Motivational tips to help you if this is a particular busy time of year, especially at work and help you get through it! BLOGMAS DAY 10!

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Using empowerment and inspiration when its just not your day!

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Hello and welcome to BLOGMAS DAY 8!

Just now and whilst out having a coffee, I was trying to add images on my blog sites on WordPress.com, which I will link below, to give them an extra lift, add as an extra introduction so readers like yourself can have an idea of what each site is about, without too much information.

I Wanted to,

“Throw in the towel” as they say and chuck my laptop out of the window and give up.

Well in the coffee shop my son decided soon after I began, that this was the time to run off and start to use the coffee shop as a playground and speak to a fellow coffee drinker’s dog, whilst he wanted to run around.

Yes perhaps I should have waited until I got home but as it appeared that my son seemed happy to sit and eat his Sunday Treat and daddy was there aswell should our son want something, I thought I would be a little productive and revamp my blogs on the go, saving me the time to do it at home.

NO SUCH LUCK!

Children seem to have a radar, that as soon as it appears that me, mummy a lot of the time, wants to do something other than play hide and seek or watching him eat his Muffin, it’s time to PLAY UP AND BE A PAIN IN THE BUTT!

You may think that this is mean, how could I think this of my own son?

BECAUSE it is true. I am only saying what other people are thinking, including parents, but often are to afraid to say.

KIDS CAN BE A NIGHTMARE WHEN ALL YOU WANT IT A PARENTAL HAZARD!

I know that it doesn’t sound too bad initially. “What A child talking to a dog?” Many children are attracted to animals but I know what it is like pre-child when you are trying to have a quiet coffee and a little child innocently wants to chat and you smile politely thinking it will be a quick greeting, the child will soon lose interest and then you can get back to your drink and private conversation.

As children do as I have discovered since becoming a parent myself (check out my parenting blog sites and books) that they often will have other ideas to you. My son will often if he sees a dog, not leave it alone or the customer and then kick off when we leave because he wants to stay and when he is fixed on something, it becomes very difficult to get his attention and get him away.

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED! and what you learn as you go, how to detonate a tantrum before they begin. SO WE THANKFULLY HAD FINISHED OUR COFFEE AND GOT THE HELL OUT OF THERE AS HE BEGAN TO KICK OFF!

QUICK TIP#When a child does start to show signs of a tantrum brewing, they will give you the puppy eyes, try to do what I call “Selective hearing” where you can see that they are hearing you but they are pretending to not and ignore you as if you aren’t saying a thing or they start to drag there feet and do what he I call the “Body Flop”, to say “I am moving because you say so, but going to make it as difficult and time consuming as possible” or stamp their feet and use their favourite word, which they think is yes to them a lot,

So to destroy the triggers or a tantrum before it occurs, you can do the whole thing of pre-warning, it can work, but again Henry will often use this to “Pretend he can’t hear or you didn’t say anything”, but I will show him the cup and say, because he works on visual rather than words, “We are finished now, time to go” and take his focus away immediately from the customer and dog, for example, by getting and taking him by the hand calmly, with a steady voice, and instantly get him to focus on things that will make him laugh as to something that will cause him to kick off but not on the dog that he doesn’t want to leave onto something else that brings him joy outside. Henry loves crossing roads, because he loves seeing the Green Man light up and seeing buses and planes fly over.

THAT IS USING EMPOWERMENT AND INSPIRATION! THE MORE YOU TEACH KIDS TO FOCUS ON THINGS THAT MAKE THEM HAPPY WITHOUT NEEDING TO GIVE ANY PUNISHMENT OR TAKE THEIR JOY AWAY, THE MORE IT HELPS THEM AND HELPS YOU TO CONTINUE TO HAVE A GOOD DAY WITHOUT FIREWORKS SETTING OFF AND DESTROYING YOUR DAY!

So I decided to continue to add images to my blogsites when I got home, as to be honest I didn’t have any other images on my phone to add that I liked, so by using Microsoft publisher on my laptop I did find others and after I tried several attempts to try an add a particular image, my laptop which is varely old, decided at that precise moment to not, “To play ball” and not allow me to continue.

Me and my adorable laptop have a kind of love hate relationship with one another, its been going on for years,

I LOVE IT WHEN IT WORKS AND HATE IT WHEN IT DOESN’T.

It can have the tendency to crash whilst I have been half way through writing a blog or one of my books, to which I have had to restart the bloody thing, and have lost all my work, because I was not able to save it, to then start again.

Luckily, unlike those experiences and learning from them did save my work before it began to think otherwise and so restarted it to see if I was able to do what I had intended to do, AND YES THAT WAS ALL DONE!

This is where empowerment can come in handy, because part of empowerment as I see it, is,

There is a video by one of my favourite people who I talk a lot about on this site called, Mel Robbins, who now has her own show in America and she does Youtube videos too, and she did one about “This is what I struggle with”, and basically she shares the story of a recent happening, where she got to her Yoga class early for a change rather than on the dot or a minute or so late, to find that the place where she did the yoga class, was closed.

“CAN YOU GUESS WHAT HER FIRST THOUGHT WAS?”

I bet you can relate.

She instantly had the thought of “Not going to the class and to go for a coffee instead”.

This can happen when things “Don’t go our way” we instantly go into the “negative mode” like I was and like Mel Robbins says, those negative thoughts will always be there so to PERSEVERE do something that can SNAP YOU OUT OF IT.

Doing the Mel Robbins technique of the 5 second rule or just by saying “NO I AM GOING TO DO THIS” out loud or in your head, can help get you out of the negative thought and do what you intended or stop you from feeling low because things have gone wrong that day and you can continue without anymore self criticism.

When I was out one morning, this year after dropping my son off at school I then went to my local shopping mall to buy some birthday gifts for my sons birthday and for someone elses.

I, who often gets excited about finding items in stores that I want to buy without looking for ages, picked the items up that I thought “Oh yeah that would be a great gift” without checking the contents I was carrying first, which would allow me to pay for those gifts. I got to the till was already being served and was ready to pay and realised before I had the chance to say “Sorry I can’t buy these today” had the wrong bank card.

SO WHAT DO THINK I DID?

Well of course the “negative voice” went straight into action.

I did the whole thing of trying to style it out, not wanting the cashier to think I have now just wasted her time by scanning items that now were not going to be bought and now she was going to have to put them all back again, or that I was pulling a fast one by purposely not wanting to pay up, by exaggerating that I had been a right “KLUTZ” and usually I am the “Super organized Mother On the Planet” and I had forgotten the card I needed to pay and “I’m really sorry” in a way that says “I promise I won’t do that again and please don’t hate me” and then with trying not to be too embarrassed or ashamed, as she did look a bit put out, I did the walk of shame out of the store and moved on without another word, trying to tell myself ITS FINE, IT HAPPENS AND I AM NOT AN IDIOT, I JUST FORGOT.

I know from having some life experience now that I am not the only one who has ever done that. IT DOES HAPPENS AND THAT’S LIFE and yes I did go through the whole “Self Sabotage”.

“I am so stupid”

“Trust me for not having the right card, what a div”.

However I GOT OVER IT! and using empowerment and inspiration when it is just not your day “which we can often feel” when things are going wrong, can really help.

Learning to not beat yourself up over it, but acknowledge it, learn from it and talking about it, can help you get empowered and get inspired. you begin to find ways to,

OVERCOME THESE MOMENTS WHERE YOU WANT THE WORLD TO SWALLOW YOU UP OR GIVE UP ALL TOGETHER, TO CARRY ON!

There have been many things created that live on today, because someone had a bad day and wanted to share it through a son. The example that springs to mind is this one,

“THE ROAD TO HELL” BY CHRIS REA.

THIS SONG IS ABOUT THE M25 AND HE WROTE IT BECAUSE OF A NIGHTMARE HE HAD, HAD WHEN DRIVING ON THIS ROAD!

After my experience in the toy shop where I had forgotten the bank card I needed to pay for the items I had picked up, I did do the whole thing of avoiding the store for a few weeks afterwards. However when I did return the lady who had served me that day, wasn’t there and at the end of the day, as I often tell myself because it is true,

NO ONE GOT HURT AND I AM FINE!

When I feel low or not having the best of days, or I need to make changes to help me overcome bad luck or more deal with it, I will always find a way that will offer me empowerment and inspiration.

IF YOU FEEL ITS GETTING TO MUCH!

STOP, CLOSE YOUR EYES, BREATH AND JUST LISTEN TO YOUR HEART!

A technique I learned from a psychologist I did some training with to help with my anxiety.

I get empowered and inspired by a lot of people around me, not just friends and family, but complete strangers too. You’ll be surprised of who you can meet if you put your phone down and chatted to someone on a bus or train.

YOU CAN OFTEN FIND THESE PEOPLE WHEN TAKING PART IN FUNDRAISERS,GOING TO FESTIVALS OR FOLLOWING A SPORTS TEAM.

I, if you have followed my blogs on this post and my other sites will share videos, articles and books I have read, that have offered me empowerment and inspiration.

Check out this video (click on the header of this video below to watch) by MuchelleB that I watched today for some empowerment and inspiration. This lady does many videos that can help you lift your energy to get empowered and inspired.

20 Little Ways to Get Organised for 2020

When things aren’t going your way have a good look around and you’ll be amazed at what you can find that can stop you in your tracks and make you see that OKAY TODAY DIDN’T GO TO PLAN BUT I’M STILL HERE AND I WILL GET THROUGH IT WITHOUT FURTHER HICCUPS AND MOVE ON!

YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR DAY AROUND AND IGNORE THE NEGATIVITY IN YOUR HEAD!

Be ruthless with it and think “OKAY LIFE YOU WANT TO MESS ME WITH ME DO YOU” and this is why journalling, exercise or decluttering can help.

Image result for free funny cartoon images huge question mark

WHY?

You need those endorphin’s to rise to the service, which in turn makes you feel better and see things in a different light.

A girl who I work with shared how she deals with things at home when they get too much or things have gone wrong.

She will jump on her motor bike and go for a ride.

Now you may think “Well that is a bit reckless” being pissed off whilst controlling a vehicle, but once she has done that and concentrated on making sure she doesn’t get killed, because the key thing here,

FOCUS ON SOMETHING THAT MAKES YOU HAPPY, TAKES YOUR MIND OF BAD LUCK AND FOCUS ON SOMETHING ELSE AND EVENTUALLY THAT BAD DAY WILL GO AWAY.

Bad memories will often resurface themselves and can often catch you unawares, but if you follow the above, SNAP YOURSELF OUT OF IT, PERSEVERE WITH HAVING A GOOD DAY OR GETTING THINGS DONE, BE RUTHLESS AND CHANGE YOUR FOCUS ON SOMETHING ELSE THAT INSTANTLY ALTERS THE MIND, WILL STOP THAT FLASHBACK FROM BRINGING YOU DOWN, AND THIS WILL THEN HELP YOU TO ACKNOWLEDGE (very important because if you don’t the image will often increase in size and the memory will pull you in further making you feel even worse especially when something has gone wrong, or its just not a good day) but you can start to make sense of it and change how you feel about this image.

SHRINK IT DOWN IN SIZE AND CREATE A HAPPY PICTURE! A technique I got from a guy called Paul Mckenna. Basically you bring the bad memory up and then create a happy picture and you can physically if you are at home, get a picture from your photos you have kept that makes you happy. Then in your hand focus on that happy image, increase that in size and reduce the size of the bad image to the point it is so small and you can no longer see it.

A fantastic tip and can really work. GIVE IT A TRY!

Continuing on about this girl at work. Once she has finished riding around and focuses on riding her bike, she then feels so much better to continue on with her day.

EMPOWERMENT IN A NUTSHELL!

Getting to know this girl from work, as she is training to be a pilot has inspired and empowered me in many ways, because she knows what she wants, what she needs to do to get there and I can see from how she carries out her work and with her day, no matter how much is thrown at her, she will do it.

Life will throw you off course and knock you down, but its the old case scenario that was often said to me as a kid,

I hope this blog has empowered you and inspired you, and I know that with perseverance, being ruthless and using something else to focus and changing the picture, rather than going over the bad luck you feel, you will get the life you want and be a great success.

HAPPY BLOGMAS AND A MERRY WEEKEND!

If you have strategies of Using Empowerment and Inspiration when it just not your day, then please share below in the comments. I want us all to encourage each other to build success in our lives and have our own castles, if you get the pun.

All my blogs for Blogmas so far can be found in the links below:

https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.wordpress.com/

https://theparentingadventuresthebirthofmyson.wordpress.com

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

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PRACTICE GRATITUDE TO BE THANKFUL TO HELP BE MORE POSITIVE ABOUT CHRISTMAS!

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If you haven’t read my first blog of Blogmas then please check it out here below:

https://everydaylivingandlifestyle.wordpress.com/2019/12/01/the-first-blog-for-blogmas-make-your-own-advent-calendar-and-bring-romance-back-this-christmas/

If you haven’t seen my previous posts and don’t know what I am talking about when I say blogmas as most people would have heard of vlogmas via Youtube, well instead of doing videos every day up to Christmas as there is no way at the moment I could commit to that, I am blogging on one or more (depending on how it goes) on my websites everyday up to Christmas Day.

I have shared links to my other sites further down of this blog.

I don’t want my blogs to be all doom and gloom but there are people like myself at one point where Christmas was a time to dread rather then something to look forward too.

When my parents got divorced for example and I am going to do a blog on my parenting blog site: https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.wordpress.com/

It was a tough time of year and I for the first time I did dread it because knew that the Christmases I once knew were no longer going to be the same again.

To much was changing and like I heard one of my friends once say I felt like I had no control over what was happening and felt totally helpless, but then when my son came along it bought my spark back for Christmas again, because once you have kids you do start to see things from their eyes, and to them especially now because my son is starting become aware of Christmas it is a magical experience with all the sparkly decorations, visiting Santa in his grotto and going on Christmas trains. It’s just magical to them.

Also now I am a lot older and have had some life experience have come to see that there are some people and children not so lucky to have Christmas presents each year or experiences like my son has had, and there are still people on the streets out in the cold with no where to go or noone to see.

That has made me grow up a lot and to see that,

Christmas isn’t all about me

It’s about giving to others aswell and so each year I will donate money to a good cause at Christmas time and if I see someone selling the Big Issue I will buy it, if I have money on me or busking, or if I do see someone homeless give them a couple of quid.

Looking back even though at the time when my parents got divorced seemed tough, as I heard someone say “There is always someone worse off than you” and to build better relationships with others around you and to build a successful life is to be thankful for what you already have.

I still have a roof over my head, I have a husband who helps share responsibilities with me and have someone who loves me in the romantic and emotional way, I have a son who teaches me new things everyday, I have a massive family who I may not physically see all the time but still in contact with and so,

What do I have really to complain about?

I know what is like to be in the dark when you feel everything is falling around you, but you can by practicing gratitude to be more thankful to help be more positive about Christmas really does help.

Reading stories of people who had nothing and changed their lives around I find truly uplifting and see that no matter what is happening in your life you can make a change and that is something to be thankful for.

I will sit down now and go through what I am grateful for, it is a great source of medicine and a great habit which I talk a lot about on this site, see some of my posts below, to get into.

Creating more happiness into your life

Create empowerment into your life

My Daily Habits

Creating New habits

Life is about learning and we can learn so much from others around us and if you feel annoyed by people around you that bring you down because they are very negative build new relationships with other people who make you feel lifted each day and do teach you things you never knew and that can help make you feel better about Christmas and life in general too; and when you do find those people that is something to be grateful for.

So if you are having a hard time to adjust to Christmas because of heartache or you just feel so overwhelmed and want to hide away this Christmas look around you as you will be surprised at what there is still to be thankful for.

I will always mention it because it does really help,

KEEP A JOURNAL!

I hope you have a good week, and I will post again either on here or my other sites, see listed below:

https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.wordpress.com/

https://theparentingadventuresthebirthofmyson.wordpress.com

If you practice gratitude or you have any other tips on how to help people who are find Christmas time hard, be more positive about Christmas then please leave your comments below, I would love to hear from you.

Life is about sharing what really can help others and building a community that makes people feel good about life if they don’t feel that already!

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

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Celebrating Christmas by doing Blogmas

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This year I have decided that I would do Blogmas to help get me and everyone who reads or who are new to my blogs, in the mood for Christmas and so this means I will be posting blogs everyday from tomorrow (1st Dec) to Christmas Day (25th Dec) on my various sites that I write blogs on, including this one.

The links to my other sites are as follows:

https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.wordpress.com/

https://theparentingadventuresthebirthofmyson.wordpress.com

There may be some videos, articles, books and various topics that I would like to share as this time of year can be hard for some people and like myself there was a time when I dreaded Christmas.

However there are good things about Christmas too and will be sharing how you can finish this year with a bang by creating positive changes into your life that will set you up to have a better Christmas and finish the year on a high.

If there is a particular topic you would like me to talk about that will help you then please leave a suggestion by adding a comment below. You can keep up to date with all my blogs on this site and my others by following on WordPress.com.

You can also see my posts on Pinterest and my social media pages too:

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Have a great weekend,

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

Watch “MANIFESTING $1,000,000 WITH THE LAW OF ATTRACTION (IT WORKS)” on YouTube

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If you have ever read, listened or seen Tony Robbins talk about The Law Of Attraction then you will like this video by Sunny Lenarduzzi.

She explains how The Law of Attraction helped her manifest $1,000,000.

Coming up I will doing Blogmas starting this Sunday posting everyday up to Christmas day on one or more of my sites I share with this one, see links below.

If you have a topic you would like me to talk about on this site or my other ones then please leave a comment below.

You can follow me on this site to keep up to date with my posts on WordPress.com. Please see links to my other sites I regularly post on too:

https://www.carriesrealworld.com

https://everydaylivingandlifestyle.wordpress.com

https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.wordpress.com

https://theparentingadventuresthebirthofmyson.com

https://sportsandfitnesspassion.wordpress.com

Have a great weekend.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie x

Handling anxiety during Christmas and have a successful one

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First of all I have to recommend you watch some of the Mel Robbins videos about handling certain things that may happen leading up to Christmas. She did a recent one about never feeling guilty again and another about what not to talk about during Christmas and toxic family relatives. See these videos below.

Anxiety can creep up on you anywhere and can be caused by many things and can be triggered around this time of year, because of Christmas parties and seeing friends you don’t often see and family.

I love my family but there has been some feuds, example one of my Uncles who sadly isn’t with us anymore didn’t like the fact that we my mum (his sister) and my auntie (his other sister) were still in contact and friends with his ex-wife and when my mum and dad got divorced my dad couldn’t be in the same room as my mum and her new husband.

This can cause a strain because you do often have to dived yourself and often as I have been there, feel we have to lie about seeing the other person or not mention them in case it triggers that other person to start being very negative towards you and that other person.

At Christmas parties at work, there may be someone who is bullying you at work or you just don’t get along with and you are weary or fearful of them starting on you at the Christmas party.

My first tip is: Think about the people who you do look forward to seeing at Christmas or work with and focus on them, not on the person being negative. If there is a member of your family that doesn’t get along with someone else in your family then arrange to still see them but at different times. Example we often would spend Christmas day at my mums side of the family and boxing day with my dads side of the family. If this isn’t possible them why not spend time with them during the new year instead of Christmas.

Handling anxiety during Christmas is learning what causes it in the first place and so looking back and writing it down can help you find out what it truly is. This does mean digging deep but will help you manage these thoughts and come up with a solution. If it is about the food or if someone won’t like your gift then have a chat if you can with that person to find out what they would really like. Asking is often the best option and when it comes to food if someone offers to do it instead or help you, take them up on it and plan ahead, and go through the items that are worrying you first so you can help prevent the worries from happening.

To have a Successful Christmas isn’t about everything being perfect, sometimes the best memories are often when someone has gotten the wrong gift or spills salt into their dinner because the lid fell off the salt shaker. This would often happen at my Nan and Grandads at Christmas, yet it still makes me laugh and smile.

I gave my husband one year because I forgotten what it was I had bought and it was a year that we said we wouldn’t buy each other gifts but he did and so I then panicked and realised I had a gift. I thought it was a shaving kit, but turned out to be a car cleaning kit. Back then he didn’t have a car or licence but was very funny and he did see the funny side of it, and I did buy him another gift so technically he got two presents and it was fine.

If you are worried about drinking too much then don’t get into rounds and stick to buying your own drinks. This isn’t being tight or unsociable but saving yourself and them money, and you don’t have to worry about being pressured to have a alcoholic drink if you do not want one.

Worried about debt, save from January to December and even a little bit put aside can go a long way. Yes set a budget and check out Jordan Paige Youtube videos as she gives some great tips on how to save for the holidays.

So have a super Christmas, I will be posting more as we get nearer to the festive season, but until then have a super week and weekend.

Many thanks for reading.

Carrie X

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Creating more happiness into your life

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I remember reading somewhere some time ago that it is impossible to be happy so you shouldn’t try, but isn’t that the point of life?

Lets face it noone wants to walk around feeling miserable or that there is no purpose and most of the time when we feel like this, going on my own experience is because we want to be happy but feel stuck in a rut not sure what to do next or how to get out of feeling unhappy, to be happy.

This time of year it is very easy to feel down because the rain, the cold and the short daylight can have many implications on our mood, because there can be little daylight and sunlight. We can often become unwell due to colds and flu, which can effect our mood, so wanting to share some tips on creating more happiness into your life.

If you want to put your feet up and chill in front of the TV then do. Being a mum, which I share a lot about on my other two sites The Parenting Adventures Tips and Tricks and The Parenting adventures the birth of my son, (see links below) you can often be rushed off your feet with the school run, getting errands done, going to work and then its dinner time and be completely wiped out. So making time for yourself to me more so than ever, definitely if you are a parent, is to take some well earned time chilling with a cuppa and watching some good TV or like often my husband and I do once Henry is in bed will watch a film. We do this with Henry but when you have seen Polar Express or Peppa Pig for most of the days and weeks, as these are my son’s favourite thing to watch, you often just want that something different which is a bit more mature and the other thing is stop feeling guilty when you do have time to chill.
Create a wish list. They often say you should stop wish lists and take action, but often we forget and when it comes to the end of the year we often look back and think “We didn’t do that in the end, I wish I had, nevermind we’ll do it next year instead” then next year comes and again that wish didn’t happen. I live by lists and it is how I take action, get things done and its good to make a wish, plan it, book it, do it and its good to have things to look forward to and crossing my wish lists off is very satisfying indeed. As I see it a goal is a wish, you just have to make it happen and set a date like you would if you were to book your wedding for example and stick to it.
Write a book. When I told people that I had written a book many said “I would love to do that one day” and you can. I am not academic but the one lesson I have always loved is English and I love writing stories. If this is something you have wanted to do, then put pen to paper and write away. It can be whatever comes into your head, plan it out first if you wish, but once it is out on paper and you have developed a draft then you can fix it, edit and shape it out afterwards and let your imagination run riot, often the craziest of stories are often the best, example Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, they are stemmed from books and someone’s imagination. There is no real Hogwarts it was what was in J K Rowlings head, so don’t feel feared by your mind but enjoy it and be as crazy as you like.
Create a happiness ritual. So if candles are your thing, I find scented candles in particular in the Autumn and Winter and in the evenings very calming and soothing, and in turn makes me very happy. It can be that simple, just making something that calms the mind and makes you feel blessed rather than “Nothing makes me happy” then do it. When we feel blessed, relaxed, calm and at peace, this is creating happiness.
Cleaning and giving your home a makeover. When we see mess we can often feel overwhelmed, we want to hide away from it and feel that its always going to be this way. I have to say I do find even though as a child I hated it, find it very therapeutic, as once all the clutter is gone and the space is shining it is very, very fulfilling. Once done give yourself a well earned reward, such as a bath, read a book or some quality time watching some TV. Also you can have fun whilst cleaning and declutttering aswell, like create a simple display. We do it at Christmas, halloween, valentines day and Easter, so why not everyday, and you can use everyday things. See example below. Plus you can use this time to listen to an audiobook, a playlist on Youtube or a podcast.
This is my sons bedroom and an example of how you can create a simple display
Create yourself a meal. Can be your favourite one or one you have always wanted to make. If you are sick of eating meat for example and have wanted to make a vegetarian meal then give it a try. Learning a new skill can be very satisfying and once conquered you find out that you have a hidden talent for cooking all a long, even though you may have doubted yourself and that you can achieve anything once you put your mind to it.
Exercise. I love to keep fit as it does help me get going, and often in the week and at the weekends I will set my alarm extra early and get up to do a workout before my day begins. It really helps boost my energy and set me up for the day and often it isn’t for very long, but once it is done I feel awake and like “Yeah bring it on”. It doesn’t have to be for half hour or an hour. You do how long you want and increase the time or up the tempo as you go. Really there are no rules as such just make sure you wear comfortable clothing so when you sweat this doesn’t cause chafing and irritate your skin and do cool down and stretch afterwards, because once you sit down afterwards often your muscles and joints can become stiff. TRUST ME I’VE BEEN THERE!
Dreading the Christmas parties and putting on weight, getting drunk as skunk again, then my advice is don’t allow people to buy you a drink but stick to yourself. This may sound tight but often when we say we want a Coke or a glass of Lemonade instead of a Vodka and Lemonade you can get a look to say “WHAT Whats the matter with you?” and have “Oh go on its Christmas” and as I have often done when I was younger I would say “Oh go on then just the one” then afterwards once I lost count of how many drinks I had, being put in a cab prepaid and completely wrecked, regretting what I did the night before and feeling dreadful the next day. If someone offers you a drink just say politely “No thank you I’m going to stick with myself tonight” and then you can buy a drink without the pressure and often buying rounds is very costly. If it is a free bar go and get a drink before anyone offers to get you one. Easy said then done, here’s a tactic. When your glass is almost done, make out you need the toilet then on your way back pick up a drink and then you have one before someone sees you and gets you one instead that is non-alcoholic. Another tip with food, eat before you get there and then you have less chance of nibbling that party food.
Read a book about being happy. I remember being recommended by a friend a book and I wish I could remember what it was actually called because it was a really good book, and it really helped. It told you about feeling guilty when we say no to something if you for example can’t meet a friend for lunch or go on a night out because you are just too tired, and often we can feel guilty and then feel bad and unhappy with ourselves and it explained that if they take it badly its their problem not being mean, but its true and that often we say Yes to not make that person feel bad knowing we aren’t going to enjoy ourselves because we are too tired. It just hit the “nail on the head”. There are many books out there, I often get mine from either Amazon, buy it on Audible, the library or I check out a charity shop.
Find new people in your life. I have come across many people through my life and many have made me laugh out loud and just make me smile,and look forward to seeing them again, and others that have made me feel miserable and dislike the world. Let me ask you, do you want to spend time with someone who makes you feel hate or one that makes you feel life is worth living? I know which one I choose. If there are people in your life dragging you down and feeling very negative, complaining about everything and bitching about people who you actually like as often there are unfortunately people who will try and turn you against other people then GET THEM OUT OF YOUR LIFE!

Happiness does exist and sometimes it can be hard to find, but once you do, your faith in people will come back as often we can lose faith, and your faith life will come back too.

I would love to hear of how you stay happy or what has helped create more happiness into your life aswell. You can leave a comment below.

To be kept up to date with all my blogs on this site, you can follow me on WordPress.com and please check out these sites where I also post regularly on those too:

https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.wordpress.com/

https://theparentingadventuresthebirthofmyson.wordpress.com

I wish you all a very good rest of the week and I will post again next week.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

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30 Powerful habits, carriesrealworld.com, Create good habits instead, Everyone's perception of the word perfect is different, everyonecanbuildacastle, Get to love your imperfections, Never Try to Be Perfect

Never Try to Be Perfect/ Create good habits instead

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I read an article a long time ago, whilst waiting to be seen by my dentist which has stayed in my mind. It was about how this woman who wrote the article was striving to be perfect, have the perfect body, eat the perfect diet, etc yet she felt completely miserable, and didn’t get any real benefit from it what so ever.

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Yes she was losing weight but instead of feeling like “Yeah I feel great” she felt tired, hungry and had little motivation.

The one of things that stood out of me in this article was when she wrote that, everyone’s perception of the word “perfect” is different, and that’s the same for me as far as I am concerned when it comes to the word success.

I was so insecure at an early age that the way I looked and felt really bought me down, and I would avoid mirrors, hate trying on clothes in a fitting room, because lets face it, they aren’t the most flattering of mirrors in some changing rooms, and at school there was a girl called Sherie who seemed to be beautiful, hair, face, height and nice and slim. She was very popular and everyone wanted to be friends with her.

I would dream constantly about being this girl and what it would be like for a day, and what it would be like to be that pretty and that popular. However looking back she wasn’t super confident really, when she first began at school as she started a little after I began school, yet we were in the same class, she cried for a whole day because she missed her mum,

She was the sort of person that constantly had to have people around her, yet looking back I liked the fact I got a bit of space. I did eventually make friends and she became my friend, and I would go to Sherie’s flat for tea after school, but I didn’t need constant attention by loads of people.

At the time I thought she was the most perfect girl in the world, but in fact she wasn’t. I remember coming home from secondary school seeing her coming home on the bus and causing a bit of trouble with the bus driver with some other kids.

She by any means was perfect. NO ONE IN THIS WORLD IS PERFECT!

Life isn’t about being perfect but thriving in life, creating good habits that will fulfill your wellbeing and aiming to be successful in what ever field or path you choose.

Check out these 30 Powerful Habits which will make your life more productive and will help you build a better life for yourself, which in turns helps build your wellbeing and creating more successes in your life.

What you need to understand is the word perfect is like the word diet, there is so many different types that make you believe that if you follow this diet, you can look like this or look like that celebrity, but it isn’t real. No one in the world is the same, but if there is someone who you admire than learn from them to help implement changes to what they do to feel better about themselves that you could use, but never copy because what works for one person doesn’t mean it will work for someone else.

Be your own person and get to love your imperfections. Seeing peoples imperfections is to me more endearing because they are just being who they are, and not bothered about the word perfect.

So aim high, created positive changes but never try to be perfect because as far as I am concerned there is no such thing.

Thank you to those who have given me such wonderful feedback on my blogs so far, on this site and for those who have been reading and enjoying them. Let me know what the word perfect means to you, and how you try not to be perfect. You can leave a comment below.

You can keep up to date with all my blogs on this site, by following me on WordPress.com and I also write on these sites too:

https://everyonecanbuildacastle.com/

https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.wordpress.com/

https://theparentingadventuresthebirthofmyson.wordpress.com

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

P.S: You can check out my Pinterest and social media sites below too:

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Build the love, Build your knowledge, Confidence Boosters, Create empowerment into your life, empowerment, Have a vision, Practice Gratitude

Create empowerment into your life

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When we feel low we can often feel like we can accomplish nothing, and “what is the point?” Then a song comes on the radio, and often it is one going on my own experience, one that I haven’t heard for a while but love, and it’s like it speaks to you, and suddenly you feel like “You can take on the world today”. That’s empowerment.

It can happen anywhere and can be anything. When we see people running and we haven’t done any exercise for a bit or we read a story in the newspaper of someone who had lost everything and had to start again, then rebuilt their life and now living the life they had always wanted, making us feel “Well if they did it so can I”. That’s empowerment.

Creating more empowerment into your life can get you out of feeling like there is no point to life and can make you take action to have more.

Here are 6 tips of how to Create empowerment into your life:

Build the love: Last week I shared wrote a blog called, We should love more/A lesson for us all #truelove because part of building success in your life to have the life you want, is to build relationships with those around you. I have learned a lot from my husband and he did sweep me off my feet and it made me see that I can create a life for myself. I hadn’t found what I wanted in London so I moved away and found it unplanned as I moved for career ambitions too and there he was
Confidence Boosters: Can be anything or anyone. When talking to a girl I had been working with, turned around and said to me “You have a lot going for you” It made me realise I did. Not being big-headed, but sometimes we often don’t see what we already got that can give us confidence. I was doing well in the job I was doing, achieving goals and getting good feedback from my Managers so I did have the confidence there just didn’t always see it
Practice gratitude: Following on from confidence boosters, but to create empowerment we do need to look at what we already have and got in our lives that is good. What you enjoy/ What makes you laugh? Who do you want to see that would create more happiness in your life? What are you thankful for?
Give to others: Taking on the Great North Run was the biggest thing apart from getting married and having a son, I had ever done in my life. I never thought in a million years that I would have ever had done that…but I did. I wanted to raise money for the National Autistic Society because one of my mum’s friends had a son with Autism and was having a real tough time. This also follows on from “Build the love” because to receive love we do have to give it and to give it those who do need it the most and making a difference to other peoples lives, doing something you would never have dream of, whatever it may be is the most empowering thing you can do.
Build your knowledge: Learning about food when I decided to change my diet because I had put on weight really changed my association with food. I had, had an eating disorder and would feel guilty often when eating, but educating myself of what the body needs and what makes you happy, but healthy has made a huge difference. I don’t feel so guilty anymore and eat because I love the food, and it was interesting to learn what can really help with mood, gives you clearer skin and stops those belly aches and bloating. Learning a new skill or something that will enhance your mind and your wellbeing, can you empower you for more
Have a vision: I am one for goal setting. My husband is too, but he will see it as just a necessity but for me it is more than that. Often it is a life change to help me feel good about myself and build better relationships with those around me. My husband who I do admire so much, one the reasons I fell in love with him, was because when he sets his mind on something he will go for it, and do it. Example he wanted to learn to drive. He did, he wasn’t like me who often has so many different things I wish to do, but he had one vision in his mind, and he did his lessons never cancelled, passed his theory, first time and took his test twice, passing on the second time. Create a vision, a goal or a focus, Plan how you are going to do it in your head or in your mind, take action and go for it.

I love being empowered and as I often do live my life through music, it is often a song, but has been a magazine article, a Youtube video or a TV program, but as said it can be anything. It’s whatever gives you that boost that you can do anything once you have your mind set.

Never feel you should hold back, and always believe in yourself.

Please let me know what empowers you and has helped you create success in your life? I love hearing from other people so please share. You can leave a comment below.

You can keep up to date on all my blogs by following me on WordPress.com and I also write on these sites aswell:

https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.wordpress.com/

https://theparentingadventuresthebirthofmyson.wordpress.com

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

P.S: I am also on Pinterest and social media, please check out my pages below:

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free courses, hello yellow, Keeping a journal, Looking after your mind, making those changes, Mental Health, mental health day 2019, self care, surrey and border partnership, world mental health day

Looking after your mind #mentalhealthday2019

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Yes it is #mentalhealthday2019 and so I thought I would write a blog about Looking after your mind, as our minds are power machines and a lot goes on in them.

Looking after your mind is critical in helping you to be the powerful person you have always wanted to be, but sometimes our minds can work against us, if we aren’t careful, and so we have to learn to reprogram them to look at our lives differently, with our thoughts and fears.

So how do you do that?

I have discovered through having an eating disorder, having social anxiety, general anxiety and depression that you need focus on what you can do to make a difference.

I watched a video by Mel Robbins, called How To Find Your Passion #CoffeeTalk

She explains that passion isn’t in an object, a person or a job, for example, but it is within yourself, and it is energy.

What gets you excited to get up in the morning?

So stop searching for things that aren’t there, but things that are, and go through what brings a smile to your face.

I keep talking on this site about #keepingajournal, and the reason for that is because it is a great way to brain dump all your thoughts and fears, and then find out and get to grips with:

Why you are having those feelings?
What are the triggers?
What can I do today that would help me feel better

– Practice #selfcare example, take a bath, get your hair done, create a gratitude journal and write about all the things you do like about yourself, put some make up on or just chill and relax,watching reality TV if that’s what you like or soaps.

– Create a mood board and use your planner to keep track of how you feel each day and make a list of everything that would help you feel better that day.

– Do something new or learn something. If there is something you have wanted to learn about then now is the time to do that, as there are so many free courses out there.

It is all about making those changes to help stabilize your mind and whenever you feel low or afraid, do talk to someone because there are people who will listen.

I have been getting help from Surrey and Borders Partnership, which is #mentalhealth support you can get from the NHS, as my anxiety got so bad I ended up in hospital. I was having heart palpitations and thought that someone was after me.

It was horrendous and would never want anyone to go through that, and is why I support #mentalhealthcharities. I got help and so can you.

They will go on your terms not on theirs. So do get support if you feel that you can’t take life anymore or life is getting too much, because it can. Life can be a juggling act and can affect the mind, and so it is important for ourselves and our love ones who often are affected by someone with mental illness too, to get support and help.

Never feel alone if you have mental health problems, because you are not.

My son’s school raised money for the #helloyellow which supports young people with mental health. They had all the children wear something yellow to support #worldmentalhealthday.

When it comes to mental health it can affect anyone no matter who they are, so it is good that now we are making everyone aware of it, and that people are now getting support.

I post on this blog on a weekly basis and to keep up to date with my blogs then you can do so my following me on WordPress.com. If you have struggled with mental illness and you came out of it, then please tell me your story, I would really like to hear from you. Please leave a comment below.

I also share blogs on these sites to:

https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.wordpress.com/

https://theparentingadventuresthebirthofmyson.wordpress.com

https://www.facebook.com/carriesrealworld/?ref=bookmarks

I hope this has helped you should you be struggling with mental health and get support.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

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