I know a lot of coaches and health experts say to get out of your comfort zone, and that is me included and have changed that mindset. I have begun to realise that this can often lead to stress and anxiety, and so from my own self I like to take it step by step, rather than jumping in with both feet and hating every minute of it.
There are many things I have wanted to do something that I never thought I could do and that is speak publicly to people and from watching others film their life, to help others I have three Youtube channels and now working on radio.
At school I was mocked when we had to play game, where we had to, for one minute talk about an object or subject and I was stuttering and wanted the earth to swallow me up and it made me for a while fearful of talking in front of the class and yet, as a young child performed in shows when I did tap and ballet had no fear and loved it.
When you grow from being a child into an adult your awareness increases of ourselves and begin to have feelings we have never had before and I was super shy at one point. I attended a drama school and was fearful, and I just froze and just sat there and didn’t know what to do and the teacher watching,f was really looking at me as if I poohed in the class and just wanted to run and not come back.
Yet I loved dancing and when I got to be in a school play again loved it and performed in assembly’s but when it came to speaking out I was a nervous wreck.
Doing Drama helped me and how I gained my confidence to talk in front of people and planning on what I was going to say and I was shy going to my first session of ballroom dancing and soon overcome my shyness and found the skill I was good at and it bought me out of shell and glad I took the chance and it was through a friend, and going with a friend can make it less daunting if you want to do something that you have always wanted to do, and can make it fun and take the fear away.
So never allow your fear to avoid chances because it can have a real positive effect to lead to other chances.
I thought that I would never be married at one point as I went through the phase of not believing in it and thought it was just a piece of paper and I never had a lot of boyfriends in my teens and twenties didn’t really want to be with anyone, but felt I should, to keep up with others who had boyfriends but realised no, I living by their means and not my own. I just enjoyed my Youth and in 2002 I made a decision that I needed to follow my dream in working at a holiday camp. I wanted to be a red coat, but it didn’t happen, because I met my husband and in 2006 got married and then in 2013 I fell pregnant.
Me and my son
Life is full of surprises, because when I first applied to work at a holiday camp was turned down and didn’t get further in the process of actually being employed and so it took two years, and so was a surprise that my second year of trying, I was successful and I was home sick, for the first two weeks but then stayed down there, for about 5 years. I never became a red coat, and part of me is sad about that, but it still was a life changing experience.
Be prepared for surprises by setting goals and when you want to achieve them. Back in 2013 my son was born premature and it was a shock. A week or so before reading a mother and baby magazine, I saw an article about premature births and ignored it, thinking “I didn’t need to read that” and wished I had.
When working at a call center there was a colleague who was a web designer and feel bad because I was unkind because I was jealous of her that she went on to be a Senior Agent and I didn’t, but it made me make changes to my life when I read a book, called The WAGS Diary and started writing a blog. I am not a WAG by the way and would be fully surprised if that ever happened. I like to watch football but on the TV or if I fancy going to see a football match, but not looking to date a footballer. No offence to those who do.
Back in 1990 after not really bothered about football I began to play in the school playground, as the other girls in my class were and so “If you can’t beat them join them” and cried for two hours after England got beat by West Germany in a penalty shoot out. Overnight became a full on football fan and fell in love with it and I changed my image, from being a girlie girl to a tom boy.
I had changed from wanting to be a singer to wanting to become, not a player but a coach and created this character in my head called Sherie, from a girl I used to go to school with, and be the first woman in a men’s team and later in 2012 I did my FA Coaching badge and ended up managing a football team, at youth level, and coached girls and boys team.
This is surprising myself that if I want something then I can get it but I have to do for myself and not rely on others, and standing on my own too feet. I fell in love with rugby league, with a friend who knew I liked sport, and followed the team for 8 years, and then stopped to work at a holiday camp.
Going through that really surprises me, as it felt such a long way off, for all those things happening, so follow your dreams as you will be surprised of what you can do in your life that will surprise you each and everyday, of your life.
Hello, it is time to start a new week, and means getting our to do’s written on what you want to accomplish today, and in forming good habits, can help with having a good day and week, so check out this weeks, Cheat Sheet which I post on this channel and parenting channel, https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.com
Many thanks for reading, and if you wish to share this sheet and blog then please do. Lets work together to help us to enjoy life and getting out life together.
Hi and welcome to my blog! I am posting every Monday a cheat sheets to help you manage your day and manage your life and my one for today is about Making life Simple and stop betting overwhelmed in getting your life together.
I have decided to take step back from my blogs, to focus on growing other areas, to share content. This won’t be for a long time, and will sharing my cheat sheets I have created still: Check out my Weekly Cheat Sheet and Weekly Cheat Sheet: Wake up in the morning feeling ready for the day on this blog site and my other blog: https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.com and posting my first Newsletter for 2024, but not writing new content, to take break and will be back in March, because I will doing my Yearly Life Coaching Programme, Summer Project 2024, and my Autumn Reset.
I do these years from May through to August and my Autumn Reset from September through to October.
Check out my youtube channels, my other blog sites and my Social Media platform:
You have to make the right choices for you. It means saying no, but finding what is right, and if it doesn’t then that is fine. Saying yes because you feel obliged to, is not making the right choice, because you are not doing it for you and if it is going to stress you out and fill you with dread, then means you have to change it and go down a different path. This doesn’t mean you won’t succeed it just there can be many roads to take to reach the things you want to do in your life.
If it is not for you, then it is not for you. Not everything is going to workout, and if someone says no to you, then that is okay too. Trust yourself in making the right decision, journal or talk to someone who can help you, and reflect on why on this occasion something has not worked out, or doesn’t feel right.
Dip your toe in. Test it out. Research and try it out. There is no harm in giving things a go, before you make your mind up. I remember when I was first looking for work, just leaving school and was interested in working in fitness, and was offered work experience for the day, to see how it felt and it wasn’t for me at that time and wanted to work in a football club, and was successful, and worked at a local football club as a steward and did work experience too helping the Groundsman and then found my office job whilst doing that in London.
I did some football training, with the Fulham ladies and it was only a few sessions, and made me decide that I wanted to coach, and gain experience. I was a little regretful as my confidence really affected me in going, but I am glad I still gave it a try. Twenty or so years later I did an FA qualification whilst working in a call center and got to manage my own team, and learned from it, so it still taught me a lot and now we are in 2024 going to “Grow” which is my word for this year. It was progression but grow fits better and get another book published, do more training and looking for work outside and continue to grow as a writer, and have a lot of great things planned and it is planning that can help decide on where you want to go next in your life that will boost your feelings and raise your happiness, to not allow times when it didn’t workout, affect you, in following your dreams.
I always wanted to write a book, and as a kid I liked writing, but stopped and now found my love again, in writing and now written 5 books, which are on amazon my most recent being a comedy called Mum&Me. I now am writing three books, a book called When Mothers Are Real and Behind the eyes of the other woman, and Mum&Me book 2, and it was by watching TV that I discovered self publishing, and I really enjoy it, and now looking to work outside, and finish my courses I have enrolled on, to help build my knowledge and understanding of the human mind, and children and young people by educating myself, to help grow my blogs and books, to help you my audience, to find happiness and live a life they love.
Listening to the right people, who can give you the right support you need can make all the difference, and there are many ways to train and learn, without it being too much and if it is affordable. Last year via a careers service received some free training and I want to learn more interventions, to help people and getting to know the mind.
Our minds are constant running machines and it can either work for you or against and want to learn about how to, being a mum for example communicate more affecting to my son who had ADHD and is on the Autism Spectrum. Why we can be positive one minute and down the next.
Reading books about topics you want to learn more about, can be really helpful. I am currently on Audible listening to Atomic Habits and want the physical book, I have read to help me with my writing, Save the Cats Write a Novel and again want the physical book because I felt it helped and continue to learn as a writer, and want to do more writing courses.
So, never stop believing in yourself and trust your gut instinct. If you say no that is fine. It is all about what makes us happy, and lowering the expectation we set for ourselves.
Just to let you know I write a daily blog now, that I did before and then took a break, but wanted to get back into posting on that blog site, because I enjoy it and sharing many things. Here is a link: https://mydailythougthsandfeelings.blogspot.com/
A picture I took from this weekend as I write this book, and visited Wimbledon Common on a Winter walk
If you didn’t know I have uploaded a new Newsletter so here is the link to that: November Newsletter 2023 I post one each month, and so check it out.
So getting from A to B. We spend a lot of time rushing around, travelling to different places and means dealing with delays on transport, the weather and errands you can’t avoid like getting ready for the different seasons, and Christmas can be so stressful that can make us become humbugs. Then there is dealing with emails, appointments and getting ready, if you have Children ready for school. So getting to A to B in life can come with many hurdles.
We will face challenges in our lives, and there is no avoiding them. Getting through childhood I found was hard, because I did find it hard to make friends and get to grips with things that happened, through childhood, like people dying, I didn’t understand life and death, and feared it for a while. I would live in a daydream a lot, and wished I spent more time taking it all in, and appreciated the things we did, like the weekends, where I’d played at my nans houses, did dancing lessons, whilst my brother played football. This was each weekend at a local recreation ground. We would spend time in pubs and all I wanted to do was go back home, and when those times stopped I really missed them. Those days were great and would be around lots of people that made me laugh and this was before the internet and social media and would go on some really good fun holidays. We’d go round to peoples homes, and stayed over, or they came round to us, and would squabble, trying to torment my brother a lot, and we’d have toy fights and would go to birthday parties and Christenings and it was such a brilliant time, and thanks to social media I have got back in touch with people, from those times and thankful for that.
When it comes to school and doing homework I couldn’t wait to those days to be over. Thinking and understanding my life, I actually did alright, and writing that, its the first time I felt that it was okay, and it was only the food at school that was bad, thinking about Primary School. Going on day trips, and spending time with friends and make the most of what we had in the UK, being British. It was my confidence that affected me, and feeling like I was climbing up a mountain and not making it up to the top, unless it came to playing sports or dancing, and because I would do badly in tests and remember dreading Secondary School, being so different to primary school.
I did go on to the sixth form year of my school, and felt I had a good level of freedom, but to be honest I had enough of education, and then started working, and I did write a blog about how I found work life, was good for me, and my knowledge of the world thrived and enjoyed the working environment and started going out around London, and on the first full time job, was taken from London to Lille on The Euro star and, parts I found hard, it wasn’t always great, but loved the fact I was earning my own money and forming relationships that was fun, and I am so glad I had that time to just enjoy my teens and early twenties.
It is important to enjoy the early years and when it comes to Christrmas, to embrace the people you love in your life and not worrying about it being better than the last, which I often have felt, because life isn’t a competition, and getting rid of resentment and begruding each other success, is important, because that is only going to flare other negative emotions and can lead you being alone. Pay each other compliments and really listening to people and celebrate each others achievements and how they are building their life.
Live life together and stop knocking it down.
If you feel your life is going backwards then Reset, and Relfect. This is where keeping a journal helps, going through things that you feel is causing you to have these feelings. That is what they are, feelings that can be controlled. This is where my Autumn Reset can help, and help finish tasks, to then start a fresh, and I will go through my lists and set a plan to get things finished, making sure I leave time to have some fun. Weekends I spend with my son, having plenty of exercise, watching TV I don’t always get to watch, in the week and just having time to hug, kiss and take in every minute. Life can be tiring, and it okay to be tired, we are all human, and that we spend time having a nice hot bath, read a book, doing some retail therapy, and not to be buy clothes but food we love to eat, stuff to decoarate our homes with and buying new things for our kids and bringing smiles to everyone in your life, faces.
Getting to A to B in life shapes you, depending on the paths you have chosen and if things haven’t worked out, brush yourself off and carry on.
When my son was born premature it really scared me and didn’t have any idea of what was going to happen next. I had no inkling that Henry was going to be born early and I shut down any thinking of the future, and I am a planner. The evening my waters broke I was going through my diary of how many weeks I had to go and that evening i went to hospital and then on the Monday of being in hospital from the Saturday, my son was born, and I never felt so frightened in my life and if my son was going to be okay.
I love taking pictures of London and good way of helping trauma that has helped me, is taking pictures and people I love.
Yes having a child is a miracle and I did want children but it was the shock, that made me shut down and for once was not worrying about what was going to happen tomorrow.
I cried a lot. Taking one day at a time I just concentrated on doing what I could to feed Henry my milk and readjusting, when I could visit my son in hospital I did and helped with feeding, having cuddles and changing him, and take it step by step.
For me that is the best way, and just taking it slow.
Life has a way of surprising us, so it is important to live each day at a time. Yes I am into goal setting, but I do set goals daily as they arise and try not to worry about tomorrow all of the time. My Keyworkers, when my mental health wasn’t good, both said to take each day at a time, and is about getting back to recovery state so enjoy the days with my son, and rebuilding relationships that were on the brink of falling apart and concentrate on my health and on my environment. Getting back to doing the things I love, like blog writing, going for walks and spending time with my son.
I hope these blogs help you and lets support one another.
This is something I journaled when away near the south coast of Britain in a caravan and is important to me because I do go back to the passed in my thoughts and of the future, but in order to plan for the future you have to live each day and be present, rather in a dream world all of the time.
So when I wrote this, it was to enjoy myself with my husband and son, and seeing friends and were friends who hadn’t met our son, and being present helped I feel, have a good weekend.
Write it out and I have just did a new page of my journal, to what I want to do right now and helping me to slow down and focus on one task at a time.
It helps me to prioritize, so I have laundry to sort out so going to, once written this blog, go and check to see if my clothes are dry and put another load on. I have an telephone appointment and so need to prepare for that and having breaks in between and not feel overloaded with stuff to do.
It helps manage the mind to prevent burn out, and not being stuck in one place all day, as this can effect concentration and our feelings along with our thoughts
So yesterday was a day where some people were just being rude and reckless. First of all I let some guy pass me with his dog and got no thank you or acknowledgement, then a car pulled up close to the bus on the way home making the bus do a sudden stop, and then getting on the other bus I have to get on to go home, this person who got of the other bus aswell and get on the other decided to jump in front of me. This really annoyed me in that it did effect my mood. I made it clear to this guy that I wasn’t happy with what he had done and think of all the bad things I could do to make my case to him even more, but then thought to myself, “What would that achieve?”
There are always going to be people who will test you, and like that guy getting on the bus, he won’t change, there will always be those who push in, and I found now that I get a bit like that too and push in front, but then I will rein myself in and wait. At the end of the day never allow others people’s actions rub off on you as it reminds me that I will give up my seat whenever other people won’t and will acknowledge other people who have waited for the bus before me. I am not a saint but I do believe that if you do good for people you will get rewarded and it just makes the world a better place to live.
When it comes to being a good citizen is to not to allow others bad habits rub off on you and show especially when you have kids how to behave even when someone has been unkind and what is the right thing. I have over reacted on some occasions, for example when I thought I had left Henry’s water bottle at his swimming class had to go back and a women had a go at me for having the door open to the outside and so I said “Have you never forgotten anything?” and called her a horrible person and then started to get super angry.
This effected me in thinking will I ever reach my dreams because of that incident, but actually makes me more determined and if she wants to be unkind then let her be and the best thing is to learn about what not to do and how to be if someone I see has forgotten something and would help them find it, rather than be rude because they have the door open for a second.
I will keep being good to others and not allow people who are unkind effect my habits towards others it just leads down the wrong road and can escalate to not wanting to go out and having a good day Working in a call centre was tough as you did get people calling you names on the phone and be rude from the moment you have picked up the call, and so you had to hold yourself together and not to take it personally. Yet I would go home feeling my blood boiling and take my mood out on my husband and it would effect his mood and this became a habit, and made me feel that my life isn’t going anywhere, when that wasn’t true It was actually motivating me to be stronger and learn how to help people that aren’t so nice. This would make me feel also “Stop being nice” but then would ask “What would that Achieve?” I like being kind to others, and not all calls were bad some just needed help and would be happy, so it wasn’t that bad and helped me be better socially and would respect those when I called a call centre be kinda and politer, and not allow others bad habits of behaviour affect me in chasing my dreams and move on in my life.
So don’t allow other people’s actions cause you to think there is no other life out there, but use these challenges to help you to conquer your dreams even more.
Everyone can build a castle 