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Everyone can build a castle

~ Creating goals, habits and being empowered aiming for success

Everyone can build a castle

Tag Archives: fight back

What is this all about? Updating posts relevant to my current way of living

24 Wednesday Mar 2021

Posted by Carries Blog Network in Personal Development

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Tags

Body Image, Build, Building confidence, Dilemmas, Fear, fight back, goals, Low Self Esteem, Mental Health, pressure, Self Conscious, Self Doubt, self help, Self Loath, Stepping back, visualisation

So this week I am updating many of my passed blog posts to make them current and relative to my current way of living. I have never been more structured in my life and Everyone Can Build A Castle was about, how to develop your life so you too can have a castle that is full of opportunities and possibilities and it is symbolism of how everyone can have a happier fulfilled life, it’s all about making changes that will last not just for the new year, but forever.

Sheffield's long-lost castle reveals the city's deep roots in the Middle  Ages - Archive - News archive - The University of Sheffield

I am a Jet Setter and a doer and this in many articles and other blogs I have read, is often seen as a bad thing, but is it?

No! I like the fact that I like to do a lot of things, and jump in with both feet, as it is what has helped me fight through the bad times of my life, and keep going, even though, there are those who tried to stop me, but I never allowed it to defeat me and battled my way through mental torment aswell as physical.

You know my Grandad had about 6 life threatening attacks on him? Yes in the second world war, when he was fighting out in Burma. He missed being killed a lot during that time, and we all joked that he is like a Human Cat and had 9 lives, as honestly being almost shot in the head, but the bullet went through his hat to the person behind him is like someone was looking after him, and that he was being saved for a purpose. I do believe in God and hearing those stories made me see that even after such troubling time, you can still grow peacefully and when he told me of those stories, I was like “Bloody hell how are you still standing?”, but yes, and he then went onto having a successful career afterwards as a Bus Conductor and before then had his own Butchers shop, which got hit and never to be returned too.

Now he joked about that, because he did what wardons told him not to do apparently, and that is leave the lights on as you will be a target and yes he forgot and yes it was a direct hit. But would he have done that?  it was because there were some stores like his being broken into, and so he wanted to treat those kids a lesson and would tell them, when he found out which ones they were, and yes it was often a young lad stealing, but not too especially in the war and they would make out it was the owner of the stores who had left the lights on, but no it was them, and if you’re gonna do that, expect to get hit, and if you steal and are in my store at the time of when it gets blown up, so will you.

My Grandad Charlie Skinner, was known in the war as “The Man with 9 lives”. So it goes to show that even going through a war, you can still create a new life too and that is what this blog is all about. Building your life and becoming a success.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie L.M X

How to cope when there are people who are against you

15 Sunday Nov 2020

Posted by Carries Blog Network in empowerment, Everyday living, having bad days, how to deal with those that drag you down, People, Personal Development

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Tags

be with people who love you, Bullying, bullying at home, everyone can build a castle, fight back, how to cope when there are people who are against you, looking after your wellbeing, looking after yourself, negative people, uncomfortable atmosphere, unworthy

Two People Screaming At Each Other High Resolution Stock Photography and  Images - Alamy

So this year has been a rollercoaster and that is no exaggeration, it is sadly true, and I have opened to the fact that there are those who were born to be evil, and having nothing nice to say about anyone, apart from themselves.

I am gonna give you some tips if you too have experience a uncomfortable atmosphere and how to cope with it. Many say walk away, but that isn’t always an option, but these are;

  • Don’t entertain them. If they try to make you feel intimidated or they are threatening you, then don’t entertain them. Let them get on with it, and if they get in your face, then react by saying “I know what you are doing I am not scared so go away”.
  • Focus on those who do love you. It can be like being in a horrible bubble you can’t get out of, and so if there are others who do show you love and consideration then focus on them, as they are the sort of people that have always got your back.
  • Try and see if you can speak to someone outside of your bubble. Having home help, real kind, as there are some fake ones out there, can really make a difference, as often it can be difficult to know who you can turn too, and if you are a small child or a teenager reading this, speak to Childline who can help or have a chat with your GP to see if they can refer you to someone like a therapist or counsellor.
  • Let them see that you don’t really have a problem with them, it is often one rule for one and another rule for everybody else, and by showing them that as much as they dislike you or have a problem with you, you don’t really have one with them, which can often be the case.
  • Fight back, by showing them that no matter how much they try to demolish you, your going to carry on regardless. Many people who are not nice, don’t like to see anyone be happy and successful, but never allow it to stop you. Its your life, your rules not theirs.
  • Don’t react like they expect you too. Being someone who was bullied from an early age, learned how to react to the opposite to how people like them would expect, and not being angry back is one of them, and keeping a steady voice can help and that you aren’t going to hit them, like a lot of not nice people do, unless they go to far then a clout never hurt anyone to those who are just plain evil.
  • Take yourself away for a bit. I don’t mean move away completely as that is not always an option, but for a few hours or so, so you can spend time with those who do love you and where it is not uncomfortable, as a bad atmosphere can be like a massive weight on your shoulders.

We often can’t choose who we want to be with all of the the time, but you can as these tips above show still be happy without them, and live a happy life still.

I hope this blog does help and just a quick note, I am raising money for a charity called Tommy’s this year as we draw near to Christmas, and so if you wish to donate, here is the link below:

https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/theparentingadventuresprematurebirths

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

The Fear Of Being Bullied again

18 Wednesday Feb 2015

Posted by Carries Blog Network in having bad days

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Tags

Bullying, Change of Behaviour, everyonecanbuildacastle.wordpress.com, Fear, Feeling Intimidated, fight back, Mental Health, Spotting the signs of a bully

Once you have been bullied you always have that fear of it happening again. Since being a victim of bullying myself I have learned how to spot the signs of a bully by their body language, how they progressively change; do they let the whole world know when you have done something they have not been happy with? Or told everyone around them when your backs been turned and purposely not done something and blamed you for the mistake or something they were supposed to do but didn’t?

They may put on a front at first and be all nice to you, but as soon as you start settling in at school or work, the behaviour and character starts to waiver and change. They may start by nit picking on things, by commenting on your personal image, they may start to act different in front of certain people when they are talking to you; do they pull faces as they are speaking you?

It doesn’t matter whatever level the person is, weather it is a school pupil, another colleague or if you feel a teacher or a manager is coming across as aggressive, confrontational as if they want to intimidate you then this can be the beginnings of a bully’s behaviour. If you come across anyone starting to make you feel isolated, spreading rumours or making you feel uncomfortable then you have the right to speak out and take action.

Let the bullies know you are not going to stand for the way they are being towards you, or rise to their level of abuse or wrong behaviour. You do not have to sit their in silence and you do have the right to tell them, that they are being wrong and you wish to do a good job but their behaviour towards you is effecting you from doing a good job, and if it continues you will take action to stop it from happening.

Here is a blog I am subscribed to which also talks about bullying, from someone who has also been targeted by bullies.

https://bullyinglte.wordpress.com/author/aeisenbe/

It also has tips on how to handle someone who is bullying you.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

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