born with, but because of a cause. Like a Trauma, a loss of someone and being continually told “You aren’t good enough”. It is a form of Mind Management, because with mental health once you learn about it, you know the triggers and the how to deal with certain events and emotions to manage it.

When it comes to feeling good in your mind that is what we want to achieve, when we want help and support with our Mental health, and there is those who just need to be away from their current surroundings and be heard. They want to know that there are people on their side, and so if you have a mental health problem. never allow it to hold you back and use it to make you stronger.

I am never going to stop living as we all have a right to live and breath. So, make a promise to yourself today, and you can do this by writing a Personal Profile,, a mission statement about yourself or a letter to yourself. I wrote down some rules for myself, that I wasn’t going to allow anyone to stop me from living, stop me from doing good things for people and being happy and in love.

There is a law in Mental health, in that it should never be challenged, yet it still is, and so I do think the laws in terms of mental health should be changed.

I am someone who is particular about who I will talk to and who I won’t and I am never disrespectful, its that I do hold my guard up at times, for protection and to never get into someone especially with mental health problmes in their personal space because that is what they fear, the most and I do. Being bullied has been part of that and so, I will often wait until someone talks to me, as I am someone who often does want to be out of the way, but not isolated, but to allow other people space and myself and if people want to talk to you they will.

I never ignore anyone, I acknowledge as this like me is important as I myself do not like it when someone knows you are there but they pretend your not, and found it hard with my ex-husband when he would bump into someone he worked with and like at the beginning he would introduce me, and then stopped but would introduce my little boy, which was good, but it was like “Hello I’m here too” and you know when that starts it is a sign that, perhaps either work this out which I did as I, often go straight to “Oh well it must be me” and no.

I don’t blame him at all, and I would like to think he feels the same, it just makes you see when you address it without getting angry like before, you in mind have learned to help your mental health and see things without shouting or crying. So #letsworktogether and lets help support and raise awareness of mental health.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie L.M X

Monday Weekly Post/Dressing for the Job You want?Picture Perfect

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There is a brilliant film called Picture Perfect with Jennifer Aniston, who works for an advertising agency and is a Single Woman who wants promotion and comes up with a good advertising slogan for some mustard and gets told when she thinks she will get promoted and gets to help Manage the compaign finds out she won’t and as the Manager of the agency tells her, she has to “Dress for the job she wants”. Is this true? Would this really happen?

This blog is Sponsored by #indeed who are a leading job search network.

Watch this video below about Working and How Employees employ by first impressions:

So when I begin to do TV work I will be wearing more tailored and will be making more of an effort, but I do like to still look presentable at times when doing my work at home too. With Content Creator a lot of the work is off the cuff and doesn’t really matter but in the week I do like to be bit more presentable and I do tend to dress for the whatever type of area in terms of work may be.

When I worked for a contact centre for example I had to where professional office gear and they did have rules of what you could and couldn’t wear, like anything that exposed the shoulders, not too short a skirt, clothes were ironed and you looked presentable as they would often have clients visiting the centre.

Yes Fridays we were allowed to wear our jeans but we still couldn’t go in too scruffy, and not have holes in shirts or tights. You still had to set a kind of good standard with the call floor you worked on. When I worked at a Holiday camp I would wear uniform but again it had to be clean, good personal hygiene and make sure hair was put up out of the way and sometimes had to wear hairnet, and then at night as I would go into the venues in going out evening etire. Now, it wasn’t so strict but I liked after slaving away working within the restaurants dressing up and it did impress the guest because even though you weren’t working you were still expected to keep the camps good reputation and keep a certain standard, as you are still representing the camp.

Now not everyone knew that I worked there, but then people did and I loved just having a good time after I had worked a split shift normally and it was time to let me hair down without making a disgrace of myself.

It became the life I loved, and I came to love it and it was the place I knew I needed to be. So in thinking of this, yes you do have to dress going on the work, as working in a restaurant you do have to look smart, professional and ready to great guests into a restaurant and be polite always and look confident.

When going to a job interview, it is always good to look smart and clean with a shaved face at times, depending on the job, but not like you have just got out of bed. Employers want to see that you are clean and if their first impression is not good then their clients will feel the same which can then effect a business. so when it comes to employment yes you should dress for the job you want. Many retailers want to see that you are someone who is fashionable if it is a clothes shop, and you shop in their store if it is well known or chain store, and that you do look at trends, by dressing in some of their items by that first impressiion they see of you.

So, I hope that has helped you should you be looking for a new job it is your first job, then good luck.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie L.M X

The Saints of the world?What I consider a saint

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So the saints of the world. Well there have been so many in our world that it is hard to pinpoint one that stands out, as they have all be saints of their own. That is Saint George and I thought it was in May but no just checked I missed it, it was 23rd of April and I will gonna do a whole decorating thing, but no missed it once again. I even bought fleece of the occasion, but no bother I will wear my St Georges attire tomorrow.

Then there is St Patrick, St Davids and the pop group All Saints. So who are now the Saints of this world, now we are in another century and another decade and another year?

  • Warriors

So, the warriors, the kids and adults who have made a different to this world, example Micheal Jackson. Now I know people may quiz this but honestly he is not a Sex Offender at all, and in fact the total opposite. He changed music and bought the music of the 80’s and 90’s to a whole different level and I trusted him with my life and this is from someone who knew of kids being abused and he was not that.

He used his fame to look after the world and kids, yet the price of fame lead him to his death as he was set upon and made into a monster which was not true. When a guy of him relm come along there are always those who want a slice of the cake and that is what happened.

Micheal, loved music and that was something that he knew could help him in his position to change the world, but often like Jesus they can put on trial for doing so. He was being used and drugged cause people around him pretended to love when they didn’t. I can identify myself with Micheal as this happened to me. I would never abuse or bully anyone, and isn’t in my vocabulary. Yet cause of people pretending to be on his side, made him into an enemie because jealousy and resentment.

He struggled with self image, and people were like, why? He is famous how can he have problems with the way he looks? Cause like many the image we see in our heads is not always what we see in he mirror, and he did have a generic skin condtion which effected his confidence.

To me though, I want to celebrate the art he created and he was a one off, as he made music into being cool when Disco, Mowtown and soul were seen old fashioned. He put music and started he 80’s and is why it is one of the most celebrated decades of music, on the map. Even now the the video Thriller is the top videos of music videos of all time.

  • Survivor

So that leads me to the next one. A Survivor. To me that makes me think of the people who Survived the disasters like Hillsborough, as this changed the world of football, and how matches were managed, and seeing this disaster unfold, I was in total shock afterwards, and made me feel fear like nothing before. I feel in some way an imposter for saying that because “I wasn’t there” but I knew that possibly my cousin had gone to the game, and I said to my mum to call my Aunty to check, but it was fine he wasn’t and it was one that will always be gut wrenching.

The supporters who were the saviours of that day, then were accused of killing other supporters, yet they were the heros. I am now working with the Police and on that particular day the Police failed them, as when they tried to get out of the massive surge of fan, the Police kept sending them back in. I think of the survivors, who have had to fight truth and nail, cause as the day carried on, it was obvious that there was a massive cover up. That some of the supporters (Liverpool) were drunk, that there had been fights breaking out, and that they falsed a gate open.

Being a Liverpool fan myself, which it has been one of the teams I have supported, and meeting Liverpool fans they would have never done that, it was because the Police weren’t checking tickets and as football crowds do they follow and if they aren’t to, “Go into the other Pens” they went to the first place to watch the game, not realising that there were a packed full of supporters already in there.

From seeing this unfold. I honour Liverpool FC and Everton on how they carried themselves and the game against Everton, I couldn’t watch and I remember turning as I was my living room, to go in my room. I have no idea of how they must have felt, yet they were the ones (the supporters) in trying to save the people who died and injured lives. THEY WERE NEVER CRIMINALS AGAINST THEIR OWN SUPPORTERS IN WAS A POLICE ERROR AND YES GROUND!

  • Inspirational

When I think of Inspirational I think of my friend Kelly who I knew from Peabody and people like Oprah Winfrey. She changed a chat show to a talk show. You think they are the same but no they are not. When I think of chat, i think two people having a natter but often you talking at someone, and I like it when I am talked too. She would talk through the audience to the people on her show. She never hid about problems with her weight and dieting, she was someone who didn’t have a good childhood, but it never stopped her, and became a household name, not just in America but all over the world.

I think of the Queen, especially now, as it goes to show that they are a famous family and she is a real Queen, yet like other families there are problems within it and she has to some how keep it together, and its never out of he public eye. If it were me I know I would be like I am not getting out of bed today, but she has to. That’s how people see it and its the attitude of people saying “Well she is the Queen so what does she expect”. Without seeing she is still a human being, and still bleeds like we all do, and yet has always put on a public appearance.

Anita Dobson I think of too. She put the pub landlady on the map as the pub world even when Eastenders came on our screens was seen as “A mans world” and they turned heads Anita the guy who played Dirty Den, by bringing London life into play. She was he first from the land of the soap to be on Top of the Pops, singing the theme of Eastenders.

I can not walk away without mentioning Cannon and Ball. They are to me Saints of the Double Act world. They have the best double act tune, and I loved The two ronnies and Morecambe and Wise but I was and am a massive Cannon and Ball Fan. Having been someone who hated school knowing they would be on the TV on Saturday made my school days bareable and I would feel so sad when their series would end. I, would say in terms of school Miss Conley was the Saints of Saint Pauls. who would want to walk out by 2pm some days, as yes it was that bad, and she would swear but was one of the fair few teachers who all pupils respected and could relate to, cause she felt like we did, that school was the last place you’d want to be in this world.

So who do you class as saints, going in these things I would love to hear.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie L.M X

How to handle days when it all goe tits up

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I have done many of these blog posts and did a video about it too yesterday as everything seemed to end up on the floor, I nearly took a draw with me and it was as if everything wanted to fall.

When I these days happen I am able to laugh, cause its like when one thing goes wrong, then that how it is for the whole day. Thank god I had my weekly takeaway to help as without Macca D’s I think I would have wanted to have the day end there and then. Yet I got through it and today was better.

We are always going to get days when things don’t go our way, and its how you respond that can help these days pass to a less hap hazard day. Yes going back to bed may be a choice but then staying in bed all day, doesn’t always have a purpose and I like what I do and that has helped. I think it is often where you are in your life at that moment, mentally, financially and romantically, that can make all the difference.

So please see my video here:

Many thanks for reading and watching, and there will be more life coaching blogs to come along with video.

Have a good weekend,

Carrie L.M X

Career Building/Tips to starting a new job/Tips if you get an interview

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I am creating a new Online Course and it will be my first Life coaching course and within it I am putting together some videos, EBooks and blogs about Career Building. Check out this video below of an example of the videos I am putting together:

When it comes to a career you may be going from one job to another, but not finding the one you truly want. I did temping work whilst I looked for Holiday Camp jobs and tried two years on the trot, Butlins, Haven and Pontins, who are under Bourne Leisure, and finally got a job working at the Holiday camp in bognor regis, and I am going to be working at the one in clacton I used to go to as a kid, either this year, depending on COVID or next year.

It is good to spend time just looking through vacancies and what experience and skills you need, and then jotting down the skills and experience you have to see what else you may need to finally get a job within your ideal secter.

Always accept the interview if this is offered, so you can see if that position you have found it what you want to do, and to get to know the employer as well as the job they are offering, to interview them too. Never ask about Pay as yes it is important to get paid, but if it is a career then it not really about the cash its what you are going to get from it and what they are going to get from you as the employee.

A lot of office type jobs and jobs on Holiday camps want to see if you are willing sometimes to work in other departments and basically earn the money you are getting. The time to ask about pay is when you get offered the job, and yes being underpaid is important, but you learn this at the interview without asking, as the question to ask, to find this out without asking about pay, “What is the turnover within the company?” and they will ask you when applying for a job, of “What your current Salary is?”.

Make sure you make an effort if it is a face to face interview in terms of clothes, never chew gum or be eating during an interview even if it is a telephone interview, write notes of what you want to find out down before the interview and let them speak and listen, but you can go through what they’ve said so they know you have listened and never interrupt, and do some research of the company, like checking the details you already have and by their website, if they have one.

I today did another video about Finding work on my Youtube channel so go and check the out if you would like to watch it: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCUDFIqjVKLy7NhtcR6Hy0Tg/

Many thanks for watching,

Carrie L.M X

Monday blog/Monday Video/Life coaching vid/Difference between a Pretender & someone who is real

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We can often be mislead by people thinking they are good, unfortunately it can be those who pretend, use being nice as a cover to disguise who they really are. Then there is the person who vents, but they smile at you and they are naturally nice to people because they often don’t see what an amazing person they are, and they will without question embrace the fact you have got a personalised card for someone, and they don’t get begrudging over it, and then they get an even bigger card, the pretender will disguise their jealousy but a lot of it, is you can read it from their body language and eyes.

Pretenders will pretend to be the victim when they are being told about what they are doing is wrong, by saying how they have missed out, when a real person will take it on board, address it and apologise. When pretenders see someone being cross at someone else, they will intervene and usually take the person having a go and someone, side to then feel superior because that person that is being shouted out, is less of a person then that pretender and they get off on someone who is being told they aren’t good enough, and pretenders love seeing people fail.

I have had those feelings, but I have stopped them because I never want to be a pretender but be real.

Have a wonderful week ahead.

Carrie L.M X

Life coaching blog/What should you be grateful for when nothing seems to be going your way?

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I have been a lot about the POSITIIVITY AND CHANGE YOUR MINDSET but what should you be grateful for when nothing sees to be going your way?

I'm sorry you're having a bad day. Please feel free to rip my head off for  no reason. | Work humor, Call center humor, Ecards funny

Lets cut to the chase. You will always gonna have shit days. I know it hits me but that is it in a nutshell, and I suppose the question next is, Well whats the point of wanting to change my life then?

It is looking at the things that bring you joy like Marie Kondo says, and is like a plaster of life. He is what you can do to make it better to be grateful of friends and the outside world.

Well its do you want more better days rather than those days where you wish you could start again? #letssayittogether YES!

I did a midnight video just now as I write the blog post and you can find it via my channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCUDFIqjVKLy7NhtcR6Hy0Tg

This blog is Sponsered by Mind.org who do wonderful work with people who want to change their life and support them with #mentalhealth and help get their life on track.

You can never control certain days and events that happen, like someone in the family getting sick and as parent do clean up pooh explosions, but we can make it better by giving ourselves time to view, address and reflect, and doing something like Self Care, which includes self development. This lighting a scented candel with a scent you love, with some chill out music.

Have an unplanned meal. Meal plans are good as I used to do this, but it is good to have a free choice meal day, for example and you do something not planned making meal time, even if the most of the day has been bad, good in the end.

This is where keeping a journal is good as this helps to view, address and reflect on those days and how you can learn from those days whenever they happen.

We can not control when a child or the whole family get sick all in one go, however much you sanitize and keep bad bacteria at bay, but will have a movie on or all go to bed early some days. Whenever I had a bad day when I was with him, I would go to bed when he did and often watch TV in bed together.

When I did this I would feel a lot better the next day and the thought “Well I got through that day and did I die?”, if you are reading this email after a bad day, then the answer is NO.

Set a date with yourself to take time out doing something different if you don’t often get to go out on your own. This can be meeting and going for a coffee with friend for lunch or going out in the evening, there is a drink with my name of on it mode, and go for that end of the week drink.

I loved it one time when on Fridays I would work up London, after a long week go to a bar afterwards and dance, sing on Karoake and paint the town red.

When the theatres open again, go and see a show, I love doing this, even if it is once or twice a year, even if it is a outdoor show, go and see it. Book that show, book a meal and take yourself out of the normal rushing week, and enjoy. I love seeing shows and I would recommend the Tina Turner Story show, Bat out of Hell and Chicago. I would go see these again, and even seen the stage show of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

Soon I will be working on some shows too in London at my favourite venues, Live at the Apollo and at the London Palladium and Hard Rock calling.

Remember those days where it is not going our way, that they won’t last long and there are still good days on the horizon. They always pass and take time to exhale and be with yourself to gather your thoughts and set a date to have a TV evening. I would often do this, Saturdays were mine as a kid and would watch endless shows, and Sundays would be seeing our friends in Fulham and Chelsea. It is good to see different; people some weeks, as we often just need a change of scene.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie L.M X

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