I am a little sad this week because of a Comedian called Duncan Norvellle died this week and I saw him live in Blackpool one summer season with Frank Carson and wish that some people would live for ever because people like Duncan, comedy has always helped me through the down days which I can often feel during Winter.

Having little day light can bring on the loss you feel and like my family members gone, because it’s so final, but tell myself that I will see them again. Many may not believe they will and that is fine, but for me it brings me peace and not fear death. Sorry if this is morbid. You don’t have to continue reading this blog if you feel uncomfortable about it, because death is a tricky subject and when that person has gone you can feel guilty in celebrating Christmas, knowing that they will no longer be there and losing them, can feel so strong because of their absence.

Keep with traditions. This can be a good way to help make them feel that they are still with you via keeping with the traditions that person had at Christmas time. Like having a tipple that person had had, when Bobby Ball died, who was part of a double act I loved, Cannon and Ball, held a gala and put out Bobby Ball’s shoes and his red braces on a chair.

Have your guests help you if they can raise funds for a charity. This can provide support to you if you have lost someone from a Stroke, a heart attack or Alzheimer’s, Diabetes and I each month I donate money or food to a local food bank. So needed at Christmas time as inflation goes up.

Light a candle with a picture of the person you have lost. Some people may feel a bit uncomfortable in doing that, but can help celebrate that persons lives and have people fill in a memorial book, sharing their stories and messages.

Create a scrapbook or a photo book of photos. Something your kids can do and do as a family and create messages, write letters or create a gallery. I love it near the Southbank towards Vauxhall, where there are hearts. This is memorial of those who died from COVID and can leave a message of someone you know who died of the disease. So if you visiting London, then check it out and write a message if you lost someone to COVID and take a photo that you can keep and feel we still have a connection with the person spiritually.

It is hard because Christmas is about Jesus being born and not grieving of someone who has died and if I could stop people from passing away at Christmas time I would because it feels like, life is unfair and when my nan died, it felt different that it too a while to get used to, because we always spent Christmas with my nan, because my life as I knew it was suddenly gone. This is why I do still have snowball at Christmas, having traditional Christmas dinner and watch my son opening up his presents like those who have passed did when they were alive and so keeping their memory alive.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X