Yes Yes Yes! NO this is not copying when Harry met Sally, if you remember that film, I have set my goals for the summer, ready for the next season and to grow. Setting goals helps me to accomplish the things I want to do, and help me get through challenges, like for example I want to do fundraising events again but worry that I am not fit enough and have had injuries in building my walking and running again.
Running and walking on uneven pavements can contribute to that so it important I continue to walk as much as possible and get my body used to it again. There will always be hurdles, and so use this when it comes to achieving your goals, not to exhaust yourself but to stir you on to complete them.
I separate my goals into three categories, Home, Work and Play.
So in home is anything like my finances and Henry, my son like getting ready to prepare for his new school,, work is like my blogs and youtube for example and hopefully be outside work soon, and play is going out to dinner, trips and playing with son having lots of fun.
Here a printable I made to help you begin your Summer Goals:
The summer me is getting outdoors and exploring and do things that you can’t do in the Autumn and Winter, like swimming outdoors and have a meal in the garden. Well I suppose you could do these things in the Autumn and Winter, but would need blankets and coats, but for the summer you don’t and just having a lunch outside of a restaurant can be uplifting and, so they don’t have to be serious goals but ones that you can almost feel the enjoyment and motivation already, just by jotting them down.
You can keep; track of my blogs but following me and if you’d like to share you goals the please do. You can comment below..
I bet you have watched the X Factor or BGT, that many say when they do the auditions, that this is their last chance, but what if you had one chance? I wrote in my last blog about Dealing with Knockbacks and that to keep trying to do what you dream of doing, yet sometimes you do only get the one chance, for example: Being on a quiz show or game show, as it lets other people have a go, or winning the lottery.
I read a book by Paul McKenna some years back and he asked in this books, it was Building your confidence in seven days, and for me it would be to travel and explore with my son, and raise money for a charity and have a house built.
So what would you do if you only had one chance of achieving your dreams?
What steps would you follow?
I would clear my credit card debt, build up my savings,
Decide on the fundraising events I’d like to do and train for them and walk and run whenever possible again and continue as long as my legs allow me to do
Save enough to have the money to have a house built, by creating numerous income streams and have a bank account for building the house of my dreams.
Please leave details of what you would do in the comments below.
You have to make things happen for yourself, and it has taken me a long time to realise that and so I make the most of my days and weeks, and months now. I want to make sure I create good memories for my son, and it is up to me to do that and receives the best education, and learning about places and life skills such baking and cooking, reading, writing, how to wash their clothes and keep things nice and tidy. That has to come from me and his dad, and making sure that his needs are met and the same for us too being parents and be a role model.
If people see you achieving your dreams a lot of people will follow and be inspired, and life as it is, we never know if we are going to live or die, that really is out of our control, and so living each day to the fullest is how you can do the things you want, have happiness in your life. It is not about money, that is a necessity, but about how it makes you feel and the people around you.
Ok so you went for a job interview, got ready and put on some make up, did your hair and dressed smart and prepped for it, only to hear that once again you haven’t been unsuccessful. Often we can feel that we have wasted our time, but your not able to see who else applied for that job and what skills they had that you didn’t.
Often it could be that the company who you applied for, may have already had someone in mind and so you didn’t stand a chance anyway, even if you had worn your best suit or dress. I felt like that when I applied for a position to work with the email and chat team at a call centre I was working for. I had been there for a while and felt that it would be a perfect fit, but no someone else got it, who had been there less, and I felt a bit like, “Thanks for being loyal” being that I had been there four years and not had a day off sick, never been late and did a good job because they’d tell me, and so would the customers I would help. I was doing technical support.
Also I was the first person to work on the chat system they created, and I changed departments because I was finding it hard doing technical support for certain products that I didn’t understand and wanted a change, and so it was agreed that I could change, but then the deal was that I would work on the chat system which they wanted to test for a new product and see how effective it was, and whilst on chat would do emails to help out the email team, and it wasn’t just me others had joined me and it would be rotated so others worked on the chat system, did emails, whilst I help customers on the phones. I then was called into the office on one shift and offered the chance to move to the email team, along with working on the online chat service, and so, never give up. Just because you didn’t get the job this time, round doesn’t mean you won’t, you just have to keep trying and show them what you are capable of and worked my hard and was eventually awarded by the job I was doing.
Determination for me is everything and I have had a lot of knock backs, and I did when I was looking for work to work at a Holiday camp. I gave myself two years and it was the second year I was successful. Often people want to see how keen you are, and you see singers on the voice, who have already had record deals, and had to start their career from scratch again. Like Wendy Moten, who won the Voice on the USA version and was shocked because she did do some brilliant records, her famous one “Coming out of the rain”, and so knocks backs are okay, and learn from them to help continue building the life you want, and the job you want.
When it comes to relationships. I have been dumped by boyfriends, not having that many, and yes at first I’d be upset but then soon got over it, and if they aren’t meant to be so be it, but never fear, I did get married and had a son so now looking back, glad I was dumped because I would never have met my husband or had my son.
Life is full of hurdles Obstacles (jumping hurdles) and never should stop you for following your dreams and achieving your goals. I am never gong to allow anyone stop me from living my life and the same should be for you. You deserve a life full fun and happiness. So allow the knock backs in your life to help you not destroy you.
Yes, finding things that have a huge impact on you. This can be that you want more love from people because you feel a lone at the moment, so it is time to go out and find like minded people and this could be going to church or just on a date with yourself, keeping safe of course, but listening to @RealTalkKim she says that you aren’t likely to meet anybody if you are with a group of girls, and I met my husband working at a Holiday camp and it for once felt comfortable and didn’t feel nervous at all, and you can meet people in many different places like that. I was quite late in my life in the dating game
If you want more friends in your life then go out with your existing friends and rather than saying no to meeting up, say yes, and set a date of when you can and go out. I have met a lot of people through other friends. Example I made friendships through a friend when going to watch a Rugby League team and met others along the way, when I kept going, and was a fun and with a fantastic group of people.
You may want more structure in your life and for me I want to be a minimalist and not be surrounded by stuff and not be bogged down, so slowly I am making that happen by having a sort out each day and looking at pictures on Pinterest of how I would like my work station to look like, and still have all I need around me, its just overcrowded and so want to have less space to do more.
Then there are physical changes. I have lost weight and a lot of my clothes are now too big, so been going through my clothes and shoes and items that no longer make me happy in wearing and put them in recyclable bin where my son goes swimming at the weekend, and also invest more in looking after my skin.
I have been really enjoying my weekend walks with my son in the mornings in the day time, and makes me feel that my physical health as got a lot better and no longer feeling fatigued all day and do take Iron tablets to help with that and feels good to have my energy back.
It is simple things like that, that can really matter to you, and either gives you joy, or not. Fitting things in your life that makes you excited rather then dread, help you grow and find the pieces to your jigsaw that brings you endless amounts of love and compassion.
I wanted to write this because to have life full of happiness, you got to make changes that will help you grow into the person you want to be and the life you want to live. Check out my blogspot blog about Getting all done, as this is linked to this blog post.
You have to create a plan, one that gives you excitement as soon as you start to write it down, and build a mind map. I use this technique a lot, along with brainstorming. Create a vision board. I use Pinterest like many, but you can do this on a white board, or on a piece of paper even. It’s about building and improving how you feel about yourself, and the life you have.
Perhaps you need to change your job, because you are bored or feel overworked and resenting it each day. Boy have I been there. Researching though it is believed that 74% of people are very satisfied with working in the UK, according to google. It all depends what the employer offers you in return to the work you do, for their company. Travel can be an issue and pay.
Whatever area in your life you are not happy about, it is time to make a change.
Set yourself a challenge or challenges. The one area I have been trying to sort out is my finances and rebuilding a positive relationship with it. So I have been doing a weekly check on my money and write down everyday of any money spent and having no spend days, and go through what I have paid out at the end of the week and what has gone in.
I have been doing a lot more walking again to cut down on my travel costs, on a daily and weekly basis and because I want to take part in Charitable and fundraising walks again. I want to build more income to save, and invest in having a big holiday again. I am going through where I can save money wherever possible. Example: not buying coffees from the coffee shop, and use my instant coffee, that takes me ages to use up, and not buying snacks all of the time.
I did no spend January challenge this year and will do again, because I have been able to put money into my savings again, and cut down on where my money goes.
By setting challenges, it helps to make quick changes, and complete unfinished task.
Set yourself an Itinerary. I did this whilst sitting in the garden and what are my main goals for 2023 and 2024. I find it hard to concentrate on one thing at a time, and so doing things like this helps me stay focused, of what I really want to complete and accomplished by the end of these two years. I suppose it is a bit like doing forecast.
Check out this free printable, to see what I mean:
I was watching an event that Tony Robbins was hosting on Youtube last night and so glad I manage to catch it as it was really good to map out a plan of building areas in my life I not happy with. I will link here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kPchhI_fPQk
He talked about do a like a wheel of life to measure where you life is at, here’s an example:
With Tony’s he separated them into seven different segments, Physical/body, Emotions and meaning, Relationships/conspire, Time, career and mission and finances. and contribution and spirituality. Then mark between 0 being nothing, you are not in a relationship to 10, you are in a relationship and are completely happy with it.
So, next tips, take part or join in live events. They are such an insight into how to manage your life and getting a lot out of it. Rather sitting doing nothing, hoping that someone will come an rescue you. You have to do it and last nights was completely free.
You want to get life together then it is time to do it.
Yes I have heard this before, but honestly it does make a difference and go through what is top priority. I will do a list in my diary of what will be happening each day like Friday I bring my son to Wimbledon and a list of on OneNote of what I want to get done in the day. I then go through it on the day and go through what I need to do first and have something in your life that helps to kick start your day on a good note. I now tidy and make my bed, get dressed and then make a cup of tea, breakfast and then when it is warm weather open up my bedroom window and do something different, like I woke up super early which I don’t always do and having that time just putting clothes away that is out and at the moment I gradually changing my desk where my laptop is and it just helps give me kick start. I often return to bed which many may say no, but for me if I need extra rest and get the chance to then I will.
2. Use travel time to wind down and do the things you enjoy.
So I use travel time as I travel from Wimbledon to Epsom daily and back, will listen to music, listen to a podcast or listen to an audiobook. It helps me to remove any fears I have when riding on a bus like what if it crashes and other stresses and is my time to just sit down and reflect on things.
3. Still sleep when your kids still sleeps some nights
I will like tonight as I continue to write this blog is listen to a live video, but will often go to bed at the same time as my son, because he wakes up so early, and he doesn’t got to bed early as such and stays up like tonight around 9pm but he still awake but he will still will wake up early and so I need to make sure I get a good number of hours sleep to function for the next day.
4. Do a daily walk solo, with family or with friends
Each weekend my son and I will go for a walk or if he uses his scooter I will often run but I have a bit of injury so going to walk, but whatever we will still get outdoors and enjoy spending that time together.
5. Journal and reflect on each day or weekly or whenever you feel stressed and not feeling so good.
I like to keep tabs on my feelings and what I can do to help them and make sense of them. It may be that you feel stuck and you are bored with life. Journaling can help with that and what action can you take that will solve this issue, perhaps you need a different job, or you are not eating well. That is a battle for me at the moment and trying to control my eating by keeping tabs of what I am consuming because I crave a biscuit rather than a piece of fruit so next week I am going to make a plan to sort this out. I use my blogs to journal too, to show that yes I am happy but feel that my eating habits can contribute towards my feelings so need to take control and sort this out.
What I have began is do a meal plan, the thing is I often will change my mind though and not fancy what I initially wanted but will plan and what I don’t eat on that day, as long as it is in date I will eat it another day when I do fancy it. Evening meals and breakfasts are fine I just get super hungry in the afternoon and often binge eat, which I know is no good for me.
6. Spend time reading.
I love a good book and read in the evening and I look forward to it. I like a genre of books from Fiction to non-fiction and going to start reading my book in the park too. I love doing this in the summer.
I also love to read a magazine and recently got back into this. I often will change how I spend my time and I love sitting in the sun reading a mag, I find it so relaxing.
I have always lived in a world of my own and felt different compared to others. Many thought me to be strange because I could daydream all day long and take my mind away when listening to music for hours.
Reality was not my bestfriend and wished often to be somewhere else and be different to the person I was and would be down because I wasn’t naturally beautiful, I wasn’t popular and held myself back from making friends as I found it hard.
Overcoming those times I have grown a lot and it hasn’t been over night but a long process. The one thing that effected me was worry. I would say “I am a constant worrier” and “I am a stress head” and accepted that this was me, but I hated worry and stress they did me no good and wanted to be calm and collective.
Spending some time away helped, but suffered home sickness at first but then spoke to someone one evening as they could see that I was not sure if did the right thing moving to work at a Holiday camp. I know you may have heard this a lot, but is true, get out of your comfort zone. There were those who weren’t nice, others would be nice to you and then blank you, or move to another table as you sat down, but then there were some really nice people that I still stay in touch with.
Working at a holiday camp was how I met my husband and then moved back to London as was unsuccessful in working at other companies in the South Coast and began to miss London and wanted to move back to be near my friends there and family.
If something is no longer giving you joy, Kon Marie method, then it time to say goodbye and move on.
I do hang onto things, like I had a night dress with a hole in it, and kept hold of it because I had worn when pregnant, but it was worn. I now don’t have it anymore but I did find hard to throw it away.
Part of building a life of your own is to let go and bring in new items and materialistic things aren’t that important. If it going to put you in debt, is it worth it?
This leads me to, changing your environment if you are feeling overcrowded. Just filming at the moment week in a life video, (here is my newest video: https://youtu.be/zqywdAV9vb8 ) I feel my desk is overcrowded with notebooks, jewelry and skincare and so gonna look for ideas how to deal with this and going first of all sort my clothes out. I bought packing cubes for the clothes I have in my chest of draws. I will film this once I decide to do this.
Owning less is what I am going to begin and make more space. I need space in my life and not live in clutter.
I am living to build my life and make it better each day. The one thing that can effect my mood is music as some gives me good memories and others that helps to motivate me and feel good. There are songs that reminds me of sad times, but I use a lot of that to help write my books, depending on what the books are about. I tend to write biographical, like my The Parenting Adventures books, check them out on amazon, along with serious novels on real life issues and comedy.
I do have a lot of ideas on writing children’s books and I have created a playlist to help me write.
Then there are darts players who each have a song they walk on to and you can tell that the music to them is what makes them with their confidence and excitement by the supporters that are there at the matches to support their favourite places. The music helps with the build up and entertainment of the sport.
When I see videos on Instagram by The Rock, Dwayne Johnson, he is working out with music and you can tell that the music he plays has influenced him in building his body and staying in shape.
Music is powerful and when I did dancing the music played a key part in the dancing routines we would do and it had to be the right music to help with the enjoyment of the doing the different routines we would do, and with the disco part we often the children would make up new routines but it had to be the right song, for the dances to work, and help complete the creation of the dance.
When you watch American Wrestling each wrestler have their own song, and whenever there is a change of president in the United States they have singers on stage singing supporting them like when Barracker Balmer became president it was Beyoncé and sang At Last and always think about that when the song plays and it was the music that was created for World cup 1990 in Italy that made me fall in love with the football and so music can have a massive influence on our dreams.
If you have entered in a free Webinar online with Tony Robbins, I mean the free ones, well they play music as they encourage you to dance off your feelings to boost your energy before they start and during and really helps the mind, and so music can play a huge part in your body, mind and spirit, to help towards dreams and a great source of free medicine.
So choose music to motivate as it can tick all the boxes for therapy for me and would not live without it.
So we are now heading towards the end of May and so far I have seen progress in things in my life, like I have built up my Youtube channels, I have more follows and likes for my blog posts and that means the world to me. I feel things are taking shape in terms of managing my finances, staying on track with exercise and keeping track of my son school events and helping him with his learning, as I was finding it hard to stay on track in these areas, this is helping me to see what other areas of my life I want to sort out and accomplish this year. I want to get my next book finished so I can get my Christmas book started, along with other tasks.
I want to continue this life coaching programme and really hope you enjoy this year’s posts and videos I have put up on my main channel: https://www.youtube.com/@typicallondongal I have a weekend in a life to edit and put up and at the moment filming a week in a life.
I wanted to go out and meet with friends again,and so going to see some friends I made when I worked at Butlins, which is a holiday camp, again was brilliant and planning to do this again. Last weekend we went to a festival which I love. It was called Pub in the Park and many people with families went and want to do more just like that, and really looking forward to the Summer, and this week it is half term and got some birthdays next week, and life for me is about having as much time with my son Henry as possible and having different experiences, taking my time and getting out, enjoying what is around me and making time for myself.
Then there are courses I want to finish and want to get back in creating my own again.
So what are your plans? What do you want out of this year?
Take some time to decide if you haven’t already and don’t worry how big it is and when you want to do it, how long will it realistically take.
I wanted to do another charity walk and run, but I keep getting a pain in one of my legs, and so decided that I will continue to do walking along with running, to take part in these events again next year, but just want to build the strength in my legs again to do so.
Perhaps you are worried about going it alone and that you’d like to have someone else on board and they to want the same in their lives like you. Why not do it together as some people feel better in a group. It was good to do walks with others raising money together for charity. The ambition I had in doing the Great North Run was because I went out with friends and got talking to their friends, and said we’d do it together, but then they backed out, so went it alone but in doing that half a marathon saw many doing it as a group.
What do you envision? And who do you want to be in your life? What relationships do you want to be better and where do you see your life? What do you want to feel? Who is there?
I want to see different places this summer in the UK as Henry loves trains so would like to take him on trips, but of course if there may be industrial action on the trains means using other ways to travel, but still going to see if this is possible, and doing more work either in Childcare or Healthcare.
What do you not want to do this year? What areas do you want to change and make it better? What would you like to spend more time doing? It could be learning a new skill, well there are Adult Community colleges, and I did a few in writing, dancing and cake making as I wanted to make my son his first birthday cake, and dancing.
There are many online courses you can do. I am doing a life coaching course, enrolled in doing a psychology course and will help me towards learning about Child Psychology and want to do another writing course to help me and why not if you have always wanted to, write a book. Check out Youtube as there is a lot of training on doing this on there, along with many different things. I did a video on my other Youtube channel about how Youtube has saved me money: https://youtu.be/tBR1rN3Ti_8 there is a lot of training you can do for free.
If you want to have more holidays,but you have a tight budget. There are hostels you can stay in and I found booking the hotel and flights separately can save you a lot. I booked a brilliant hotel when I last went to Florida via Booklings.com and then booked flights and you don’t always have to pay for the hotel when you book, using Bookings.com.
Yes I had to save, but it is possible and check last minute deals. So your dreams can happen by asking and planning what you want out of this year.
Remember you can keep informed of my blogs on this site if you follow me and please like, as this helps me to know what to write about Let me know by writing in the comments below of what you want out of 2023.
Lets work together to build our dreams and enjoy life.
So yesterday was a day where some people were just being rude and reckless. First of all I let some guy pass me with his dog and got no thank you or acknowledgement, then a car pulled up close to the bus on the way home making the bus do a sudden stop, and then getting on the other bus I have to get on to go home, this person who got of the other bus aswell and get on the other decided to jump in front of me. This really annoyed me in that it did effect my mood. I made it clear to this guy that I wasn’t happy with what he had done and think of all the bad things I could do to make my case to him even more, but then thought to myself, “What would that achieve?”
There are always going to be people who will test you, and like that guy getting on the bus, he won’t change, there will always be those who push in, and I found now that I get a bit like that too and push in front, but then I will rein myself in and wait. At the end of the day never allow others people’s actions rub off on you as it reminds me that I will give up my seat whenever other people won’t and will acknowledge other people who have waited for the bus before me. I am not a saint but I do believe that if you do good for people you will get rewarded and it just makes the world a better place to live.
When it comes to being a good citizen is to not to allow others bad habits rub off on you and show especially when you have kids how to behave even when someone has been unkind and what is the right thing. I have over reacted on some occasions, for example when I thought I had left Henry’s water bottle at his swimming class had to go back and a women had a go at me for having the door open to the outside and so I said “Have you never forgotten anything?” and called her a horrible person and then started to get super angry.
This effected me in thinking will I ever reach my dreams because of that incident, but actually makes me more determined and if she wants to be unkind then let her be and the best thing is to learn about what not to do and how to be if someone I see has forgotten something and would help them find it, rather than be rude because they have the door open for a second.
I will keep being good to others and not allow people who are unkind effect my habits towards others it just leads down the wrong road and can escalate to not wanting to go out and having a good day Working in a call centre was tough as you did get people calling you names on the phone and be rude from the moment you have picked up the call, and so you had to hold yourself together and not to take it personally. Yet I would go home feeling my blood boiling and take my mood out on my husband and it would effect his mood and this became a habit, and made me feel that my life isn’t going anywhere, when that wasn’t true It was actually motivating me to be stronger and learn how to help people that aren’t so nice. This would make me feel also “Stop being nice” but then would ask “What would that Achieve?” I like being kind to others, and not all calls were bad some just needed help and would be happy, so it wasn’t that bad and helped me be better socially and would respect those when I called a call centre be kinda and politer, and not allow others bad habits of behaviour affect me in chasing my dreams and move on in my life.
So don’t allow other people’s actions cause you to think there is no other life out there, but use these challenges to help you to conquer your dreams even more.
Everyone can build a castle 