Welcome it is time for my AUTUMN RESET and been so looking forward to it.
It is time to get those projects finished, setting up for the next season and taking time out.
I won’t be vlogging my reset and focus on my other two Channels, which is part of what I want to do for this Autumn reset. I will do have vlogs to upload from Summer and then I will be taking a month off once those vlogs go out.
I do have a printable. It is free to download and print and to help you if you want to join me in this RESET.
I will working on a Book I am writing, completing my Son and I’s room and doing a declutter and been doing this during the summer but want to complete it and have more space.
Does your past making you feel ashamed? In my life I have not always been kind and had dark thoughts, but I know that this has made me put them to bed as thoughts are what they are and didn’t carry out anything that would have been harmful and often it just I quick thought, in the moment because if I didn’t say anything and been able to see the lighter side of life.
My brother and I never got on as kids. We would argue and fight a lot, but now we are fine. If you constantly feel shameful then what specifically is making you feel that way?
I thought I was being unkind to a girl I work with and apologised and she didn’t have any ideas as to what I was talking about. So, I know longer felt shame and so talk. Let people know how you feel and speak to a psychologist, therapist or a Social Worker, if your thoughts of the past are haunting you and was as bad as what you thought?
Stop giving yourself such a hard time. Everyone has a past. Done the wrong thing or said something that was taken out of context. I remember when working in a Call Centre, one of the new people I spoke to I couldn’t see there face. I thought it was a man. I was chatting about it in the Staff Canteen and she comes over and says “Apparently I sound like a man” and she thought one of us (chatting to some of colleagues) called her a Cow, which we did not and she wanted to hit me, in particular. I felt dreadful and she spoke to one of the managers and I told it was an innocent conversation, and said I am sorry and I did feel ashamed, but it didn’t stop me from talking it made me be more self aware and next time I should have introduced myself and asked who the person was as I not met them and I not into gossiping.
In the end this was resolved she didn’t hit me, I didn’t keep on and the issue was solved, ,so I moved on.
Thinking of the past can drain you and be full of regret and not able to move on, but time has a different idea. Do you want to be happy with who you are? Take it one day at a time and address your feelings. I was so sad when my Nan died. She was my last grandparent and kept forgetting and would have dreams about her still being alive and it really changed a lot. I had a friend who lived by her and so whenever I could would pop in, I did. Suddenly I couldn’t do that anymore.
She would not want me, to not get on my my life. She lived to old age and it was her time.
My parents was getting divorced, I was in a very demanding job, but loved the social life. I then changed jobs but I hated it and it was the wrong move. I then decided I would follow my gut and had to be selfish and do what I felt would lead me to following my dreams. It lead me to a job where, it was a culture shock and what I needed and no longer regret the decisions I made and did what I was hopefully lead me to building a life of my own and it happened.
You never know what path to choose sometimes. It makes me think of a game of chess. What is the right move? Will I need to move my Queen or not? Reflect, write and leave it there. Take a step forward and trust your gut.
When I look back on events now, I loved the people met, good and bad. I like the journeys I have taken and will keep living and not feel ashamed. It happened, noone died so it is time to let the shame go and create more abundance and self belief.
I had a real tough time letting go of what went before. I still remember how I felt when playing in the Estate I lived, when we were running to a car and back, the girl who’s parents who owned the car told me off, even though there was others doing the same and the parent even went to see my mum, has bothered me.
Can I change what happened? Of course, no and I still remember how I felt. It made me avoid playing on the Estate and wished I had spoken up for myself. I wonder if the girl who told her mum, is thinking about that time? Probably forgotten and so now, does it even matter?
No one can turn back time, no matter how many times we watch The Time Travelers Wife or Doctor Who. If I could choose a time to go back to, it wouldn’t be that incident with that girls parents car, but to the 60’s and visiting the Kings Road.
I’d love to be around for the Coronation of Queen Elizabeth 2nd and see Elvis Presley and the Beatles.
When I was a school the girls in my class at Primary school, ripped up my cards I gave to them for Christmas. I was alerted by it, when playing in the other playground, but I wasn’t angry, I was like “ok, so what?”. I didn’t react and suddenly they all started crying. I wonder if they remember?
So when I look back now i think of the lessons I have learned. I think of now and bless each day I live. We have all made mistakes and things like someone passing, can affect us, but I know my grandparents would not want me to be sad. They would have picked me up and told me to move on.
Change is hard and there are people who are set in their ways, but life will change, it is part of it, as looking back, I can’t amend it and people move on, met other people who they now want in their life.
People grow, give birth to form a different generation and it doesn’t mean they have forgotten about you and focused on the time you took their toy in nursery, but what you say to them now and the one thing I like is to be keep in contact with old school friends and on the good times and sending messages when it is their birthday. What do you want to focus on and learned? How can you deal with the times that burdened you from the past? Journal, chat with them and often the arguments you had, have been forgotten and now you can laugh back it, rather than beating yourself up, about it.
Living in the present tense is how I have overcome the past battles. The things that haunted me, are flowing away and a I am more awake. I have let the girl who used to cry a lot, because my time with friends has come to end for the day, who got hit by other kids, got called names and think well I am here now and I love my son and family and not vision of the life I didn’t have. The girl who day dreamed all day and stayed in my room afraid to go out and love being out. The past is exactly what it is and I found that I have become wiser and strong minded. I am glad that I didn’t react to those girls that tore up my cards. Often kids who do things like that, probably wanted a different kind of reaction, which they didn’t get and a friend I made, when following a sports team said “They felt guilty” because after that time, they didn’t do it again.
I have been a bit of a twat, as French Saunders one woman show is about. I was a girl who wore a Liverpool FC cap, a Chelsea Plastic Bag and a Tottenham Scarf and was called a twat by a steward and to some they would have wanted to ground to pull them down, but I didn’t, I felt proud and why should I support more than one football team?
In the end there is one team for me, but do like to also support other local clubs and love going to see a football match and as it is down the road from where I live in Wimbledon, go to see AFC Wimbledon. I even been to see Leatherhead team play.
I would like to take this opportunity for those that have read my blogs for this years Summer Project. I have one more blog to write and then it will be my Autumn Reset.
If you’d like to be alerted when I post on this site then please subscribe and if you have any further advise on dealing with the Past, then please share. There is a comment box below.
Originally when I wrote this down it was about Body Image, but I now realise it is not just about that. It is all to do with how you treat yourself. This is not treating yourself with a box of chocolates, I mean being verbally kind to yourself and in your mind.
I am in a good place now. I have changed my thoughts of myself and my life in general. There are times in the mornings where I see my hair is all messy, I see unwanted hair growth but also, my room or home is chaotic and have no sense of, Is this it. Is this what my life looks like?
I have just come back from Wimbledon with my mum and step dad and I have case full of clothes, bag full of my notebooks and journals and I have believe it or not I did a declutter. So I am working on it. I will spend time tidying, unpacking and know I can get it back into shipshape.
This is free to download. It is reprogramming your thought patterns. I now make sure I read each day, because it slows me down and feel calm in the mornings now. I will have breakfast and go for morning walk. I do a bit of writing each day. These have really helped with stress and anxiety.
What one thing do you want to change in the mornings?
Write down in the printable or notebook of What is the first thing you in the morning. It used to be, for me get up, watch Youtube and before getting my son ready for school and it became a habit that would not help my day, because I would be lazy. It should have been to get my son ready for school. My son was close by, but had to get my priorities right and me and my husband would argue, because of it and if it were the other way around, I wouldn’t have been happy.
There was a time where I would come home angry. I was working in a Call Center, where people would call in, not happy, because I worked as a technical advisor/call agent and would go home and would bring what happened each day, home.
So are you have a lot of arguments?
Is a job, sleep or a relationship?
Is the food that you eat?
It is making sense of it all and creating a picture of yourself and your life and what do you want out of life?
Who do you spend time with?
I make sure that my son is okay and say good morning to him, have breakfast together, read and make sure my bed and his, is made and that my life is functional and do the things in my life that will help me grow and everyone in my life grow. Checking in on them and make the effort to have a good day, facing challenges but not making them stop me, from living.
Not having too many commitments, but that I have some social interaction and my son does too. I like to have a day off from everything and last Tuesday had a proper lazy day. I still worked on some content but stayed in and it felt so good.
I wish you all the happiness in the world. Life can be joyous and the image of it. Feel good about yourself. I write another google blog site, called Building Self Confidence – The Ugly Duckling: https://buildingselfconfidencetud.blogspot.com/
I really hope you find my Life Coaching Programme helpful and please give me your feedback and what would like to see in my next one.
What is coming up?
My Autumn Reset. Where I will be working on various areas and getting ready for the new season.
Hello! So it is that time again. I am sharing my monthly Newsletter for August 2025. I am sharing what I have been doing so far in the Summer Holidays and what is coming up within my content. And before that, Just to let you know, my book Mum&Me book 1, is available to for you to read. It is available in Kindle and Paperback: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0BGSS7H9K
It is August 2025 and the last month of this years Summer Project and the it is my Autumn Reset programme and so more to come.
In this blog I talk about How Life Is Full of Lessons.
Shouting: I have found by shouting has made matters worse when my son wouldn’t eat his food and one work place, there was a manager who screamed and shouted a lot and it just made you want to pack your bags and go. I am not saying that I am perfect, it can be the first thing you do but it has made matters worse. Go into another room, stay calm and with my son now, giving him two choices, as soon as I feel like shouting I will take breath and say “You got two choices and if you do not choose I will choose for you. Check out his video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQs5l6ojlOI&list=PL0AyektQNGDGF_ms_qIrBILXsIM_rTjp_&index=6 I give into my son when he begins to get annoyed and have a tantrum but you can’t please your kids all the time and staying calm and not shouting, has better results in your child see getting angry and kicking off leads to me make the choice and take my seriously. In shouting my son would laugh and it really got to me. Now I have stopped myself, it has had a better reaction.
Switch off: One Saturday I was seated on the sofa and every five minutes I was looking at my phone. This was driving me mad and so now I don’t have my phone always near me. I am not always on laptop and found sometimes, to do bits in silence. Like writing, cooking and having a drink.
Being out of debt: It feels so good not to be in debt. I do have a Youtube Channel dedicated to money. https://www.youtube.com/@financialliving I needed to rebuild my relationship with money. My spending was getting out of hand. I did have store cards, catalogue Accounts, overdrafts and an Amazon credit card. I was doing buy now pay later. Now out of debt my life has changed financially and monitor what comes in and what goes out. It feels so good to not to have so much “Money Stress” I call it and I do no spend days and use what I got.
Feeling defeated: Began Park run this year and it was good but wasn’t enjoying it. I was getting self conscious about being last. Since then I have been doing walks with my son, walking in the mornings when he was at school and this week did 30,000 steps. Now I feel ready to go back to doing Park run and even run part of it.
So what have you learned. What is now good in your life and how did you go about improving the way you feel about yourself and your life. Please leave a comment below. It is good to see your life changing for the better by what we have learned about areas in our lives.
I have not always been happy with life. I would put myself down and it became a habit.
This was along with being bad with money. As a kid I was very good with saving and then I started earning and working in Camden I would splurge and would be reckless. I ended up in debt by spending money that wasn’t mine and what I didn’t have, avoiding my bank account and now thankfully being 46 saving again and be cautious.
Living badly can have long lasting effects and falling further down a hole and not sure what to do. I would be so self critical. it got on my nerves and wanted to feel good. I felt I was fat, got easily upset and alone. I never felt part of anything as a child and really wanted to fit in but it seemed impossible.
I never made my bed, I was untidy and was addicted to crisps. When I first lived away from home, I would wait until I had no clothes left to wash my clothes, never ate breakfast and just wasn’t respecting myself and my life.
It is hard to be happy all the time but I know how to manage my feelings and emotions now and I got help. I was in a mental health hospital and this helped me get back on my feet. I make sure I sleep well, I have things to look forward to and becoming a mum I didn’t want my son to be affected by my thoughts and feelings and he has his moments of not dong the right thing, but to me that is part of the process of being a child. I want my son to know what is right and what is wrong. Also express himself. I will say now if I am unhappy but not getting angry, but by chatting rather than it be an heated argument.
I will be honest if I don’t know something and feel comfortable in doing so. I will ask myself questions to challenge the critical mind such as “No” when I get anxious about going out and What My focus is. This has really helped. It has slowed me down. I remember a colleague called me “Mrs. Rush Rush” because I would speed around the call floor and a colleague when working at a holiday camp asked me, why I was always rushing and it was a habit. I think part of it was living in the city and following others.
So I take my time now and give myself plenty of time to get ready for the day, have a cup of tea and read. I will make my bed now and make sure my son and I have breakfast and plan ahead.
I look after my body. My nutrition needs a bit of work but doing this a bit at a time, by eating different things, like I will have a yogurt, cereal or toast and not deprive myself, but insuring I do eat some fruit and vegetables and that I take care of my skin and journaling a lot, addressing issues and challenges but keeping a good open mind, allowing myself to think things through and having days away from my laptop and cleaning, tidying. I love taking my son out and playing sports and just living a good happier life. I set myself goals, I do workout and active. I walk a lot and do weights and other exercises and just listen to my mind and body.
Habits are not just a one time thing but something that grows into being good and get rid as you grow, the bad.
I hope you enjoy my blogs and what habits have you changed? Please leave a comment below.
Hello it is the first full week of the School Summer Holidays for my son. We have been doing some walks and bus and trains rides. This lead me to write this weeks Cheat Sheet, Fitting Exercise around your kids.
I post them every week and are free to download and print:
I like to Plan a lot. It is something I have naturally done and was bread in me. People think because you are planning, that your organised. That is not the case. Its because I am disorganized I plan, I have forgotten when my son has had own clothes day, when he was doing a show at Christmas and not ordered his lunches for school, as he has school dinners, so I see it as a tool but also, a fun exercise.
I keep a written diary and use a Calendar on Notion and google Calendar and make sure I check my emails daily. It is good to have a nice diary or planner as it can feel like a chore but it doesn’t have to be.
I love journaling too and I like to design them so I can flick through and to remind myself of the main things I want to focus on.
I like using photos, images on line to create vision boards along with Pinterest and Canva, and mind maps.
It is great to get your kids involved too and designing and being creative.
Have a Family Planner that your kids can design and write on. Having a List for your children to complete where they can add stickers too once they have completed a task, adding a treat once they have done four things on their list.
I have a writing journal as love to write books, a daily one, gratitude journal and cooking.
You can create your own stickers and cut out words from a newspaper or magazine and books. I have been cutting out notes on my notebooks into my journal. I like to use colouring pens and washi tapes along with labels.
You can be a inventive as you like and can take no more than 10 minutes.
Please check out my Newsletter for July 2025 and talk about what I will be doing as my son is finishing this week for the Summer Holidays. I have been watching Live AID celebrating its 40 years and was hard to see Bob Geldof cry when watching documentary of the songs in the US and the UK and what lengths he had to go through to help those dying in Ethiopia.
Wimbledon Tennis, seeing Billy Idol and seeing The Rocky Horror show with Jason Donovan at Wimbledon Theatre.
Everyone can build a castle 