Did you ever do the puzzle where you had to connect the dots that would form a picture? Well you can do that with life.
I have filmed my first video for this years Life Coaching Programme and so please check it out: https://youtu.be/bcHG7Dx_3ck?si=W4nzQka-oHxQ_yLr That is about Habits and with changing your habits it can help to join things together. Once that starts you will see changes in your life. In the printable I created check this blog which had the link to my printable I have created for this programme The Beginning of My Summer Project 2025 I am a Radio DJ/Presenter and connected another dot to having the life I want.
In my free printable I do each week, my cheat sheet I talk creating a Map Do Ten Things it helps me with writing my books. So the first ones I did were parenting books and wrote and published my first novel, A Lonely Walk to Happiness and now creating a series, and drawing out a map of ok so first book this year is to republish book 1 of the series, then continue to work on another book which is a stand alone and then work book 2 of my series.
Create a chart to see your progress or journal.
With WordPress it shows you how engaged your readers are and how much traffic you are getting.
With that it helps to see what blogs they are particularly interested in and why I continued with this programme because of the positive response to them.
So spend time mapping out what you want to work on and with that set goals, develop new positive habits. Example: I know when I brush my teeth how better I feel and there was a time I would miss days but lead me to not feeling good and having bad dreams about it. I like to be active and do a bit of walking each day, even if it is for 10 minutes and this leads me having better energy to write which I enjoy and clears the brain and when I don’t feel clogged up, feel good.
Concentrate on one area at a time, brainstorming is affective too and researching. I read books on writing, watch youtube videos of other self published authors and watching other peoples routine. Add Mind mapping to your routine as I do this a lot as I see my blogs grow and the writing of my books.
I hope you find these blogs helpful and if you want to be notified when I post then please subscribe and my Educational Youtube channel and then you will not miss a blog or a video.
It is now the 14th January 2025. I have already started to do Good Practices like reading every day and training myself on my various interests. I am building my knowledge to extend my online platforms and social media posts. I hope these efforts will boost my online content. They will help me get the most out of the online tools available.
Studying once a week can be a good practice. It is true, yes, “We Learn Everyday.” I like to spend time learning from self-published authors and finance. I also enjoy learning about good books to read, beauty, fashion, skincare, and organization.
I build my fitness subconsciously by walking and using dumbbells. Also housework. This morning, I put some clothes away in my closet and tidied the breakfast ware. I went through my notion planner. I am finding different ways to work towards the life I want. Have more experiences that help me to feel good and ready for each day, month, and year.
I have Chosen my word for the year. This has really helped encourage me to take on new challenges. Working on radio is challenging. It is very technical, and you need to have good attention to detail and I am loving it. I am glad I applied and did not allow my inner critic to talk me out of it.
Each day I will journal. This really helps clear my thoughts, even if I write just one or two sentences. It helps me to have a better mindset. Writing it down puts my thoughts, whether good or bad, into perspective.
Cleansing and looking after my skin and body. I need to control what I because it can affect my mood. In winter, I don’t feel like eating fruit, but I eat plenty of vegetables. I’m starting to take my supplements again, which helps with my immune system. It also supports me during that time of the month by affecting my thoughts and feelings.
Having Good Practices can help with getting through the colder days. They can also aid us financially when you can’t afford electric or gas. This strategy makes you focus on survival. I have had financial struggles because finding work has been tough. I was made redundant. Then, there was Lockdown, which had a huge impact on everyone. I was working in Childcare. The nursery where I was a Bank Staff member closed. Because of this, I was furloughed. Then my husband changed his job, which was fine. He must make sure he has a stable living. Still, the agreement I had with the Nursery was that I worked up to 6pm. I couldn’t do this, and I was mentally struggling. Now that I have financial stability, I check my bank account every day. I control what comes in and out and paid off my debt. These actions have helped me get back on the ladder of building my life. I am doing voluntary work now for Epsom Hospital Radio as mentioned. I would like to do more and build up my income.
I hope these blogs helps you to succeed. That means building the relationship you have with yourself. Follow your hearts and dreams by staying in some days. We joined my son and I, in doing a Parkrun. It was a good way to meet people. I received financial advice and support. This was during my time in a Mental Health Hospital. I had terrible anxiety and didn’t want to go out and wanted to hide away. I got back on my feet, and so can you. Plan and make changes to your life by doing Good Practices. So lets support each other as we all succeed.
We all have pressures in our lives or we have the same battles and arguments that have ended into saying hurtful things, lashing out, leading to the same feelings of hatred and bitterness. If it’s going to cause you unhappiness and then have your say, keeping it Civil and then hear there’s and leave it as a difference of opinion and move on. Often it isn’t actually a personal attack it can be that they have noone else to talk to about it and anger is often meaning that they are scared, not actually that they are confident and strong.
I have been jealous of friends and family to the point I’d feel low about myself and that I am never going to be good enough, but that has not been the case and so I had to do a lot of work on that and watched a Mel Robbins video about being Envious and Jealousy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RS_Lu5IIFBI
She says that we feel this way because we feel that the person your jealous of has robbed you in having success in your life to have the same dreams come true and to turn it around and yes I would feel like “What is wrong with me?” and “I am never going to get that dream because they’ve taken it”.
It can make you feel resentful and looking at the way they talk, walk and gain success in their life, which leads us thinking we belong in the audience but not the stage. If it is making you not eat, sleep or go out, then it is time to look at yourself and why they are where they are, because they’re not bothered. Your bothered but you needn’t be because they not losing sleep over you, so use it to make you determined and find your spotlight by giving yourself time to focus on you and can often mean that there is a different stage for you and not feeling that you have lost out. Everyone in this world deserves to be happy so work on letting your negative feelings go to be happy and proud of your life no matter what some else has been doing to have a success career and that your never going to compete. I use others success to make me hungry of succeeding accomplishing my goals to have a life I dream of and that meant stepping back and working on my Mental Health and bring up my son and help him with his development and things he’d like to do.
I am all about working together and encouraging others to be happy with their lives. Be the person you want to be, as long as there is no bad intentions but that is good and not feel that we are never going to change and that we will miss out because of someone else’s success. So let it go.
The idea of this blog, was this morning when I woke up around 4am and for the first time since I begun getting up between 4:30am to 5am, wondering about going back to bed, but I find when I sleep on I feel more tired.
I am like this new habit, of waking up early, check out my blog I’ve become an early bird But that little voice was like “Are you sure?” and responded in my head “Yes”.
Well I have had psychosis and so hearing voices isn’t new, but no its that critic that comes from the brain, that everyone has, and tests you and annoys you. There are people who can block this out, because we look at our beds, as if we may not return, but it has really changed my habits, and making progress of building a life I love and enjoy each day, no matter what the day brings.
As a kid I was a terrible sleeper, but due to my body clock, I would still wake up early and my idea of lying in, didn’t happen. I got to the point where I would worry about not getting a good nights sleep and it had bad affects and I understand now why many successful people go to bed at the same time every night and wake up, at the same time.
I am sleeping so well and my son now is started to sleep in. This may change, as having children, they can be unpredictable, since 2 months old (now he is 10) wakes up early, but this week he has slept on. This morning he woke up around 6:45am which is late for him.
There was a time I’d have lazy days, and staying in bed all day, not gotten dressed and I know people who still love doing that and that is okay, and part of me misses those times, so perhaps start having these days again, but at the moment like being active and getting up with a nice cup of tea getting some writing done. Not saying I wouldn’t do it again, but now and then, watching some movies with popcorn, homemade pizzas and a drink of choice. Or have a sort out wearing slacks. Catching up on cleaning tasks and still have a shower but put on some nice PJ’s and still feel like you have still kind of, made an effort.
A lady called Mel Robbins, is to do nothing and just rest. Jordan Page, talks about taking naps and there was a time when working at a Holiday Camp where I would nap in the day but when I did I would feel groggy and be confused with the time of the day, so I don’t nap. My brother can easily sit on the sofa and snooze like my husband, and in the mornings it would take me ages to wake and be lazy watching TV on the sofa and found it hard to kick start my day.
So being lazy can help with recharging batteries and it is good to just take a break from whatever you feel you need a break from and get back on the road and carry on once refreshened. Listen to the body. Our body are machines and it is important that we look after it. We are not here to be on the go all of the time, but take on experiences, where you can take a breath and feel the air coming into the body and out. We need to watch that TV series or read a book, or meditate. So I will still be lazy when I feel I need to do nothing and switch off as I do find that hard to do, and just live, be happy and take it step by step.
My life has not been pain sailing, like us all, there has been ups and downs and when my mum or dad told me off I would be like, it was the end of the world and that I am right and they’re wrong, and so unfair, and would envy my brother, because he is super confident, and girls running after him, whilst I sat on a bench at school by myself.
I have had to really work on my self. I could get jealous, bitter and self centered, like “How have they earned that?”, “Oh they are showing off and trying to be super popular”, or like when I was a primary school, a girl named Sherie, was so popular and all the boys fancied her, and everyone wanted her company and be friends with her. I felt ugly and envious, that I will never be her, like I wished to be.
My mental health took a turned for the worst, and battled with my feelings for a long time. There were times when I didn’t get out of bed, and would stay in, and now I have been discharged from the Mental Health hospital, so proud of myself that I got through my fight with my mental health and not allowing my inner critic to hold me back and stop feeling that I haven’t had a exciting life compared to others, and that the world is against me.
Here are some questions to ask,
Who do you want to be?
Do you feel unworthy and that you’ll never be as good as someone in your life?
Do you feel that noone understands you?
Writing a journal, can really help address your feelings and what is it that is really bothering you?
For me it was, well if I look like that, like Sherie, then I will be as popular and the kids would want to hang with me, but that wasn’t the case and started to form friends as I gradually went through school, but it took a long time, and would have fights and arguments and was bullied. In the end I was well respected at Primary school. It took the last year to experience that, but that I had come so far, and then wanted to start a fresh beginning, at secondary school.
The feelings didn’t disappear, and got stronger. I now look back it was once again that I wasn’t fitting in, and was told by a girl that I was boring, because I was a fan of a TV show The Bill, and would talk about it a lot, and took it, and glad for her honesty and yes it hurt my feelings, but then she wasn’t perfect and would get on people’s nerves, yet we did have fun together, so I let it go.
With those group of friends, they would be into wrestling and one of my friends did canoeing, and shared our love of music. They were the ones who got me into following a rugby team and when I felt like I couldn’t buy chips in McDonalds they got them for me, and introduced me to rock music and went to concerts together, and made friends at my dancing school, and my confidence began to increase.
I have been unkind, and blocked people, because I was feeling excluded and it really was affecting me, because felt it was a personal attack. Now though I glad that they have done well in their life and now in jobs that are high powered, and looking after themselves.
Our negative feelings can rub off on others. I have been with people who would constantly be complaining. I am lucky for having the people around me that keep the roof over my head and support me in looking after my son, and at the weekend I met up with friends who I met when I was working at a holiday camp, and felt so privileged to be in their company as we had a good catch up, and that we all, trying to build our lives and be happy. I can be awkward and shy still but when you meet people, and makes you feel that you’ve never been apart, the fear instantly goes, your inner critic gets pushed away making you feel that you are worthy and people love you, and stop putting your guard up, and not allow your fears get the better of you, but make you grow and be the person you wished to be, and telling people that you love them, can help you and them. There are a lot of people I love, because they have been a huge importance to my life, and been a great influence. I am kind, I will be on time, and I will make the effort.
When you have been through trauma, it can make you angry, and “Why me?”, “What have I done to deserve it?” and often its nothing, its life, it can be unpredictable. Noone knows what is around the corner for us, and so, talking about growing our happiness, ask yourself, do you want to be unhappy all through your life? I have had to rebuild, and make sense of situations, but often there isn’t an answer. I no longer want my inner critic stop me from going swimming and going for walks, from spending time with my son, and go for opportunities, that can open many doors for me. I no longer want to be counting calories, and worrying about my weight. If biscuits are going to make me feel guilty, then I am not going to eat them, if someone doesn’t say thank you when you open the door for them, because what’s the point, they don’t care and not allow me to have a bad day, but continue to be kind and not allow their ignorance to rub off.
So lets all work together in building and growing our lives, its never too late to be happy and grow your feelings, to feel better about yourself. I do write a blog where I talk about building confidence. Check it out via this link: https://buildingselfconfidencetud.blogspot.com/
So it is the end of another weekend and trying to get a Vlog ready to upload and its not happening, so gonna worry about it for another day.
The weekends are about spending time with my son and see other family which we did today, and played a new Dominoes game and a card game and was such good fun. I love my weekends and having that extra rest and go for a coffee out and just having that break ending the week and starting it, and as a kid I never always appreciated them, but we were always out when I was kid, seeing friends and family, and just different from the week,and they were such fun times and miss that.
I still get stuff done, by putting some laundry on, putting clothes away that are clean and not been put away, and use my Sunday evenings to plan for the week and plan my writing for the week and just setting myself up to have a good week and ready for any challenges that may occur, and always thinking about an alternative solutions if the trains aren’t operating properly and if there are delays. If appointments have been changed, and recharge my batteries so I can function well for the week ahead.
Saturday we went out. My son’s swimming lesson was cancelled and we were going to watch my brothers team play rugby, but got called off, so jumped on a couple of buses and went to Putney, and took my son into the park, walked along the river and had a really nice meal out, and such a nice weekend.
There were other people doing the same and forgetting their normal routine and just living life, socialising and chatting, and living.
So make the most of your weekend so it doesn’t feel you haven’t done anything and take the time off, and live. Spend the time meeting friends and seeing family, go for a walk and meet someone for a coffee or go out, making sure you stay safe, but live it and live for the moment. On my way home from seeing my brother and his wife, and kids I started to go through emails, and then I sat back and stopped and said to myself “Stop and sit and just enjoy the ride”, not looking on Instagram, emails or Youtube and just enjoy, and it felt so good, So have that time to take in what is around you, and give yourself that time to do what you want and let yourself be free of rushing around.
Just to let you know I did uploaded my week in a life on my main Youtube channel, so check it out: https://youtu.be/-7vRdXxHPuQ
I bet you have watched the X Factor or BGT, that many say when they do the auditions, that this is their last chance, but what if you had one chance? I wrote in my last blog about Dealing with Knockbacks and that to keep trying to do what you dream of doing, yet sometimes you do only get the one chance, for example: Being on a quiz show or game show, as it lets other people have a go, or winning the lottery.
I read a book by Paul McKenna some years back and he asked in this books, it was Building your confidence in seven days, and for me it would be to travel and explore with my son, and raise money for a charity and have a house built.
So what would you do if you only had one chance of achieving your dreams?
What steps would you follow?
I would clear my credit card debt, build up my savings,
Decide on the fundraising events I’d like to do and train for them and walk and run whenever possible again and continue as long as my legs allow me to do
Save enough to have the money to have a house built, by creating numerous income streams and have a bank account for building the house of my dreams.
Please leave details of what you would do in the comments below.
You have to make things happen for yourself, and it has taken me a long time to realise that and so I make the most of my days and weeks, and months now. I want to make sure I create good memories for my son, and it is up to me to do that and receives the best education, and learning about places and life skills such baking and cooking, reading, writing, how to wash their clothes and keep things nice and tidy. That has to come from me and his dad, and making sure that his needs are met and the same for us too being parents and be a role model.
If people see you achieving your dreams a lot of people will follow and be inspired, and life as it is, we never know if we are going to live or die, that really is out of our control, and so living each day to the fullest is how you can do the things you want, have happiness in your life. It is not about money, that is a necessity, but about how it makes you feel and the people around you.
I at the moment I have a stinking cold and when I feel like this I find it hard to stay positive because all I want to do is hide away and hibernate until it goes. Some people hate the word, because some say that “It’s not easy to stay positive all of the time”, and I do believe that this is true, because life takes over, and as much as I’d like to stay in bed all day, going on how I feel at the moment know I have responsibilities that need care. I don’t want to be grumpy when looking after my son, because it can really affect him, and so it is putting brave face on and getting on with whatever needs must. When it comes to positivity it is not all about smiling but being content and right now as I write this blog I am in my nightwear, and is making me feel a lot better.
Our bodies need fuel and so when you have a comfy dinner or a room that you can just chill can help with mood and so that is the good side of the positivity and why it is good, because it gets in touch that we need some love care and attention. We should be able to do that and look after our wellbeing. Having a hot bath or a hot drink can do wonders, so looking after yourself is for me positive but not the cringing kind, such as “Smile everyday, you’ve got this”. When I am feeling like death that is the last thing I want.
There are positive outcomes, whereby you’ve had a bad day so far, but when your spouse hands you a glass of wine can be just the ticket someone needs for a smile, but when they are beaming, “How was your day?” with a massive grin it can be like “I love you but honestly not what a I need, I will get my own glass of wine”.
When I try this with my son Henry, no glass of wine involved, in case you got confused there, being excited to see him after school and how his days been, he is like “No no, let me watch my tablet” and I try again, and which I get pushed away, until he wants to play rugby or football, and then I am like “No it’s okay” I say being full of cold, but then see he won’t give in until I get up off the sofa, and see that being super positive is not needed, but being present is, so we don’t all need to be positive but happy with the simplest of things. It is all about balance and finding what makes you feel like the weight of your shoulders and have someone to share responsibilities with, can help too.
Caring is sharing and so it depends on the time of day and what has happened each day that can be positive or negative. Everyday is new and so if you feel like its time for an early night that will help you feel better, then do it. Sometimes rather then being sprung on my a cheerful maniac a cup of tea and a packet of biscuits is all one needs to be positive, so tell me what you think do you think is Positivity good or bad? You can leave a comment below.
Hello and Welcome! Thank you again for your feedback and that you are liking my blogs I have written to do my 30 day challenge. Post a blog a day for 30 days and it is day 28 and talking about Using Summer to make positive changes to your life.
Have a reason for each part of the day. So for me at the moment is getting up early morning to look and spend time with my son during the Summer Holidays. and afternoon going out with him and then in the evening having a good meal and then catching up in the evening to work on my blogs and do some writing and checking job vacancies as I am looking for some work in MentalHealth.
Use the weather to inspire you to if you can working outside. It is good to have some sun and working. It for me helps split up the day and is a change than being stuck in the room and I still longng for a pub lunch at some point and I find exploring London, my home town, inspiring and can’t wait to go to the theatre again.
Change the routine you have each season including summer. Use it do some gardening for example even if not done during the colder months and it is starting to grow the “Grow your own vegetables and fruit and vegetables” it saves you money, and having a drink in the garden rather than in the sitting room all of the time, whilst watching your flower beds bloom and home grown food grow.
Finally have friends and family round that you have not seen for ages again and not been able to contact via Zoom or facetime. It is gonna be a blessing to some people that they can see their love ones again and so why not have a gathering. It is good to have a catch up with those who you love
So, it is as easy as that and add some fun into your life and #BeKind and #BeSafe
So are you stuck on how to move on from your life due to a set back?
Being human we often buckle under pressure and yeah me too, so if you need to take a break you are still being unstoppable because taking breaks is part of our growth. It also means that you have done enough to have time off and that was me today. I spent a whole morning and yesterday looking after my son and had a good old fashion muck about and it did mean getting up early still but advantage I got to watch some TV as I don’t often get the chance.
Self care and doing other tasks like looking for jobs in mental health, go through emails and check feedback on my blogs, as it is good to see your kindness in you liking my blogs, time and to see you my audience reactions to my posts. It means the world to me and makes me unstoppable..
To get yourself on track take a step back and go through how you are feeling and what is making you stop and feel unsure. What is causing you to feel stuck? and go through what you have done each day to see what has triggered you to step back.
Knowing the triggers you will learn to have more resillance to them and will help you overcome them. Example if you want to do a run like never before but you struggle getting out of the door to start, something is causing a fear and it could be not being able to go to far.Break iot down. I would train one day a week and then I created into something to enjoy and I would go for a run every Sunday and so don’t massive goals list and try out some motivation videos to help.
Change the pattern of how you see running. Perhaps it is the rain, moving to a new area that you worry you may get lost. Preplan the route and just to one road at the time or one lap around a local park. Winter have two layers as you will warm up as you run and doing some exercisses before hand can boost your energy in going for a run.
Think about building blocks and monitor yourself and when in a Mentalhealth hospital they would do a reflection each Friday to go over how we have each of us being a patient been, and what could the staff do to make us feel better. Reflecting is a great way to stay on track because often we see it differently if we take a look back.
Take time in going over the year you have had so far and what do youn avoid a lot. For me it is I know I am going to need a dentist appoinment and a new eye test but I see these as a burden so I am going to see if I can set a date to get these done.
Avoidance can often put more pressure on your shoulders. So perhaps I can, with the above appointments delegate this in someway. If someone else books it then I am more likely to go.
Create new patterns in your life so you can be unstoppable.