Hello, yes it is a Monday again, I can’t believe that it was last week we had travelled from to and from Bognor Regis and met up with friends. It was so good to get away and not think about to do lists, and just be.
This Cheat Sheet is all about what to do when you feel overwhelmed. These Cheat Sheets are completely free and please share.
I will be sharing this on my other site The Parenting Adventures Tips and Tricks too, because as parents we can get overwhelmed and just need that time out to recharge our batteries and lift our mood and our feelings so we can just have time to ourself and not everything has to be landed on your shoulders but shared.
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My life has not been pain sailing, like us all, there has been ups and downs and when my mum or dad told me off I would be like, it was the end of the world and that I am right and they’re wrong, and so unfair, and would envy my brother, because he is super confident, and girls running after him, whilst I sat on a bench at school by myself.
I have had to really work on my self. I could get jealous, bitter and self centered, like “How have they earned that?”, “Oh they are showing off and trying to be super popular”, or like when I was a primary school, a girl named Sherie, was so popular and all the boys fancied her, and everyone wanted her company and be friends with her. I felt ugly and envious, that I will never be her, like I wished to be.
My mental health took a turned for the worst, and battled with my feelings for a long time. There were times when I didn’t get out of bed, and would stay in, and now I have been discharged from the Mental Health hospital, so proud of myself that I got through my fight with my mental health and not allowing my inner critic to hold me back and stop feeling that I haven’t had a exciting life compared to others, and that the world is against me.
Here are some questions to ask,
Who do you want to be?
Do you feel unworthy and that you’ll never be as good as someone in your life?
Do you feel that noone understands you?
Writing a journal, can really help address your feelings and what is it that is really bothering you?
For me it was, well if I look like that, like Sherie, then I will be as popular and the kids would want to hang with me, but that wasn’t the case and started to form friends as I gradually went through school, but it took a long time, and would have fights and arguments and was bullied. In the end I was well respected at Primary school. It took the last year to experience that, but that I had come so far, and then wanted to start a fresh beginning, at secondary school.
The feelings didn’t disappear, and got stronger. I now look back it was once again that I wasn’t fitting in, and was told by a girl that I was boring, because I was a fan of a TV show The Bill, and would talk about it a lot, and took it, and glad for her honesty and yes it hurt my feelings, but then she wasn’t perfect and would get on people’s nerves, yet we did have fun together, so I let it go.
With those group of friends, they would be into wrestling and one of my friends did canoeing, and shared our love of music. They were the ones who got me into following a rugby team and when I felt like I couldn’t buy chips in McDonalds they got them for me, and introduced me to rock music and went to concerts together, and made friends at my dancing school, and my confidence began to increase.
I have been unkind, and blocked people, because I was feeling excluded and it really was affecting me, because felt it was a personal attack. Now though I glad that they have done well in their life and now in jobs that are high powered, and looking after themselves.
Our negative feelings can rub off on others. I have been with people who would constantly be complaining. I am lucky for having the people around me that keep the roof over my head and support me in looking after my son, and at the weekend I met up with friends who I met when I was working at a holiday camp, and felt so privileged to be in their company as we had a good catch up, and that we all, trying to build our lives and be happy. I can be awkward and shy still but when you meet people, and makes you feel that you’ve never been apart, the fear instantly goes, your inner critic gets pushed away making you feel that you are worthy and people love you, and stop putting your guard up, and not allow your fears get the better of you, but make you grow and be the person you wished to be, and telling people that you love them, can help you and them. There are a lot of people I love, because they have been a huge importance to my life, and been a great influence. I am kind, I will be on time, and I will make the effort.
When you have been through trauma, it can make you angry, and “Why me?”, “What have I done to deserve it?” and often its nothing, its life, it can be unpredictable. Noone knows what is around the corner for us, and so, talking about growing our happiness, ask yourself, do you want to be unhappy all through your life? I have had to rebuild, and make sense of situations, but often there isn’t an answer. I no longer want my inner critic stop me from going swimming and going for walks, from spending time with my son, and go for opportunities, that can open many doors for me. I no longer want to be counting calories, and worrying about my weight. If biscuits are going to make me feel guilty, then I am not going to eat them, if someone doesn’t say thank you when you open the door for them, because what’s the point, they don’t care and not allow me to have a bad day, but continue to be kind and not allow their ignorance to rub off.
So lets all work together in building and growing our lives, its never too late to be happy and grow your feelings, to feel better about yourself. I do write a blog where I talk about building confidence. Check it out via this link: https://buildingselfconfidencetud.blogspot.com/
This is a lyric from an Adele song, “I Drink Wine” and from watching a video about That Girl, I for a long time would copy friends because I felt well they’re doing that and feel to meet my own high expectation of myself, had to be like that too.
Be yourself. Wear clothes that represent you. Cook meals that you like and find your own style. I love clothes and I enjoy putting outfits together, check out my blog carries versatile fashion and getting the most out of them, and yes I do save pins on Pinterest on Fashion, https://www.pinterest.co.uk/thetypicalLondongal/ because I like different looks but that I know I am wearing that outfit because it actually suits me, and not feel I have to wear an outfit to impress someone else.
That’s not me.
I like to put my own stamp on looks that I like and styles that suit me and having fun with clothes and not taking it too seriously and feel free as a bird now when it comes to my self image. I write a blog called Building Self Confidence the Ugly Duckling, and talk about how I struggled with not be happy of the way I looked. I remember saying once, when one of my friends commented on my earrings, “Well because you were wearing earrings” and as soon as I said these words, was like “No don’t say that” and couldn’t come back from it and saw them look at each other, like oh really, and the reason why they were friends was because we all had our own style.
They were more confident than me and seemed to be in jobs that were better than mine and had a lot going for them, whilst I felt inadequate, and they were better than me, and knew more people than me. Which now that is not the case.
I have a lot of friends and going to see some this weekend, and no longer feel that I don’t fit or that I have to be like them, but because I love seeing and hanging out with them, because they are different and feel I got to look a certain way for someone else’s approval.
That is not the case. I have had to learn that noone is out to get me and that feel not good enough because my friends are doing better than me in life and in fact using their success to help me to grow and build my life into one that I like, and accept myself at last.
I like admiring other people and I do have a style icon, Jennifer Aniston, and am influenced, but still remembering her clothes suit her because that is her style and that her body shape and appearance is hers and not mine but can use it to try different looks that potentially suit me and I never going to be Jennifer Aniston. She is her own person, and I am mine, so no longer feel pressure that I have to look a certain way.
Let me know what you think. I like feedback so please leave a comment below. I’d like to take this opportunity to say thank you to my subscribers and welcome if you are new here and please subscribe then you will be alerted each time I post.
I think it is natural to think the worst, because from experience, think if I don’t worry than I worry if things go wrong and that I let the world down, because I wasn’t prepared. Our feelings can be so strong that we fear stepping another foot forward.
Life can be full of setbacks and things we come across that can knock us off, on our path for the life we want, but not allowing these to get us down and gain control so whatever happens we resilient to set backs.
I was working for a Kids Holiday Club a few years ago and it was tough and the day the Team Manager wasn’t there I was left in charge but my anxiety rose and thankfully the other girl, I asked for her to take charge instead. I felt so stupid, and getting excited of the opportunity I had really failed and that I was useless and there was a lot to do and in the end I didn’t continue with it.
To be fare it wasn’t a very good set up because it was two three playworkers with 15 children which wasn’t for health and safety perspective good and thought there would be more playworkers and more structure. A toilet ended up getting flooded, two brothers were fighting non stop and in the end the company stopped running and so I learned that if I do this again, to find out first if there will be more staff and the ratio of children.
Now though thankfully I didn’t allow it to stop me in building my life and take a different direction and would like to work with children in a educational setting and do more training to do so, and to help children with different needs, making sure I have the right support to do so, and stop jumping in with both feet and gradually build my ambitions to continue in following my dreams.
Also I have started to cook different dinners and changing my eating habits as this is a battle. I haven’t have stopped eating crisps all the time and have cut down on eating chocolate and going for the biscuits and so going to set a plan and reflect on your set backs as it can help you to have a better habits and it could be because they are so easy to reach and eating fruit can be boring and have a lot of vegetables and not snack.
I never want to have type 2 diabetes again and have a more balanced diet so have started planning meals again and still have the food I like but no snacking. I have had a eating disorder and so what to stop fighting over my eating habits but have new habits of having healthier breakfasts, nice lunches and dinners.
I am going to have breakfast later as I am not always that hungry in the mornings and continue my habits such making my bed when I get up, get dressed, get my so ready for school and taking my supplements and other medication I have to take and not battle with my eating habits, as it is tiring. Planning is the key and have been very good and continue to exercise to help be fitter and continue going swimming which I have begun to do again and training indoors.
I didn’t realise I had a Journal APP in my phone and been entering it everyday, and fill it in on want it is concerning me and address my feelings. I still like to write, but find it hard to stick too so now I got this APP makes me make sure I use my Journal APP each day, and use what ever to make things simple and easy access. Reading Atomic Habits has really helped me structure my life and not spend so long on one thing, but break it down and use what is easy access.
So as it is Sunday finishing this blog, going to catch up on Youtube and get ready for the new week ahead. I do vlogs so if you’d like to see these check out my Channel via this link: https://www.youtube.com/@typicallondongal
So this week has been testing as my son has had a tummy bug, and just dropped bar of soap down the toilet, but that’s life we will get bad luck, like missing the bus, being late for a appointment when you left with plenty of time, lost something or the item you wanted in the shop has gone.
There are different forms of bad luck and I was scammed last year by an email making it was PayPal and they were going to take a payment and hacked my laptop, not the one I am using now but one I had before and stopped using it. So if you get any emails like that ignore and never give out any personal details, and contact your bank.
You may think “This is typical”, “It is always me” but it’s not. Life is full of challenges and can stop you in your tracks. Yet some good things have happened too. Like a new opportunity, which I am not going to share yet but been something I have wanted to do since a kid and love music, and had recruitment meeting about it and after posting a new blog on my site: My Books and Stories, had ten likes already: https://mybooksandstories.wordpress.com/2024/02/28/develop-stories-to-create-a-book/
Being a parent (check out my, The Parenting Adventures tips and trick), kids will get sick and it was only a small bar or soap and so all I need to do is replace it and made sure Henry is washed and seen a doctor and now on the mend, and for me I feel it is a message to not worry that I haven’t filmed for my Youtube channel or sorted out cupboard upstairs, family comes first and focus on helping my son get better and that its time you slowed down and stop doing 25 things at one time and slow down for your health and wellbeing.
We put some much on our shoulders that we feel bogged down and where we can be like “What’s the point”, but everytime you do that, the more your wellbeing will be affected by not taking action to look after ourselves.
A car needs to stop so you don’t run out of petrol and we can run out of energy because we blame ourselves for bad luck when it is part of life and not allow it to control you, but learn from it to help prevent bad luck. Like putting the soap in a soap dish and when we make sure our kids rest to get over sickness, that you rest too and take care that it not passed on to you and forget emails. with my son being off from school have been spending time cuddling and doing all we can to help each other, and our kids wash their hands and not kissing but just spending time together to get back to normality and he can go back to school and I can get shopping or do other errands and jobs on my tasks list and clean to prevent sickness and infections. Then following the doctors advise and what it states to do online to help get back from sickness.
So never allow bad luck get to you down and share what you do to handle bad luck and tips. You can leave a comment below.
Hello and welcome! It is Monday again and it is time for another Cheat Sheet which are completely free to download and please share if you wish.
This weeks Cheat Sheet is about Spending time with friends which can be so good for you and have a catch up and rather than being on your own all the time invite a friend to join you.
Social interaction can be a good source of therapy, sharing your problems and doing things you can enjoy with somebody else, like working out together, going out and share a flask of coffee or tea, and grow your relationships.
It is Monday again and last week it was my sons half term break and now is back to school, I am back setting my tasks for the week.
This weeks Cheat Sheet is about Getting back from a break as it good to forget to do’s and have fun with your kids, and then getting back to the regular routine once the break is over.
Life doesn’t have to be hard and I have learned to listen to my body and work on different areas of my life and show up. I took a break from my blogs and it has been good, and focus on completing my projects like my next book I want to publish, but yesterday I felt wiped out and something I have been trying to stop, and have had a cut off time to get off of my laptop, and that is to finish using my laptop by 2 or 2:30 each day and it has made a difference, but because I had three free days as my son was at a holiday worked on filming and editing vlogs, working on videos on my other Youtube channel, and my books, had to take an earlier break from the laptop and glad I did.
Listen to your body and be realistic with planning and include breaks. I take exercise breaks when sitting down for a long period of time, so will get up and move my body, by going out for a walk, or use the treadmill and do a workout on my legs and with my dumbells, and getting my body used to walking long distance again and eventually get back into running. I fill this boosts my energy and did go out early yesterday in the morning, so still got things done.
I needed to be off my screen, and watch some TV and was watching Robbie Williams documentary on Netflix and it was good but was falling a sleep and struggled to keep my eyes open and then took Henry to McDonalds and was a nice change, and would like to do this again with my son.
The other thing I did was tidy my bedroom and filmed a vlog and because my son was going to a holiday club as it is half term and it helps get things done, but getting up early takes its toll and feel better for switching off and going to plan a full week to take a break away from filming and off my laptop, and it is good to have a detox away from devices as it can feel to me tiring and feel I need to just take a break.
I was feeling restless and thought that my son had a inset day at school next Monday and I find out that there isn’t so had to contact the taxi company as my son gets transport to school because of distance and is in a Land school, to so wanted to make sure he gets picked up on Monday, and also I am going to be doing a Level Counselling course and so had to do a test for that.
So if you are tired and restless, have low energy take a break to feel better and look after your mind and body as looking after ourselves is very important.
This weekly Cheat Sheet, which if you are new, began this year to help you to have a good week and enjoy each day, by sharing tips on how to make the most of your days and evenings, now we are heading towards spring, and in some countries starts to have more day light.
Hello, it is time to start a new week, and means getting our to do’s written on what you want to accomplish today, and in forming good habits, can help with having a good day and week, so check out this weeks, Cheat Sheet which I post on this channel and parenting channel, https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.com
Many thanks for reading, and if you wish to share this sheet and blog then please do. Lets work together to help us to enjoy life and getting out life together.
Everyone can build a castle 