Hello! So come on, be honest. How stressed do you feel?
I am a little, because I have to wrap and sort out a few more gifts and when it comes to wrapping I am not a lover of.
Do I need to say sorry? I find it causes me to pretend that I am busy doing something else. However I am not cooking the Christmas dinner thank the lord. My husband takes care of that whilst I take charge when it comes to breakfast and putting my son Gifts together, along with my nieces and tomorrow we plan to get up at 5am to go to ASDAS at 6am to get some last bits.
AT LEAST I GET A LIE IN ON CHRISTMAS DAY!
So not all bad. This Cheat sheet is giving tips on What to do to Delegate BEFORE Christmas Day so everyone involved is in fact involved. So here it is:
In the year the Two Thousand for the first time I dreaded Christmas. My family life had changed, my Nan passed away and I was in a job I hated. It was a fail. I had to re-address my life and where it was going.
Our Elf on A shelf
For some, there are people, like that year who dread Christmas. When a change happens, all those good times feel like they have stopped and can make you feel like you want the world to swallow you up, to never be seen again. It took me a while to adjust and I made the decision to leave my life in Richmond behind to move to work in the South Coast.
When I moved Christmases were a work day. I moved to work at a holiday camp and where I met my husband and so I had the Christmas my boyfriend, then at one of our friends house and it was fun working at Christmas. Within in one year, I stayed with then my boyfriend and worked with a hangover but I do not regret as it, it was so much fun.
I lost my spark for the festive cheer. I was sad. My nan was the center of my universe and my Grandad and my Nan, made the Festive season the best ones and it struck me that those times were gone and I asked, “Would Christmas be good again?”
I see the Christmas as a day a of rest and recuperation now. I love that my son loves it and he has helped bring back my Christmas spirit, to feeling happy again, we hosted Christmas once with my in-laws. Now though it is just the three of us and celebrate for him now and he has helped me bring back my joy for #Christmas.
I am not a fan of the busyness of the Christmas so tend to buy online but do like to have a traditional drinks, decor an like a Mulled Wine or a Winter Cider and may have a glass of wine. I love a festive coffee. This year 2025 its the nutcracker latte, iced or hot. What is your festive drink this year? For a while it was the Blackforest Gateaux Hot Chocolate.
If you’ve not had a good year then it can be hard to enjoy Christmas but do something different and if you want to eat out as many restaurants or pubs can be open. The year before Henry was born we, my husband I went to Florida which was good fun and next year I plan to go to Scotland and today we are off to Kingston if the weather is okay and see the lights and see if we can get any decor or my sons bedroom.
The other thing is family break ups. Alternate visits. One year let your kids be with their dad and the next with you. It was hard when my parent divorced but my dad would go to my brothers and so it can work out and just say “Your not gonna choose” but will see them what day works for you and if they are persistent then say “No this is what is going to work with me” and if they make it hard for you then you have to be honest with them and be stern with the decision you have made.
It is not the time for arguments. It is the time to end family feuds and just enjoy it.
So going to pop out as I need something for my teeth they’ve been hurting me a lot and have a Christmas coffee and a pastry of some kind. Sometimes you just need that lift and it helps me think and feel lucky to have experience Christmases with those gone and that Christmas is now worth celebrating.
It is coming close to the season of cheer and joy, but for some it can be the worst time of the year if they have experienced trauma or a loss of someone. This can affect our feelings. When my spark had gone for Christmas it made me feel that I couldn’t wait for it be over. I felt under pressure because of my gift will not be good enough and how much I pay matters, but now I know that is not true.
Now I love it and the birth of my son has helped and loves it and it taking it step by step. I wrote a long time ago about changing traditions: Creating new traditions So I go for a walk, prep for dinner or my husband does that and just chill.
So now any celebration I acknowledge it and set into play good days out, seeing family and going for a drink (remember safety) can help with creating memories that my son can cherish and the tables turn when you have kids, like when my Grandad died (my mums dad), she’d come to us for Christmas dinner rather than her cook, we then went back over to hers when she was in Sheltered Housing, being elderly so couldn’t go we went to hers so she wasn’t on her own and that we still celebrated as a family.
It is time take it easy and not allow it to beat you over the head of can’t afford it because we think the more expensive it is the more reassured that our family or friends know you love them and we get into debt which causes you to fear it. Your presents and time is enough and not about causing guilt or anxiety because you have lack of funds and if you need support than ask. Going to the Food Bank is not to make you devalued but is about getting support so you can still celebrate Christmas and I feel strongly that we shouldn’t have family needing to go to a foodbanks because all families should be given support by our government and reducing cost and Foodbank isn’t a dirty word and there is no price tag when it comes to love.
I each month now I give to the local Foodbank to help families. This is not an ad, but how I feel about the world and love to give and we should all be helping each other so we can have happiness and enjoy the festive season.
In the year 1999 my world appeared to crumble in front of me as it was the first Christmas that not all the family were their celebrate, as my mum and dad had split up for good this time, and was getting divorced, my brother and I fights got worse that we both would hit out at one another as soon as we saw each other and not long after that Christmas my nan died, (my mums mum).
I knew it was going to be different when earlier in the year of 1999 my mum told me whilst driving to North End road, but I was some what prepared because I saw it was going to happen a long time before then, and said “Yes I know, I had a feeling that was coming”, but I did end up spending a lot of time out, not wanting to face the music of it.
The reality of it was stronger than the thought of it, and I didn’t want to be involved, but I was, because as soon as it happened my dad would be very angry saying some very nasty things to me, about my mum, like I hope she dies of cancer and if I see her again, I’ll stab her and my mum then would say, Your dad cheated on me, she moved us to North Sheen, near Richmond, because my dad kicking off because of the nose of our neighbours living in our block and it was just being between a tug of war.
I am rewriting my book called, The Peabody Years, as it was quite small compared to what I wanted it to be and there is more I would like to add, but in the year of 1999 we had been living in our first houses in North Sheen since the year of 1996.
That year in 1999 was the first time I had ever dreaded Christmas and wanted it to go away. I had gone into a depression that I can not describe, and found it hard to even get out of bed.
I had changed jobs and was not happy at all. I hated where I was working and resigned as we got closer to the festive season. The spark I had for the Christmas had gone and I thought it would never return, and I was getting drunk a lot before then, and finally I came out of it after the new year, after reading a book by Paul McKenna, called, “I can make you confident in 7 days” and it was what I needed and yes it helped me immensely.
I was so used before this happened in 1999 used to traditional Christmases, where we would go to my nans house in Finborough Road Estate in Earls Court, and my grandad when he was alive, would cut the turkey, we’d open our gifts before dinner as my I or one of my cousins would help him hand out the gifts under my nans tree, and then after dinner my grandparents, my parents and my Aunty and Uncle would play a card game.
So when Christmas of 1999 approached I knew that those days were surely over and it hit my like a knife, that Christmases a I knew them would never happen again.
It did take a long time to get my spark for Christmas to come back, as I for a long while became a humbug, and saw it like any other day.
I hated the way I felt, and I had also begun to starve myself. Yes I had an eating disorder and it was when I passed out at my nans, I knew I had to turn my life around, as I was frightened of how much weight I lost. I lost strength in my arms, I had no energy to do anything and was constantly feeling guilty about everything I ate.
To not make this blog not too long, I did end up finding my spark again when I went to Florida one year and after my son was born.
I decided to also help bring back my spark for Christmas I needed to create a new set of Christmas traditions and that is I always like to do a Christmas run or long walk each year, and on boxing day too. Another one, is I like to decorate for the Christmas cheer whilst playing Christmas songs, and go to a Christmas market, and borough market in London, and have a cup of Mulled Wine or Winter cider.
My sons first Christmas being a mum was different too, as Henry was born unexpectantly premature and again I didn’t think much about it, but from his next Christmas I wanted it to be magical for him, like it was when I was a kid, and want to continue to do so, for when I have more children.
If you have had a familiar experience around Christmas time I would love to hear your story. You can leave a comment below.
Also if you are new to my blogs then you may not know that I like to raise money this time of year, for one of my charities I like to support, and this year I am raising money for a Charity called Tommy’s who raise money to support families whom have had stillbirths and premature births. My Just Giving page is link below if you would like to make a donation:
Everyone can build a castle 