Tag Archives: life coaching blog

Life Coaching Programme “Summer Project 2023” Build your dreams: Not allowing others bad Actions, habits and unkind behaviour effect you and effect your dreams

26 Friday May 2023

Posted by in Dreams and ambitions, Everyday living, People, Personal Development, Positive Habits, Summer Project 2023, Weekly posts

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So yesterday was a day where some people were just being rude and reckless. First of all I let some guy pass me with his dog and got no thank you or acknowledgement, then a car pulled up close to the bus on the way home making the bus do a sudden stop, and then getting on the other bus I have to get on to go home, this person who got of the other bus aswell and get on the other decided to jump in front of me. This really annoyed me in that it did effect my mood. I made it clear to this guy that I wasn’t happy with what he had done and think of all the bad things I could do to make my case to him even more, but then thought to myself, “What would that achieve?”

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There are always going to be people who will test you, and like that guy getting on the bus, he won’t change, there will always be those who push in, and I found now that I get a bit like that too and push in front, but then I will rein myself in and wait. At the end of the day never allow others people’s actions rub off on you as it reminds me that I will give up my seat whenever other people won’t and will acknowledge other people who have waited for the bus before me. I am not a saint but I do believe that if you do good for people you will get rewarded and it just makes the world a better place to live.

When it comes to being a good citizen is to not to allow others bad habits rub off on you and show especially when you have kids how to behave even when someone has been unkind and what is the right thing. I have over reacted on some occasions, for example when I thought I had left Henry’s water bottle at his swimming class had to go back and a women had a go at me for having the door open to the outside and so I said “Have you never forgotten anything?” and called her a horrible person and then started to get super angry.

This effected me in thinking will I ever reach my dreams because of that incident, but actually makes me more determined and if she wants to be unkind then let her be and the best thing is to learn about what not to do and how to be if someone I see has forgotten something and would help them find it, rather than be rude because they have the door open for a second.

I will keep being good to others and not allow people who are unkind effect my habits towards others it just leads down the wrong road and can escalate to not wanting to go out and having a good day Working in a call centre was tough as you did get people calling you names on the phone and be rude from the moment you have picked up the call, and so you had to hold yourself together and not to take it personally. Yet I would go home feeling my blood boiling and take my mood out on my husband and it would effect his mood and this became a habit, and made me feel that my life isn’t going anywhere, when that wasn’t true It was actually motivating me to be stronger and learn how to help people that aren’t so nice. This would make me feel also “Stop being nice” but then would ask “What would that Achieve?” I like being kind to others, and not all calls were bad some just needed help and would be happy, so it wasn’t that bad and helped me be better socially and would respect those when I called a call centre be kinda and politer, and not allow others bad habits of behaviour affect me in chasing my dreams and move on in my life.

So don’t allow other people’s actions cause you to think there is no other life out there, but use these challenges to help you to conquer your dreams even more.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

Life Coaching Programme Summer Project 2023 Forever Growing: Developing your belief in yourself and what you can accomplish in your life

11 Thursday May 2023

Posted by in Dreams and ambitions, Everyday living, Friendships and relationships, People, Personal Development, Planning 2023, Summer Project 2023, Weekly posts

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So if you have dreams and ambitions then it is time to take action, but yourself belief has to be good because what you project you will receive back and so what is causing you to not believe in yourself? What is your self belief saying to you?

Keeping a journal and writing notes on how you feel about yourself can help and where did these feelings stem from?

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I have never been seen as clever or artistic, and school played a huge part in it. I remember when I did a school play a lot of the pupils at the school said how pretty I looked with make up on and so thought “Oh so I am not pretty without make up?” and it did make me feel sad, and then I was told by another girl when I was at secondary school that I am basically boring, because of keeping on about The Bill which was one of my favourite programmes on TV, but then she became a fan, and I didn’t resentful of shout, and respected her honesty and so I did stop, and it never became a slagging match but she would cause arguments so not sure of her true intentions but looking back I could be annoying and I could have been defensive but I wasn’t. I was not cool about it after school but now when thinking about it feel differently and I took it on board of what she was saying, and yes I could get on people’s nerves and it takes a lot to speak up and say it, so I stopped and didn’t see it as a personal attack, which could have happened but that she was being true and we still remained friends and still hung out, so I respected her for talking with me and talked it through rather then it lead to a disagreement.

Dwelling has played a huge part, and I think about what I could have done, when thinking about those events at school mentioned above, and thought perhaps I should have punched her on the nose but what good would that had done? I would have gotten detention and suspended so it wouldn’t have been worth it to lash out, instead I took it on the chin, and we carried on being friends as said, and she wasn’t saying she hated me and that we should stop being friends but was calm and I understood.

If they are being rude to you and just being spiteful, then rise above it and it tends to not be about you, but about them. Noone is your dictator but yourself and this doesn’t mean being ignorant and not listening to others but if they are vicious to you because in fact it can be their own insecurity that is talking and not actually you, is to say something like “Okay I heard you and thank you for your honesty and how you feel and will take your comments on board and will stop doing, I am sorry it annoyed you”.

In order to build our belief with our self we need to listen to others and when they compliment you never throw it back into their face, and use it to build your mindset of seeing that you are an amazing person with a good heart and mind, and good that people look up to you, because people do, and when someone wanted to join me when I began to do running or walking for charity, it really made me feel amazing and rewarding.

I have accomplished a lot in my life now at the age of 44 and there is still more I want to achieve, but I have had to do some work on my mental health and self belief. I have had to stop being afraid and take risks and learned from my mistakes and get rid of scars and keep moving forward.

I never thought I would run a half marathon but I have and it was tough and I was done by the 5th mile but I kept on going and struggled to walk the next day but still did it and felt so amazing and surprised in what my body can do. I carried a child in my tummy, I inspired others in doing my runs and walks to fundraise as said, and made a difference in peoples lives.

When I see ticks on my lists is an accomplishment and another step for me to grow and learn and continue to build my knowledge and understanding of life and where I want to go, and where I want them to lead to..I want to get back into doing charity walks and runs, and so I try to do some walking each day and when my son goes out on his scooter will run. I want to finish my next book, so been doing a bit of writing each day, and I want to help my son with his learning so will make it a must on a Sunday for him to do his homework and do some extra learning when at home, by playing different games and want to set a good example for my son, as he has helped me to grow and get to grips with my life, and self belief.

Stop being resentful I wrote a blog check out for this section of my life coaching programme called Life Coaching Programme Summer Project 2023 Forever Growing: Learning to control my Thoughts and Actions That will only soul destroy but make their accomplishments a way to build yours as if they can do it then so can you.

Sometimes we have to learn to lead others and felt I did that when it came to doing dancing, which I did until I was 16 and looking for work when I left school and then like I say go into to running and walking to raise money for charity. I did football coaching which was a dream I had and enjoyed it and would like to do that again as it was rewarding and then worked at a holiday camp which is something I wanted to do as a kid and I feel proud in myself in that I did that and as said there is still so much I want to do and to do that I have to have self belief, and so do you.

So lets build up our lives to help build others lives too and believe in conquering your dreams.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

Life Coaching Programme Summer Project 2023 Forever Growing: Learning to control my Thoughts and Actions

08 Monday May 2023

Posted by in Everyday living, Friendships and relationships, Personal Development, Positive Habits, Summer Project 2023, Weekly posts

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When it comes to our growth we find that often our actions were unreasonable and it is too late to heal them, and say sorry.Yet it is never too late. If you have had a mental illness it can affect how we are with other people, but shouldn’t be an excuse to be unkind, It can be because we feel that we are being misunderstood and want people to resonate with how we are feeling and that our love ones can read our minds.

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A lot of it is fear, like I get worried when I am on a bus and someone sits next to me. I know I have paid for one seat but instantly my mind will go through the image of what if this person won’t let me pass to get off the bus, and I think this is from when I would travel from Wimbledon to Kingston the person next to me made me wait until he was ready to get up and because he was getting off too, and need to not allow that experience to be in fear of others but use it to learn and if I know my stop is next I will say excuse me and if they are getting off the same stop it has been fine.

With psychosis you can get paranoid and think that everyone is against you, when that is not the case, a lot of the time and when once at work I thought my team manager had said something rude about me and it upset me, I spoke to her after thinking about in tears and it was fine, I miss heard. The one thing is to not be confrontational and just talk not throwing accusations and “You said this and you said that”, but how there actions have made you feel and how you and them can rebuild the relationship to heal the wounds of there and our actions.

When we are stressed we can project our feelings towards those that are close to us and find it hard when we aren’t happy to see someone happy when we aren’t and you can get competitive over who’s life is the worst and feel like we are hitting a brick wall, and if it is something we don’t want to hear when often we need to hear it, it can make us even more resentful.

It used to eat away with me when I felt like this and feel insignificant, but it is not their fault and the question I ask now is whenever these feelings are being triggered, “Do I want people to be unhappy?” and “Do we want them to feel that way about me?”and would reply of course not. I want the best for other people and helps us to see how we can be as happy as they are. We are in charge of our own happiness and the feelings we project and to build a relationship with ourselves is to admit we are wrong and instead of waiting to see if someone is nice to you, be the first one to make the move and if I see someone wearing a nice piece of clothing or their style, even strangers I will say and I like complimenting others, not for someone to like me back, but just saying it but have meaning and so I have had to amend my ways and it is taken a lot but it’s as if I have woken up and realised I have nothing to be resentful for or angry about, and be thankful of what I have.

I have been there and said the wrong thing, and it is not really what I did but how I have come across and see it from their perspective and learned, and thought “How could I have reacted that would have been better” and be more aware of my actions and feel towards someone.

I have created a video on my main youtube channel of what I will be talking about within this years programme and so click here to watch, if you would like: https://youtu.be/mbAJQtjpZ68

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

Life Coaching Programme Summer Project 2023 Forever Growing: Learning from our kids and not getting overwhelmed in your life

04 Thursday May 2023

Posted by in Everyday living, Personal Development, Positive Habits, productivity, Summer Project 2023, Weekly posts

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As humans we are always growing and as we go through life with each age and milestones our view on life and the world can change. I now see that life is to be worshipped and enjoyed rather than dreaded and resented because someone is doing better than you and wishing our life away. Worrying we aren’t meeting other peoples expectations of us and that life is hard all the time.

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As a kid I couldn’t wait to be an adult as it meant that I can do my own thing and make my own choices but you can do that as a child too. As a kid it was seen by many that Children don’t know their own minds but yes they do, and I think we underestimate our children and what they are capable of, and my son is so technically savvy that he could control a cashier desk without needing to be shown, because he just naturally savvy when it comes to electronics and so I have to watch him to be able to be technically savvy myself. When we play he will tell me where to stand and give me direction and correct me if I say something wrong, like if I say pants when he is wearing shorts, will say “No they are’t pants they are shorts, don’t do it again”.

I see that with kids they take tiny steps, like they will tempt to roll over several times before they can do it and then will begin to pull themselves up on all fours and then try and crawl. Some kids can go from being on fours to walking skipping the crawling but it will as they develop take time and we should never rush them but give space for our kids to grow to help us grow too. I think as adults we feel pressure to do so many things at once and then wonder why we have no energy and depriving ourselves from luxury as our family grows. Never neglect your own wellbeing and growth, so we can be good role model to others, like our kids and ask for help if you are finding things a struggle. Often we feel like, there is nothing to worry about, but it is if you can’t face the days ahead and you begin to have a break down.

Allow some time to relax and give yourself some space. Take on other peoples help, like other mums who have experience and meet or facetime and get tips and advice. I write a parenting blog if you’d like to check it out: https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.com

So I am now all about taking my time. I have to take little breaks and find it hard to concentrate if I don’t. It is all about taking your time and breaking your to do’s down and allocate days to get things done and if things are getting too much then to keep growing, rein yourself in, reflect and then make changes as you continue to grow.

It is good to have a good foundation around you that can help you grow but you have to do it for yourself too. You are on this planet for a reason so spend time to find out what it is. Look at what areas are you happy with in your life and what you are not happy with and take action to change so they become something you do like.

I don’t like tidying so I will do as the first thing when I get up, this helps to kick the day off and I make sure that the things I need daily are easily accessible and use waiting time, Example:I will when waiting for a bus or train to go through my emails rather than avoid them and is an area I have to change, so made it my goal to check my emails everyday and unsubscribe if there are ones from companies that no longer serve any purpose to me, and help reduce my emails, so they are manageable and I stop me from feeling overwhelmed.

My son is never overwhelmed and wants to be doing something in the days otherwise he start to muck about and he helps keep me fit and active by playing sports or when he is watching his tablet will push me away and want to be in his on space and I respect that.

I have learned a lot about how my actions are when it comes to my son and if he asks me to put my phone down I will as being a mum I love that he wants my full attention, and I have wised up.

I hope you like this blog and if you’d like to be kept up to date with my blogs on this site you can by following me, and your feedback means a lot.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

February 2023 Newsletter

20 Monday Feb 2023

Posted by in Books, Goal setting, monthly challenges to manage my work, Monthly Newsletter, Personal Development, Planning 2023, Positive Habits

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Hi its that time of the month for my Monthly Newsletter which has details of what I have been doing and what is to come within my content. I talk about monthly challenge for February and about setting goals, targets and habits. See it below which you can download.

february-2023-newsletterDownload

I really hope you enjoy reading it, your feedback means the world to me, and more to come in 2023.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

@typicallondongal

My June Newsletter/Get ready for Summertime

24 Friday Jun 2022

Posted by in Monthly Newsletter, Personal Development, Positive Habits

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Hello, here is my new Newsletter for June 2022, it talks about the Platinum Jubilee and what is to come now we are in Summer and is free to view and about my Life Coaching programme “Summer Project 2022”.

first-weekly-newsletter-june-2022Download

I hope you are enjoying these newsletters and if you’d like to give feedback, then please do, and if you want to know when a new blog goes up on this site, then remember to follow and you will receive updates as I continue to write new content and publish them.

Many thanks for those following me and liking my blogs, it really means the world to me.

Carrie X

Life Coaching/”2022 Project”/Monday Reset will I get it done?

19 Sunday Jun 2022

Posted by in 2022 Programme Life coaching blogs, Dreams and ambitions, Everyday living, Personal Development, Positive Habits, Weekly posts

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It Sunday evening and I am in my bedroom and aswell as listening to a chat of Fearn Cotton and Sara Fox, and I have been challenging myself this month to sort out one area a day in my life, including my blogs and social media sites, and tomorrow I want to do each Monday a Reset, and do my laundry, Vacuum and change my bedding and have a really good morning reset to begin the week.

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Yet as soon as I think of it the energy in doing these tasks, puts me off. I know I will be like, “I’ll do it once I have had my first cup of tea”, “Oh let me just watch this Youtube video and I’ll get it done”, are you the same? Comment below.

I also need to call the doctors because I have a swollen eye due to Hayfever, and has been really sore, and only just remembered that, as I write this blog post. I know I can do a reset, but especially in the morning I am going to have to really push myself to get out of the bed to do anything. Yet last week before I had my first cuppa and breakfast did a sort out of my clothes. Seeing the result made it worth it. I know I am going to be nervous about calling the doctors, because it is so hard to get an appointment and means putting other stuff off, and I don’t like bothering my doctor. Its the mindset of “It’s only a swollen eye I am sure it will go”, but who knows.

I am guilty of putting things off, example I bought Henry, my son a new pair of shorts from Sainsbury’s but they are too small and so have to take them back, but I haven’t. However I have decided to keep them and donate them, and will get my son another pair. I have learned that if I don’t take them back they will still be good for someone else to wear and done my bit for charity. So I don’t feel that bad about them not being returned.

“You’ll find ways to get it done and still see results”

I am a one bit at a time person and hate rushing. I have to stop myself from jumping in with both feet, because I get overwhelmed. It means slowing down, but a moderate pace.

Do you do reset each week or perhaps everyday? Where to you begin?

For me it has to be in eye view, and of course I am not going to vacuum as soon as I wake up, which is usually around about 5am, as I know it wouldn’t be appreciated. So it will have to be a sociable hour around 8am, or is that too early? Anyway I will get up and start once I know I am not going to disturb anyone else and get it done.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

Life Coaching/”2022 Project”/When you mess up?

10 Friday Jun 2022

Posted by in 2022 Programme Life coaching blogs, Everyday living, Personal Development, Weekly posts

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Well where do I begin. Yes what to do When you mess up?

I have messed up a lot, like when I was working for a Marketing company, my first full-time job and was an Office Junior, sent a load of books which had peoples names on them, didn’t see them and sent them to the wrong person. My heart sunk and then I was helping with Printing out sheets for a project and printed a load of them to the point the documents all over the place.

We all can mess up, and get things wrong but it is how to deal with it that will help you so continue to grow in your life, and remember “We are all human” we will get it wrong.

The powerful thing you can do is to admit it not run away.

The feelings you get when you mess up is gut wrenching and like “How do I deal with this and turn it around so I prevent it from happening again?” and make it right. For me it is “Can this be fixed?”

Yes it can. I analyse a lot and it drives me mad, as I have done some stupid things and yet I still kept a roof over my head and I have achieved things in my life. I would call myself a lot a nightmare, but really its reality. I find it hard to deal with.

I have questioned my life and why I keep messing up?

I think because I don’t often feel worthy and imposter syndrome and that there things I do still like to have in my life and scared of “What if I never get the chance?”.

Yet this is someone who has achieved a lot and even writing that, I hear the voice saying “Really, your not supposed to feel like that and that is being big headed”.

Do you ever feel this way?

It’s the voice of doubt and the one that can stop me in my tracks sometimes, but I have a way to deal with the inner critic, and is “Hear it, talk to it and push it away”.

We have all made a mess in our lives, and that it can be rectified. It’s believing in yourself and not be so harsh on yourself.

It can become draining, and so putting the gut wrenching feeling when you mess up, is to say “Ok I didn’t get it right this time, but I will and this is going to make me stronger” and it has.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

Life Coaching/Investing in coffee/Saving on coffee/Financial living

30 Monday May 2022

Posted by in 2022 Programme Life coaching blogs, Everyday living, Financial Living, Personal Development, Positive Habits, Weekly posts

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Today I had an appointment to got to early and so because I was early thought I’d get a coffee and had a muffin…but issue:

My Latte was cold, and no not an Iced Coffee, and so I had to take it back and they put in hot water, and having a new habit, not buying a coffee out as much has made a huge saving. I have a coffee machine where I live so I have been using it, I’ve kept a jar of coffee over in my sons home, where he lives with his dad, and so when I go over there I will have a coffee there, and it has blown my mind, that it just takes one new habit that can turn a corner in your life. Making one change, one habit, has been elevating.

I have written an EBook called: Things to Change one day at a time and just by altering your routine and positive habits bit by bit can really change how you live, how you feel and how others see you. I want to be reliable and practice what I preach, and now I don’t sleep with my phone, and I have cold showers, and so I have been getting up early and not changing my alarm time set, and I get up dressed with my cup of tea and then coffee at home, and that begins my day on a high, rather than scraping myself off the bed.

Life has a purpose. Live by your means and with every bit of life that needs changing, do it. If it going to make you happy, smile and wake up with full energy, then it is totally worth it.

I am making videos for my life coaching programme on my Youtube channel and have new one to upload and this will be up this week: https://studio.youtube.com/channel/UCUDFIqjVKLy7NhtcR6Hy0Tg I also have updated my Pinterest with videos and tips for my Life Coaching programme “2022 Project”: https://www.pinterest.co.uk/thetypicalLondongal/2022-project-life-coaching-tools-and-information/

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

Life Coaching/Being strong and guided

12 Thursday May 2022

Posted by in 2022 Programme Life coaching blogs, Boundaries, Everyday living, friendship, Friendships and relationships, Personal Development, Weekly posts

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Hello this another Life Coaching video as part of my Life Coaching programme, “2022 Project”, helping you to have a happier life and a year.

To get to grips with your life, it is good to be strong and guided. This time last year I was in a Mental Health hospital and wished I had known about these places as I would have checked myself in, as like many I found the lockdowns we had, was effecting my mental health, by not being able to go out and explore, and I love walking and visiting different places, but due to Lockdown I couldn’t.

  1. Develop your understanding of what is good in your life and why and what is not, and do you want to be good or the bad?
  2. Never Promise if you can’t deliver, because there is such a thing as false promises and when we don’t follow through we feel failure. Doing is better than promising.
  3. Develop a life that is personal to you. So now I am back walking again, long distances and as soon as I see people running, I feel I am not doing enough, yet walking is just as good and so don’t do things just because of other people but what will benefit you
  4. Get in touch with your spirituality. I have had a tough nine years where I allowed my mental health dictate my life and not getting in touch with myself and so began praying again, because, for me that helps and I listen to my soul and gut rather than my heart and mind
  5. Stop comparing. I should hold a reward for this because I am guilty as sin. I have learnt and I do what suits me and love myself, rather than looking at someone else and feel inadequate
  6. Creating different systems. This came from watching Mel Robbins Reset, check it out, and if you want to remember something like a pair of shoes for walking, I put them out so I can slip them on and go. Being a parent I would make sure I had items I could grab and go, as hate forgetting. Sorry what was that, I said, I don’t like forgetting, so leave items in full view so I know I will remember
  7. Create good patterns. I now make sure I set an alarm in the mornings, to make sure I have a good sleep pattern, as 4 hours sleep which I used to sleep for, did me no good and so I now go to bed between 8 and 9pm and wake up by 8:30am. I don’t have lunch until I go over to my son’s house to wait for him to return from school and stops me snacking and I love reading my book whilst travelling, as i learn a lot this way
  8. Give back what others have given you. I do this by thanking the bus driver for taking me safely to my last stop, I will buy nice cards and presents for family and what I do need to do is remember to write thank you cards, as I always forget and so will make an effort to do this, and feeling bad from not doing so.
  9. Get rid of anger by making changes in your life. Example hating your job, and feel you don’t connect with the people you work with. Look for a new place to work that has a better atmosphere. I had jobs like this, when working for a computer company, and there was a lot of back stabbing and felt so uncomfortable so I left, and followed my dream to work at a Holiday camp and finally got the chance, to leave my old life in London and Surrey for the south coast and was a brilliant experience.
  10. Make yourself be heard, Staying silent never helps and so set boundaries, making it clear of what they are. and stand your ground. This is not contradicting number 9, as you can do this to prevent anger, but just sitting and talking to people and teach others to do the same. Sitting having a conversation about what upsets us, rather than a shouting match.

It is all about keeping your head held high and to realise your value, and that you have a part to play in this world just like everyone else.

I have filmed for my Youtube channel: Typical London Gal, of some Life Coaching videos so go and check these out, this too and creating a board on Pinterest too: https://www.pinterest.co.uk/thetypicalLondongal/2022-project-life-coaching-tools-and-information/

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X