Are you ready to make some changes in your life? I am and started a Reset for 2023, starting with tidying my desk that I use for writing, doing courses and as a dressing table and so needs to be functional and has everything placed at arms length.
So check out my video and remember if you Subscribe to my Youtube channel you will notified of when I put up a new video and currently put up 2 to 3 videos a week.
This means sorting certain areas of my life and really helps to get different projects and tasks done and really helps achieve my goals.
I hope you like this video and there is more content to come.
When we get off a train it is because we want to go to a known destination and an idea of where we want to go, but with life there are stations we never get off on, because we have no need too, but often when I used to travel into the central London, would forget where I was going or I’d be trying to keep my eyes open, missed my stop. I’d get into a panic state because now I have no idea of where I am going and the fear was getting stranded and so now I travel I often will be looking at the map on the train, numerous times to make sure that I get off the right station.
So what happens when we forget and miss our stops?
Be glad that I had realised and didn’t travel any further and hope I can get back where I forgot to get off to go too the right destination? I would instantly get panicky and feel really stupid, and start to demolish myself. Yet if someone actually said these things to me and not in my head, I would be like “No you are wrong and I am not the only who’s done that”, but its fine to say it to ourselves.
We have all got off the wrong stop, and we will make mistakes which I did a video on, which was a chat video: https://youtu.be/SUw2pGZlPoI All about when my son had a new teacher teaching him swimming and one of the dads got a bit annoyed about it, as she wasn’t as thorough unlike the usual teacher and was being supervised whilst she taught, but did okay and we all make mistakes.
Did she panic? No
Did she get angry? No
She got on and taught her lesson, and the kids learning including my son, were fine. So getting off the wrong stop doesn’t mean your going to be stuck forever, you learn, THAT IS LIFE, and you will still be a success and you’ll know soon where to get off and get on. As Dean Graziosi, life is about repetition, and so as keep doing the journey you’ll always know, and when you do, then the panic will fade.
Do you feel sometimes that life is full of errands, like doing laundry, cleaning, checking my finances, packing for the school holidays and on emails, that you avoid these tasks?
Yes my hands are up, and I think its because we build too much of hard expectation of ourselves and it usually because we are pleasing others in doing so. I mean we pay our debts because we began not to care anymore about where it is going, and have a load of books still to be returned to the library, but know we are pissing off the bank we are debt with, and return our books to stop the library being annoyed with us and avoid visiting, and not because we actually want to be these things off.
Of course these things need to be done, because of our own insanity and we don’t want these things hanging around our heads, growing and know we want them to be gone. You feel begrudging about the bills you have to pay. So what is the answer?
Well do we want to be debt for the rest of our lives and still have those library books? Of course not and so set a date and each day go through what will help face them to get them done. Create a plan and a goal.
I have used a bit of paper on my wall and set myself a target of paying off my credit card and plan my finances of what needs to come out and what I want to come out. I also go through where I can save money, by going to parks which are free to use, not always having a coffee out and if it a store I use of the time do they have points cards that would lower the amount you pay, like Boots for example I love their points system and use the points I build up on items from their stores.
I enjoy setting myself goals and I do it bit by bit, rather than all in one go.
Invest in what you want and not what you don’t. Go through the things in your life that makes you avoid errands and can you delegate? I am no good at making beds, but I do it because it does help set up my day, but if someone offers, of course I am not going to say no. and the same with having a reset each week. I find that I avoid them because I make them bigger than what they are, rather than seeing that it is not a hard task. Example: Worried about getting up to London and not being up there on time.
So I packed my bag the night before, saw a cash machine on route yesterday as took my son to Wimbledon park, and withdrew some cash and checked the trains the night before and then in the morning, set an alarm and just prepared myself.
Separate errands into sections, and think about how you will feel once the task is done and what it will lead to. I know when I complete tasks I feel a buzzed and that the preparation is the the key.
So don’t avoid get them done, do them but then reward yourself, very important and then go onto the things you want to do and do one together. Example when I have written a blog, I reward myself with watching a video, which is what I want to do, because I love writing blogs, but often will be my own worst critic and editing it can be a process, but I feel really good afterwards and so will then watch a bit of TV, what I want to do. If someone could in help me with editing I would be truly thankful.
It’s all about balance and not getting left behind, as this can be a factor, the time you have.
So break things down, prep and break each task down so its not such a burden to get the errands we plan done and make it enjoyable, example when I write I may listen to a podcast or music, with a cup of tea or coffee, have the window open and wear a favourites T-Shirt, anything that helps boost your enthusiasm to get errands completed so you and focus on the want items.
It is all about living life and making the most of it, why we have it.
Well where do I begin. Yes what to do When you mess up?
I have messed up a lot, like when I was working for a Marketing company, my first full-time job and was an Office Junior, sent a load of books which had peoples names on them, didn’t see them and sent them to the wrong person. My heart sunk and then I was helping with Printing out sheets for a project and printed a load of them to the point the documents all over the place.
We all can mess up, and get things wrong but it is how to deal with it that will help you so continue to grow in your life, and remember “We are all human” we will get it wrong.
The powerful thing you can do is to admit it not run away.
The feelings you get when you mess up is gut wrenching and like “How do I deal with this and turn it around so I prevent it from happening again?” and make it right. For me it is “Can this be fixed?”
Yes it can. I analyse a lot and it drives me mad, as I have done some stupid things and yet I still kept a roof over my head and I have achieved things in my life. I would call myself a lot a nightmare, but really its reality. I find it hard to deal with.
I have questioned my life and why I keep messing up?
I think because I don’t often feel worthy and imposter syndrome and that there things I do still like to have in my life and scared of “What if I never get the chance?”.
Yet this is someone who has achieved a lot and even writing that, I hear the voice saying “Really, your not supposed to feel like that and that is being big headed”.
Do you ever feel this way?
It’s the voice of doubt and the one that can stop me in my tracks sometimes, but I have a way to deal with the inner critic, and is “Hear it, talk to it and push it away”.
We have all made a mess in our lives, and that it can be rectified. It’s believing in yourself and not be so harsh on yourself.
It can become draining, and so putting the gut wrenching feeling when you mess up, is to say “Ok I didn’t get it right this time, but I will and this is going to make me stronger” and it has.
I never thought I’d be reaching this point in my life, if you’d had seen me last year, spending time in a mental health hospital, yet here I am with over a hundred followers, so thank you for the time you have spent on reading my blogs, it is truly touching and drives me to create more that reach out to you and that you find them helpful to you.
As I write this blog I am listening to the song “Wind of change” brilliant song, and I want to be able to whistle in tune and learn how to play electric guitar. So that is a new habit I have created there, lets see if it happens. I will let you know.
Habits can last a life time, but they have to benefit you. I want to whistle so I can write more songs. as I do like to write music and still have that ambition of wanting a song I have written on the radio, and is a dream that never goes away.
I have just recently been doing new habits, not having my phone near my bed until the next day to put it on charge, but not at night. This has been uplifting and now I know that this will be a new one I know I will follow through with, along with making bed, which I had been trying to do, but never kept but now it is a must, to not attempt me to get back into it.
I have also been doing my indoor workouts, and it is good to get in touch with your body and just stretching, lifting weights and walking, really makes a massive change in the way I think and see myself, the human body is amazing of what it can do, so get in touch with it. Take up a skill that you’ve been wanting and get into the habit, and not rush into it. TAKE YOUR TIME!
Keep them relevant to what you want to achieve by following new habits and feel. That is important, like not driving everyday to work, but walk on some days, to save money on petrol, to then use that money to save for something else.
The other habit I have been doing, is taking off my make up with a wet hot flannel and feels so good, and really has made a difference to my skin, not getting dry and I just use hot water from the tap, and in the mornings, I will use my face wash. So it is little habits like that one, that can make a difference to how you live your life.
So get a pen and a pad and write about the habits you do and what others that will help you, and pick ones that you can begin right away. If they make you excited and happy, then they are working.
Are you worried about rushing into things, like taking a promotion at work?
You’d like to go for it but something is holding you back.
Evaluate and write down the fears and take time to go through your worries and concerns, and what would help you overcome these fears you are having.
You may be thinking would I have to do extra hours?
Would I be able to earn more money?
Would it require working on different days unlike what I do now?
Would I cope with the promotion and am I capable of leading a team?
Perhaps you want to write a book, but you feel you are incapable and that you feel you can’t compete with other writers.
Use these fears to push yourself into gear and be in the mindset that YOU CAN DO ANYTHING!
Life is full of chances to change your life, for example I have unknown to me got more followers on Pinterest and it meant adding more content to the pins that I have worked on and its building and building yourself that you need to focus on. Facing your fears of what is stopping you,
THE NEED TO BE DEALT WITH!
Just start by writing and answering the above questions.
Begin to picture yourself writing the book or taking the promotion you really want to go for, and write one thing that would push you forward.
If you want to write a book, start by jotting down notes and your ideas. Imagine yourself writing the book, picture the scene of the book, like you would when watching a movie.
Start building and putting together the reason why you want to go for the promotion or write a book how will it improve you life?
Perhaps you feel you can’t write a book because you don’t read books, then there is no time like the present to begin reading books. It really helps when putting your own book together, and finding the style that works for you.
If you get a promotion and your worried that the relationship with your colleagues are gonna change towards you, then,
sit them down and have a meeting about it, even if it is one to one
tell them your plans in what things you want to help your colleagues with,
how the relationship with them will grow so there are no barriers between you and them.
Who around you inspires you?
It could be a friend
a family member or
someone you see on the TV,
what they bring to the table that you like
how can you implement their way of being into your own.
You can be inspired by other people, without feeling jealousy and begrudging. I want to see people do well, and if you support them they will do the same. It may take time but if you know what it is you want in life and know how this person makes you feel, then follow their path, not copy, but what things they teach you that you can add to your life for you to be just a successful.
I feel inspired listening to Celine Dion, and love her music and she went through a transition where she learned to speak English, had teeth surgery and altered her image, because Rene who was her manager and then became her husband, knew that for her to be in music and not be mocked by the press she would need changes that will help her grow as an artist and now sells billion records all over the world.
I have now changed my habits and implemented new ones:
I always make sure I have breakfast
Go walking and playing football and walks with my son
I read books whilst travelling to and from my sons home
Have night off on Saturdays and being away from my phone
Spend time doing colouring
Sunday is my training day where I will watch training videos on Youtube like Sara Cannon and Natalia Leigh who do videos about their life as self published authors
Keep tabs on my finances and making sure any bills due are paid and save as much as possible
It all adds to push yourself confidence and perhaps you feel you need more education to go for the promotion, and speak your superior as I did this working for an entertainments company where I would book tickets for people wanting to go to visit theme parks and I was struggling to remember the details I need to check to book tickets and so I spoke to my coach who gave me further training.
If you don’t ask you don’t get.
And be your own teacher to build your knowledge and make a time or day to do some self training if you knowledge is not up to scratch and will help push you forward to going for that promotion and never feel you can’t compete, because YES YOU CAN!
So because I had a meeting today, I thought I’d go over to my sons dads house by train, I usually travel by bus as I left the station I suddenly see a drip and on my brand new scarf was bird pooh.
Some people used to say that bird pooh was lucky, but did I feel lucky when it happened today en route? NO!
What I do believe is that there are things that happen which is hard to escape and how many can say they have had bird pooh on them too and did you get good luck?
I’d like you to leave a comment below if you have, and I will see what happens, whilst I put my new scarf not had for a full week yet, now into the wash.
Is life about being lucky?
In my opinion yes. because twice now I had lost my son’s swimming hat and goggles and worried about them and searching my bedroom where I thought they were and then having to see if I could buy a new pair easily but couldn’t, as I was getting Henry changed, someone had hung them on the hook of the womens changing room and so going by what happened and it wasn’t like I had enough time this was on the day and hour before my son’s class. I put that down to luck and reminds me that there are angels in our world as who would have guessed that someone would do that.
I do believe in God and always have and feel guided more so than now, but he can’t control everything but does his best to help you. That is my opinion anyway and yet, I do respect those who think differently.
Can you create what luckyou receive?
From experience yes. Life is about choice and what you want to come your way. Being a mum I have had to manage my life differently and if I had not gone around to the hospital that luckily we lived next door my son, may not have survived as his heartrate began to drop, so reacting correctly he was born safely and now is 8 years old, going onto 9, so I know I made the right choice that even at 31 weeks knew I had to go to the hospital rather then staying indoors worrying.
We create our own destiny but can’t help all events in our lives but having a bit of luck can help, and when I do get luck don’t take it for granted, and so for me if I don’t win the lottery as I need a ticket to do so, I would put it down to pure bad luck.
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On the way back from a Mother and Toddler group I checked out one of the buses which go passed the station for when I started a new job. This was about 7 years ago.
At the bus stop this lady approached and she wanted to see Henry and started shaking him not roughly and she got a bit worried because he was zonked out, and says “Whats the matter he woke wake up” and so I applied “He’s okay just a sleep” and I didn’t get alarmed but was sad for her as she must have witness a child not waking up hence why she panicked.
She did look like she had a few too many alcoholic drinks but not knowing her I didn’t get cross and just moved on. I don’t know this lady and it is surprising how people can be having more of a bad time to worry for other people and children.
We do need to be respectful as noone knows what someones been through to be alarmed, and she did look like she had troubles and so if you see someone who is different to the norm, try not to judge because they are doing it based on their life. If they wish to talk then let them.
I didn’t feel threatened by this lady’s actions and could see the anxiety she had and we do need to stop judging people.