Today I have a few videos to be edited and uploaded, yet right now I don’t feel like it. Not because I don’t like the videos, because I do. It is about “Will my laptop shut down when I try?” as it is a bit temperamental and feel like I want a day off, which once I can get into the right mindset I know I will get it done.
I tend to feel like this each morning because of self doubt of “Am I capable?”. It is only a video some may say but for me it is the process of listening to myself that stops me in my tracks to ask “Is it good enough?”, “Will people like it?”. Imposter syndrome is very common and I feel it a lot at times, and have to remind myself that “I am good enough” and “I am worth it”, but I find it so hard to say because of how much others are doing compared to me.
That needs to stop I know so I allow myself to get bits done but with a break and as I get through the morning feel better, because I know this is just a habit I have got myself in and can be detoured by just acting not thinking.
The more I think about it the more I resist it, so I just need to “Bite the bullet” and get it done, and that is the answer. No more dwelling but doing.
So lets take action today. Do you ever feel like this? Leave a comment below.
I now use Sundays as a Reset and it really gives a kick start to the week ahead. I am not a massive fan of cleaning and so it does take a long to get myself to do it, but feel good once done and seen the results.
I use Sundays and Mondays to reset and that is clearing rubbish, go through lists not completed and just go through what I have done and what I do next.
It revaluates your life, as you can see what area of my life you need to work on, example for me I need to fit in time exercise more, and so I will go for a walk each day and once I get the message “Do a workout” that is exactly what I will do, and you can use exercise to reset your life.
Exercising has so many benefits. Example I find it gives me a good boost of energy and feel good about my body and how I feel about myself. I will make sure I give myself time to look after my skin and going through what I have that I still love and what I don’t.
I will vacuum my bedroom each week and do a bit of dusting, and just getting things in shape. I like space and allow myself time to gather my life and keep growing.
Spend time to journal and gather my thoughts and fears. Have time changing my bedding and just spend time working and building on different areas of my life.
It can be anything that is making you feel overwhelmed and you need more shape in your life.
So have time to reset your life and help you be in a positive mindset.
When we get off a train it is because we want to go to a known destination and an idea of where we want to go, but with life there are stations we never get off on, because we have no need too, but often when I used to travel into the central London, would forget where I was going or I’d be trying to keep my eyes open, missed my stop. I’d get into a panic state because now I have no idea of where I am going and the fear was getting stranded and so now I travel I often will be looking at the map on the train, numerous times to make sure that I get off the right station.
So what happens when we forget and miss our stops?
Be glad that I had realised and didn’t travel any further and hope I can get back where I forgot to get off to go too the right destination? I would instantly get panicky and feel really stupid, and start to demolish myself. Yet if someone actually said these things to me and not in my head, I would be like “No you are wrong and I am not the only who’s done that”, but its fine to say it to ourselves.
We have all got off the wrong stop, and we will make mistakes which I did a video on, which was a chat video: https://youtu.be/SUw2pGZlPoI All about when my son had a new teacher teaching him swimming and one of the dads got a bit annoyed about it, as she wasn’t as thorough unlike the usual teacher and was being supervised whilst she taught, but did okay and we all make mistakes.
Did she panic? No
Did she get angry? No
She got on and taught her lesson, and the kids learning including my son, were fine. So getting off the wrong stop doesn’t mean your going to be stuck forever, you learn, THAT IS LIFE, and you will still be a success and you’ll know soon where to get off and get on. As Dean Graziosi, life is about repetition, and so as keep doing the journey you’ll always know, and when you do, then the panic will fade.
As a kid I always knew that I wanted to do something that was different to those before me being an estate kid, did with their lives. As a kid I was full of ambition, and loved dancing and wanted to be a pop star one day or be on stage in a musical. Well I did have a chance as I did when I was very young did tap and ballet classes and take part in shows, and then went onto doing ballroom and latin dancing.
They came about because of other kids I knew and it gave me a reason to get out of bed, then I stopped and then fell in love with football and changed my mind of who I wanted to be, and felt a new world had shown itself and was what I wanted to do instead.
I would dream about playing football, but actually it wasn’t that I wanted to play, but build my knowledge and wanted to be a football coach, and years later did my level FA coaching qualification at Richmond college, and did get a chance to coach. Then I fell pregnant so had to stop, as I didn’t drive and couldn’t carry my stuff with me, and it turned out to be a good decision, because in the end it was traumatic when Henry, my son arrived, and would like to continue again, but I then discovered the internet and his many things you can do on it, and began a blog.
This with a few of my other blogs I began to write, was one of my first, and feel this is now who I want to be. I want to be a blogger and full time writer. It can take its time, to choose who you want to be, and I want to be known for my blogs and help get in touch with people who I can help through my blogs.
I then began to write books and who I want to be. I do still see myself as a estate kid and has had a influence on me, because it was a huge part of me still. I am a mum and love it, my son is the biggest I could have wished for and is who I want to be.
I get a buzz when my son calls me mummy and gives me hugs and tells me he loves me, and is such a gorgeous boy, Is that being biased? Probably, but is it? I mean he is my pride and joy, and he is adorable and people comment on him saying how he is so friendly and gorgeous he is. He makes me laugh like noone else and we have a bond that is out of this world, and feel good about being a mum. Yes there are challenges, but life is about growing, if we limit ourselves that is always going to the case, so we have to come across challenges as this how we become who we are.
So who do you want to be? Start building your life and never fear it.
To let you know I did a new video talking about my last blog about having lazy days and habits leading to habits so, check it out: https://youtu.be/QHzxtk2-0LE
I will be making these blogs and videos into an Online course, as I did last year, and if you’d like to check my Online courses out I have linked to my page: Online Courses/Education
Do you feel sometimes that life is full of errands, like doing laundry, cleaning, checking my finances, packing for the school holidays and on emails, that you avoid these tasks?
Yes my hands are up, and I think its because we build too much of hard expectation of ourselves and it usually because we are pleasing others in doing so. I mean we pay our debts because we began not to care anymore about where it is going, and have a load of books still to be returned to the library, but know we are pissing off the bank we are debt with, and return our books to stop the library being annoyed with us and avoid visiting, and not because we actually want to be these things off.
Of course these things need to be done, because of our own insanity and we don’t want these things hanging around our heads, growing and know we want them to be gone. You feel begrudging about the bills you have to pay. So what is the answer?
Well do we want to be debt for the rest of our lives and still have those library books? Of course not and so set a date and each day go through what will help face them to get them done. Create a plan and a goal.
I have used a bit of paper on my wall and set myself a target of paying off my credit card and plan my finances of what needs to come out and what I want to come out. I also go through where I can save money, by going to parks which are free to use, not always having a coffee out and if it a store I use of the time do they have points cards that would lower the amount you pay, like Boots for example I love their points system and use the points I build up on items from their stores.
I enjoy setting myself goals and I do it bit by bit, rather than all in one go.
Invest in what you want and not what you don’t. Go through the things in your life that makes you avoid errands and can you delegate? I am no good at making beds, but I do it because it does help set up my day, but if someone offers, of course I am not going to say no. and the same with having a reset each week. I find that I avoid them because I make them bigger than what they are, rather than seeing that it is not a hard task. Example: Worried about getting up to London and not being up there on time.
So I packed my bag the night before, saw a cash machine on route yesterday as took my son to Wimbledon park, and withdrew some cash and checked the trains the night before and then in the morning, set an alarm and just prepared myself.
Separate errands into sections, and think about how you will feel once the task is done and what it will lead to. I know when I complete tasks I feel a buzzed and that the preparation is the the key.
So don’t avoid get them done, do them but then reward yourself, very important and then go onto the things you want to do and do one together. Example when I have written a blog, I reward myself with watching a video, which is what I want to do, because I love writing blogs, but often will be my own worst critic and editing it can be a process, but I feel really good afterwards and so will then watch a bit of TV, what I want to do. If someone could in help me with editing I would be truly thankful.
It’s all about balance and not getting left behind, as this can be a factor, the time you have.
So break things down, prep and break each task down so its not such a burden to get the errands we plan done and make it enjoyable, example when I write I may listen to a podcast or music, with a cup of tea or coffee, have the window open and wear a favourites T-Shirt, anything that helps boost your enthusiasm to get errands completed so you and focus on the want items.
It is all about living life and making the most of it, why we have it.
So I went to bed feeling tired, well I wouldn’t go to bed wide awake, but as soon as my head hit the pillow my mind became active and so got up. I began to watch a documentary as I love to do at the weekend and if you wanted to know what, it is an Celine Dion Documentary when she goes back to perform in Las Vegas after she not long gave birth to twins.
I then get the urge to write this blog, and realised in the online world that it is hard to take a night off.
Being a writer it is often all I want to do and this after writing my previous blog “The Summer Project 2022” When you just don’t feel like it and suddenly feel the urge to write once again and so I have to get up and do it. I knew if I didn’t I’d be laying bed thinking about it and so admitted defeat, and now as I write this blog now, it is Sunday and 6am in the morning.
I had a relaxing day yesterday thought. I got to have a lie in thanks to my Step dad and watched some TV with my son, and then my mum took him out on his scooter and then when he left to be with his dad, wrote my other blog, filmed a video and then whilst doing a bit of Admin listened to some good music, my love at the moment is Jessie Ware.
Being the UK summer holidays it can be tiring and so not sure how much I will do during this period so when I get a window where I can write I will take the opportunity.
It is good to have a break, I have had burn out too many times and so I take it easy but never forget my passion and when I get the urge I will take it and reminds me why I love writing so much. I love connecting with people through it. I love being part of the online world and so I have to keep it going.
It is Saturday and know that my next Newsletter needs changing, and I don’t feel like it. I love creating them it’s just I have a free Saturday Afternoon and Evening, and had set out in my head my plan to do a bit of writing and been planning but actually feel slumped.
I have Saturday’s as my night off and this morning and early afternoon spent time with my son, and had a gap whilst my mum took him out this morning on his scooter, but now I feel like I could just go to bed.
It is good to take breaks and so going to make this my only thing I am going to do today, in terms for writing and then going to begin my night off and make this it for the rest of the day.
When I don’t have a break I feel so unenergized the next day and so set a day where you have free choice and I am going to watch a concert, a film or documentary. I am going to take a shower and have a alcoholic drink with my dinner. Set a day just for yourself. Have a different meal that is different to what you would have during the week and visit different friends that you don’t see often and with the hot weather it is good to have a night out in town. This is one thing I miss, and going to build confidence to have a date with myself.
So let’s just enjoy our weekend and there will be more blogs coming and thank you for your feedback so far.
In this blog I am talking about Managing Anxieties during the summer. These are about what we should wear, not feeling confident in wearing a bikini, travelling, boundaries, Summer time habits and having the summer blues.
It has taken a long time to get into the mindset where I am happy with myself and not putting myself down and would like to wear a bikini again, but I am going to shop around to find one that is suitable for me, and that is it. It is what you feel comfortable with, and I feel there is a stigma about being comfortable. This is because I have spoken about it too and that is getting out of your comfort zone, which can help, but it is balance. What will make you give a sense of “Yes I can do that” and “Yes I am worth this life”.
It is what makes you buzz about yourself, and I love my sense of style, and that is the first time I have ever said that, but it is true. I do feel comfortable in my own skin. What has made me finally feel like that? Making changes, and I don’t give myself a hard time over the fact that I don’t wear make up everyday and it has made a difference to my skin. I do get days where I want to and I will, but not all of the time. I look myself in the mirror, which is getting out of my comfort zone, because I avoided mirrors at one point, but now I do and I ain’t that bad.
I will divide this blog otherwise it will be too long. Having summer anxieties can effect us from enjoying the summer and then feel disappointed once its gone and think “Well I will make changes next year” but what if the next year doesn’t come? It for me has been a waste, in doing this. I obsessed about not being suntanned and tried tanning lotion, but would make me look patchy and so would then give myself a hard time over that. I now like my skin, because it is mine and now I will again look after my skin on my body, buy showering, using a scrub, treating myself to some nice showering gels and creams, and just giving myself some self love.
I know this may make you cringe but it honestly has made a difference. What one thing will make a difference to you? What items in my life currently makes me feel good, and what doesn’t? If it doesn’t make you feel good, get rid for an item that does. I have nothing against those who use tanning lotions if they make you feel good, they just didn’t work for me and it can cause aging sitting out in the sun all of the time so I do in moderation.
I hope these blogs and my videos help you and will be writing more as we continue working on ourselves, “The Summer Project 2022”.
I do write life coaching books on my amazon under the names Carrie Holmes and Carrie Challoner.
Living in England you never know when the sun will be out and often Weather Men and Women have got it wrong, but you can still live and often is an excuse to stay in and relax on the sofa watching the TV, but then you get bored.
This is me, so I don’t allow the weather to stop me from living, but have a plan B. Rather than going for a walk, do an indoor workout with friends or just wear rainy day clothes and still go but choose a different route if there are waterlogged places, but buy a pair of wellies or boots you don’t care about as much but wear for when it is raining and let your kids splash in the puddles it is good for their energy rather than restricting these activities.
I am a typical English gal in that I as soon as it is sunny and hot I will put on my shorts stored away, and always bring out jacket just in case. I would go running and with sleet rain I would still go for a run, I just make sure I have water proof items, like a jacket and in the winter layer but allow my body heat as I run to keep me warm.
I will do my writing indoors but be near a window so I can still look out and watch the world go by. It can be so relaxing watching the birds and wildlife whilst I work on my blogs and books.
I still will grab a coffee even though I am cutting down the amount I spend on takeaway coffee and use the items I have indoors, and it has made a difference, but often will have one towards reaching a goal or if I have had a good productive day. I will sit in a coffee shop with a notebook and not be on my laptop all the time, or catch up on emails on my phone.
When I am with my son I will make sure all my devices are away even staying in and will play card games, watch a bit of TV together and if it is possible take him to a place that has an indoor softplay area. We have seen some shows on our local Polka Theatre and take kids to the theatre. I loved doing this as a kid and would like to be more often being an adult.
Never restrict yourself and another way of Getting the most of your life.