Hi yes it is that time again, a new Newsletter talking about my Life Coaching programme if you have read the blogs, and thank you if you have, and enjoy writing them, as I want to help everyone I can by sharing my own experiences in my life and share them.
Coming soon is my Autumn Reset, which is all about getting projects and jobs done and share this process through my blogs and videos on my Youtube channels, and I am still planning so more information will be coming soon. If you’d like to check out my Youtube channels, then please check out these links:
When my son was born premature it really scared me and didn’t have any idea of what was going to happen next. I had no inkling that Henry was going to be born early and I shut down any thinking of the future, and I am a planner. The evening my waters broke I was going through my diary of how many weeks I had to go and that evening i went to hospital and then on the Monday of being in hospital from the Saturday, my son was born, and I never felt so frightened in my life and if my son was going to be okay.
I love taking pictures of London and good way of helping trauma that has helped me, is taking pictures and people I love.
Yes having a child is a miracle and I did want children but it was the shock, that made me shut down and for once was not worrying about what was going to happen tomorrow.
I cried a lot. Taking one day at a time I just concentrated on doing what I could to feed Henry my milk and readjusting, when I could visit my son in hospital I did and helped with feeding, having cuddles and changing him, and take it step by step.
For me that is the best way, and just taking it slow.
Life has a way of surprising us, so it is important to live each day at a time. Yes I am into goal setting, but I do set goals daily as they arise and try not to worry about tomorrow all of the time. My Keyworkers, when my mental health wasn’t good, both said to take each day at a time, and is about getting back to recovery state so enjoy the days with my son, and rebuilding relationships that were on the brink of falling apart and concentrate on my health and on my environment. Getting back to doing the things I love, like blog writing, going for walks and spending time with my son.
I hope these blogs help you and lets support one another.
A good cry can do wonders, yet many say it is a sign of weakness which I do not believe. If you have had trauma in your life it can take a long time to heal, and everyone bodies way of grieving is personal to them, and the words that get me is when someone says “Cheer up”, because it is more than having a bad day, it can be the hardest thing we’ve ever faced.
Trauma can happen at any time and really knock us off our feet, and so often a person needs space and given comfort and compassion, and support to help recover.
Find someone who will truly listen to you, without making judgement but will just take in what you are telling them and help you make sense of it. Also writing, this has always helped me and when my Dad was badly hurt and was in hospital for a while, it was spending time playing out with my friends, and was looked after by my grandparents and neighbours in the housing estate I used to live. I will always be grateful for that, because I remember feeling some confusing and tried to lower the trauma I was facing at that time, by playing out, it helped take my mind away with what was happening.
Allow yourself to feel and if you need a bit of space then let people around you know and have that time to just feel and think, and when my son was born, which was early, at 31 weeks, I couldn’t see him for the first week as I had a viral infection, and it broke my heart, so took time to rest to recover, as it was a traumatic birth and so got as much rest as I could get, but even sitting some where like near a pond or the sea, if possible, it can help with being peaceful and calming, and can do wonders in dealing with your feelings.
If you feel you need medical help then talk to the doctor and don’t get fogged off, they are there to help you and can put you in touch with the Mental Health teams in your area, I was supported by Surrey Mental Health team and then the Merton Mental health team. They have many thing that they can help you with. like, putting you in contact with a Career Specialist, that they put me in contact with when I was ready to work outside again , and with my finances and free courses, in the fields I have been interested in, and there is a Recovery College which do free courses, and will continue to help you as you recover.
So, I hope these blogs are helping you and if you’d like to be updated when I post a blog on this site then press the Subscribe button on the top left of this site.
This blog was inspired by yesterday when I took a trip to North Greenwich and was unplanned but was brilliant, and sometimes the unplanned days are the better times and travelled by train and then by UberBoat. This you can pay by debit card, Oyster or tickets, and stops at different stops like Tower Bridge, and visited some shops, had a a drink and there are some brilliant things for kids, like a Trampolining place.
Doing trips like this really can boost your happiness and wellbeing, and today I feel so pumped up, because doing something I currently love, and that is spending time in the visiting others parts of the city where I don’t always go, reminds me that there is more to London than the rush hour and traffic.
When you start exploring it can really help to open your eyes, because I have been to North Greenwich before, but there were parts I still hadn’t seen and going by boat made a massive difference and not gone an UberBoat before, I did go to Tower Bridge before by boat, but not sure if that was the same one, but it made a lovely change to catching the bus, and then on our way came back to London Waterloo had a bite to eat before we caught the train to return home.
As I write this I think of Carrie Bradshaw in Sex and the City, and how she lived it up and hated the country side and I love the countryside too and going out of London, but I like to visit I love too and living in London there are so many places you can go, to still be with nature. Like one of my current loves is walking with my son, and we often walk along the Wandle river in Wimbledon where you can be around different birds, ducks and people walking their dogs or a families cycling.
I loved travelling on the River Thames, and seeing the Tower Of London, the Bridges and the O2, and seeing the tall buildings in Canary Wharf.
Are you a fan of the city or a the country? I’d love to read your thoughts and if you have ideas of other cities to visit. You can leave a comment below.
So thanks for the likes so far on my blogs, and my Autumn Reset will be coming and will post more details of this in the next few weeks.
When we feel low it often feels like we are falling down a hole and that there is nothing to enjoy and feel like hiding away. Start by going through your home that gives you comfort. For me right now I love sitting in front of my desk, listening to a video and writing this blog. I love sharing and helping you, and since I began this blog so much of my life has changed.
I am not going to force you to be thankful, because I have no knowledge of your life, but give tips, and so when I began to change my life, was when I had put on loads of weight and took up running. It was tough and I could have easily given up. I kept going, and went running along he seafront early in the morning so noone would see me, and with each run, my feelings towards my life, got better.
Now I enjoy walking, and I discovered my love from walking through running and so began to be thankful I had legs that can run or walk. You may be different, but finding a skill you didn’t know you had, can change that, and will help you to be thankful and there is a reason you are still here, and developing new relationships and visiting new places.
Moving away from home and following dreams to work in a holiday camp, I started to question my decision on deciding to do this, and was home sick for the first 3 weeks, but as I kept on getting used to living and working there, I began to enjoy being away and was grateful for this experience and met my husband and for while I was happy, this was before I began to feel low that I wrote about at the beginning of this blog.
There will always be bumps in the road in our life, but you can change it to be able to practice gratitude and has to begin right now, because if you are unhappy, with your life currently, it is time to make changes and enjoy life, to then be grateful.
When I became a parent I felt overwhelmed, and love my son, but felt like I had no idea of what to do, and kept feeling I was doing something wrong,, but watching him grow and becoming his own person, it has made me thankful that I am his mum and he is, my child and never thought I’d feel love like it. When he comes to have cuddles, it destroys my negative thoughts, as a parent and thankful for being able to grow this human being that I helped to create. I love at the moment playing football, with him and with his balloon. The other day we created a game with his balloon and so grateful for being able to play and create games to have fun and play.
I had really bad mental health illness, psychosis and it took me a lot to get back on my feet and recover, but with the help of my parents and mental health teams in Surrey and Merton, I am now recovered and can stand on my own two feet again, and thankful to my family and to my keyworkers, and the hospitals I stayed in, that helped me in this dark time I experienced.
So, as you build your life you will, hand on heart, start to see your life differently and who are thankful for you too.
Our thoughts can build up with having so much to think about, like making sure I have breakfast, and my son has his and going through my emails and running errands and not having enough rest.
When you get overwhelmed, it means you need to take some time for you to recharge your mind, by not using your mobile and switching it off or put on silent on some days, and have peace from the everyday stress, to reboot.
Having family time, playing games or watching a film or a nice meal together, chatting about our day and the challenges we had to faced and have all phones turned off and being present with one another.
No spend days. I did no spend January this year and it really has helped me manage my money and did videos on my main youtube channel documenting it (https://www.youtube.com/@typicallondongal) and I do no spend days and has helped me to have peace when it comes to money, as I have struggled and cutting down on items that aren’t important, and so I write my expenses and check my bank accounts, it helps recharge and not worrying about it all of the time, as it can play on your mind, and so manage your money can do wonders. I have another Youtube channel (https://www.youtube.com/@mywayofliving1602)
Reading. Take yourself away from the chaos and read. I did this, this evening and helps my mind to switch off and made myself comfortable to read and unwind. When I travel I often like to listen to an audio book and just keeps the mind from worries that travel can bring, but helps me to sleep too, when reading.
Music. I love listening to music, but no longer listen to it at night on my phone as it would affect my sleep and so now my mobile is faraway as possible, but when I am writing I like to listen to music, and I have a playlist dedicated to my book I am writing, currently, and when travelling too, if I don’t listen to an audiobook, and my tastes vary and created different playlists, which I love doing and play music to help my mood and with concentration.
Have a homely day. This is where I will spend time at home and put on some comfy clothes on, do some laundry, reading, do a walk around my local park and not travelling, and just chilling catching up on TV or Youtube. Anything that helps me to slow down and take in what is around me and feel my whole body breath and relax, and retune. Many of us are so used to running around, having to get to somewhere to get to work, that it can cause us to crash and so have a day where you can relax and do whatever you want that can help you switch off and slow down.
Spend time in a different place. This week we went to Shepperton by train, and went to the Loch there and it was so nice, watching the boats come and go. If you are not able to go on holiday far far away, visiting places for the day can be just as good. Life can get boring and feel like all we see is the same shops, the same four walls and I watch a channel called With Wonder, and she does hikes and runs, https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1YPvcxMTtdKz5ptonC3HZA You may wonder how hiking and running can help recharge the mind, but being someone who has run herself it can be the best thing for the body and mind, and just being somewhere new, is so therapeutic and me and my husband visited the South coast this year and I have filmed a vlog, so coming onto my main channel soon (https://www.youtube.com/@typicallondongal) and it was a good weekend, and so good to be somewhere different and want to visit more places by train or by car, and so can really help to recharge.
Social interaction. Summer time what is left of it, can be a great opportunity in recharging the mind, because it can be so relaxing to sit in a park, having a chat with some bubbly, and enjoying the sun, and each bring some food to share. In my local Park there always adults with children getting together. It can help children to, to socialise, in a safe place, with adults feeling relaxed, and not having to rush around, and discussing life.
So, I hope you have had a good summer. and enjoyed these blogs and soon it will be my next yearly programme Autumn Reset, but still got a some blogs to share for this Life Coaching programme, “Summer Project 2023” and thank you to those who have liked these blogs and I am definitely going to enjoy the last two weeks have of the summer holidays.
Yesterday was a really lovely day. It was almost affected coming back because of going through the gate at our local station, but there will always be those who think they are more important than you, and yes I did get annoyed but now it is the next day, I am not going to allow that, to ruin the joy I had yesterday.
Picture I took of the Shepperton Loch which was so lovely and recommend.
We went to Shepperton, which I have never been before and filmed a week in a life, coming soon, for my main youtube channel, where I post weekly vlogs, (https://www.youtube.com/@typicallondongal) and there was issues with the trains too, but had a nice meal in a local pub, called the Alex back in Wimbledon and in Shepperton visited the Loch and Canal there, which really helped with my mind and clear the cobwebs and we did some walking and completed over 11,000 steps and helped me in my thoughts.
Visiting a different place where you have never been before can really help, along with the weather too.
I know there are people who don’t always get to go out, and find commuting difficult, so if you can help them, then why not offer to take them out. My Uncle had a stroke some years ago, and it really turned his life upside down, and so my mum and aunty along with other family members would take him out and take him to see his daughter and grandchildren.
Our minds can get overwhelmed with every day challenges, so getting outdoors, seeing friends and family, doing a puzzle, listening to music and a hot bath for example, can really help in have peace and doing a brain dump and journaling your thoughts and feel at peace with our mind, which can help the body.
What can also help is extra rest, especially if you are a parent and work full time for example. All the things we need to remember and a overacting mind, which has been what I have suffered with. As soon as put my head on my pillow at bedtime my thoughts start to think of blog ideas and remembering what I need to do the next day and the worst case scenario and so taking time away from my phone and laptop and read, can be great in settling the mind.
Having clean and tidy spaces, and having a good drink you enjoy and catching up on a box set or doing a indoor workout, can all help to clear the head and relax the mind.
Its all about self care and development that leads to more positivity, and staying calm and feeling content with your thoughts, to your feelings.
This is something I journaled when away near the south coast of Britain in a caravan and is important to me because I do go back to the passed in my thoughts and of the future, but in order to plan for the future you have to live each day and be present, rather in a dream world all of the time.
So when I wrote this, it was to enjoy myself with my husband and son, and seeing friends and were friends who hadn’t met our son, and being present helped I feel, have a good weekend.
Write it out and I have just did a new page of my journal, to what I want to do right now and helping me to slow down and focus on one task at a time.
It helps me to prioritize, so I have laundry to sort out so going to, once written this blog, go and check to see if my clothes are dry and put another load on. I have an telephone appointment and so need to prepare for that and having breaks in between and not feel overloaded with stuff to do.
It helps manage the mind to prevent burn out, and not being stuck in one place all day, as this can effect concentration and our feelings along with our thoughts
I listen to experts about coffee, is it good or bad for you? I say if you like your daily coffee then have one. I enjoy my coffee each day and helps me through the day, I don’t always buy coffee from the coffee shop and have instant, because I enjoy having my coffee and will not sacrifice this, in anyway.
Researching coffee, it was said that it can cause anxiety, but someone who never for a long time drunk coffee, it was in my adulthood, had anxiety before I got into drinking coffee and It doesn’t trigger it at all. In fact I am a lot calmer now and yes I am on medication for my anxiety, but having a coffee helps my energy levels and I like to make the most of each sip, so if you like coffee then have one, and enjoy.
When I have appointments I like to have a coffee before or after, and use it to help me write and just good to be out of four walls. I like walking with a coffee and be out in the fresh air, and if you like this too, then enjoy.
When going out with my son Henry along with his dad, we’ll have a coffee and a chat. I couldn’t drink coffee all day, but like to have 2 cups early in the day, and is a ritual to me. Cold coffees never appealed to me, but now I actually love treating myself with a cold one, and sitting in the park and reading a good book.
I know with the weather it has been cold for a cold brew, but when it has been hot, I have made the most of it.
I wrote a blog like this one one of my google blogspot blogs:
It helps with my concentration and with being productive, and waking me up as it can take a while for me in the mornings to wake up, and helps kick start my day.
Life is worth living! Life doesn’t have to be boring, which can be the feeling you get when you feel your life isn’t going nowhere and that this it is how it’s going to be and nothing will change.
What would you like to be doing?
Where would you like to be in your life?
What do you wish your life to looked like?
Check out this EBook I wrote about Creating a new Journey to your life. It is available in Kindle and Paperback.
Set up a plan for yourself, of making your life better. For me a reading or listening to a book a great way to get out of a rut. Learning from others who have experienced how you have felt, is a great way to get a hold on your feelings to change your life.
I found Mel Robbins 5 Second Rule really helpful and reading a book by Paul McKenna and Tony Robbins to be good. Also doing free courses on the areas I want to learn more about. I want to help support people who have mental health difficulties, from child to adulthood and going to be doing Voluntary work soon, helping Children to read and would like to do online teaching on other topics, to help others like those who feel stuck, and that they not sure how to get over the low feelings and have a better life.
Managing my finances better has made a difference for me. There is still a long way and stop spending on things I do not need and focus on what is more important to help my wellbeing, and the way I feel about my life and you can do the same, just set aside 2mins to 10mins, can really help stop the worry that money can cause and get help.
I like watching Youtube channels like, Sugar mamma TV on money, because they have really helped with managing my money. I have listened to Canna Campbell, the 1000 Project and listened to the Audio book by Grant Cardone book, Sell or to be Sold.
I also watch Jordan Page, and Kate Kaden, and really inspirational and I have a Youtube channel, dedicated to finance and how I manage my money too: https://www.youtube.com/@mywayofliving1602
It’s all about changing your mindset and not have limited beliefs. Anyone in my opinion can be successful in building happiness and a better wellbeing, but you have to change your habits and have a hold on your life and where it is going.
I do have time off Social Media, which really helps and today I spent like I try to do on other days, away from my phone and enjoying the time with my son, not worrying about checking Instagram or Facebook.
Doing something different on some days. On Wednesday I took Henry to a football match and it was great. It helped that the team we went to support won, but made a difference on our feelings that my son couldn’t wait to share with his my mum and step dad and with his dad. He was buzzing and just made a great change.
Making time to see friends and having a night out or a girls night in. With the prices increasing on things it is affording things, so just meeting up one evening a week can really help ease the stress of life and taking time out for you.
Everyone can build a castle 