If someone does upset you its not about sitting there and taking it. Hear what they have to say and remember people will see the world differently and part of being a human being and if you don’t agree then say what you want to say. I will say how I feel but if you want to privacy then do that, but never allow anyone to walk all over you.

Respond without retaliation. So not being rude back, but give your point of view but allow the person to talk too. As soon as you jump in it can escalate into a heated argument and it doesn’t need to get that far and if they start getting personal then do speak up and if you need to move away then tell them. I said at one point that you shouldn’t walk away but now since then I disagree with that view. You have the right to walk away and why sit there and take it?

When someone doesn’t want you to sit with them. Leave them be. I remember when working at a holiday camp and there was one woman who sometimes I went to sit at her table she would move to another table and so I let her be and didn’t sit with her. People don’t always want to be around others and be left alone, so I respected that and if they want some time away, give them that space. Part of me was a bit offended but you can’t be to everyone’s taste and sat with people who wanted me to sit with them.

It can take a while to know someone. There have been times when people have not be my fan, but then through friends and people got to know me, then they will warmed towards me. I will say hello but often I will wait for them to talk to me first. There are people who will chat to everyone but for me it depends on how comfortable I feel around them. I have treated people as if they have a the plague but then once I have seen they are okay then been fine. I have learned to be the one who says hello first and not to wait, even if they ignore me.

Have boundaries. I like my space. I like to on my own sometimes. I love my son but often he will jump on me if he has when playing football and won not realising his own strength and so I will say we can hug but not to jump. At school I would hit and not in an aggressive way but intended to be friendly and it upset them and she told me she was happy about it and so stopped. Sometimes we can be unaware of our own behaviour even when it is meant to be friendly can make someone happy so still friends today and glad she pulled me up on it.

Accepting peoples faults and their different point of view. You can no matter how great you get on can get on each others nerves. Friendships came be turbulent but still be friends for ever. I like a friendships where you talk about everything and anything and not judged but still have a different point of view but it doesn’t have to be an end of the friendship. Its good to have people who are different around you. If they are constantly disagreeing or supporting someone in your group of friends on everything or purposely because they don’t want to undermine whenever you talk about then that is different. However we all have faults and when you can laugh about it then you know they have your back and you have theirs.

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Carrie X